Band advice needed

[DRBassist]

I recently relocated to a new state and had to leave my band back home. I spent a few months looking for a new band. It's very challenging as you can imagine.

I finally found a band that is a PERFECT fit for me. Everyone and everything about it met all my requirements. I had an amazing jam with them. We hit it off and everything was great. And they really want me to join the band. Very happy and excited!

Here's the caveat... rehearsals are about 1 1/2 hours away. Don't suggest rehearsing in a different place because rehearsals are at the drummer’s house, and he has an incredible studio set up. I would never ask them to drive somewhere else to PAY for a rehearsal space that won't be half as nice.

I think I'm willing to do it, but I don't want to have 3 months go by and I can't take the drive anymore and bail. It wouldn't be fair to them.

Thoughts, ideas, suggestions? I seriously don't know what to do.

 

[WI Short Scaler]

If the band really checks all the other boxes except the drive than maybe the thing to do is discuss the drive with them. Tell them that the time on the road would be a drag on your time/enthusiasm so the practices should be scheduled accordingly. Like only at times where you can get a good solid couple hours, maybe less frequently than if they were 10 mins away.

Just be sure you're all on the same page to accommodate your time on the road. It's all I can think of.

 

[ArtechnikA]

How frequently are rehearsals and how often are they playing out?
For me, it's that ratio that's important...
A band that 'rehearses' once a week but plays out once a year [ BTDT ] is not a band, it's a club... [ IMO ]. Boy's night out.
OTOH -- if a band is playing out every weekend, why are they rehearsing ?

 

[Core Creek]

I recently relocated to a new state and had to leave my band back home. I spent a few months looking for a new band. It's very challenging as you can imagine.

I finally found a band that is a PERFECT fit for me. Everyone and everything about it met all my requirements. I had an amazing jam with them. We hit it off and everything was great. And they really want me to join the band. Very happy and excited!

Here's the caveat... rehearsals are about 1 1/2 hours away. Don't suggest rehearsing in a different place because rehearsals are at the drummer’s house, and he has an incredible studio set up. I would never ask them to drive somewhere else to PAY for a rehearsal space that won't be half as nice.

I think I'm willing to do it, but I don't want to have 3 months go by and I can't take the drive anymore and bail. It wouldn't be fair to them.

Thoughts, ideas, suggestions? I seriously don't know what to do.

I’m in a band where rehearsals are an hour and 45 minutes away - each way (also in NJ). But we play pretty much every weekend and since I joined 7 months ago we only had two rehearsals. Luckily I’ve been able to prepare at home, confirm keys through texts, and correct mistakes (due to band idiosyncrasies) between gigs.

If the goal is to play out, perhaps limit the number of rehearsals, and do a lot of the work at home. It can be done.

I will say that at the last rehearsal we had the guitar player was unprepared, and the rest of the band was iffy on their parts for songs. I chart everything and confirm keys ahead of time so I don’t need to be there. If the next rehearsal is similarly unproductive I’ll simply tell them to do them without me.

But if the “hang” is a big part of why you like the band I guess you’ll be driving often. I was in a band last year on guitar and the drive was an hour and 15 minutes to Delaware, but the band respected my time, only rehearsed ahead of gigs, and I would show up to the area and shop at Trader Joe’s and check out the local guitar center - makes the trip more productive.

 

[mrcbass]

Personally, my weekly rehearsal radius is about 30 minutes. I'll give a little for the right project, but no way I'd drive 90 minutes for regular rehearsals. I would get quite burned out driving 3 hours round trip every week. I've actually gotten quite used to no rehearse bands - but it really requires the right people. I don't mind regular PRODUCTIVE rehearsals, but got really tired of the getting together just to go over the same stuff over and over rehearsals.

1. It's not really a fit, pass. Maybe agree to sub for them.
2. Negotiate less frequent, longer rehearsals. If it truly were a good fit for me, the musicians wouldn't need regular rehearsals - they'd do their work at home and make minor adjustments at rehearsals. Maybe a once a month 3-4 hour rehearsal until ready and then rehearse only to tighten up if we're not gigging regularly or when adding new material.

 

[Killing Floor]

That’s a long haul but you should decide if you have better options or not. It’s not a bad thing if you decide to leave anyway because you have to be true to yourself.
How often are rehearsals? How soon is the nearest gig (let’s call that the reward) and how do you feel about your best outcomes with this band?

And definitely be ready to play when you make that drive.

 

[klokker]

I drive an hour and 15 minutes to rehearsal and they are roughly once a week. But I have to drive 1/2 hour to get groceries. To me it's nothing.

If you enjoy the band, I think it's worth it once a week. People drive 3 hours one way just to watch their kid play a basketball game all the time.

Go for it!

 

[klokker]

One more thing though. Don't hang the drive on your bandmates, something like, "I drive all this way, blah, blah, blah."

 

[pepj]

Depends on what you achieve.
I think 1 run through is ok, and if you crack that, why would you schedule anymore anytime soon.

From scratch and for songs you've never heard before, then 3 get togethers of 3 hrs each plus your own diligent homework, should mean you only top up every couple of months for new material.
And thats assuming you are actively gigging.
If they aren't, then it is not a band in my eyes.

Agree that any band travel over 1 hr each way has to return good positive dividends.

 

[sean_on_bass]

Go with your gut, which seems to be telling you that you won't want to do that drive for very long.

 

[gln1955]

Is this a cover band? If so, you shouldn't need to rehearse weekly for three months. Like other's have said, push for longer, less frequent rehearsals and make sure they are a productive use of your time.

 

[LiptonJigglers]

Nope. Don't do it. I did it for 8 years. 2hrs each way. Every Sunday. Dodging kangaroos, idiots holding hands in both lanes going 20-30kmh under the speed limit, long haul road train trucks, all with the sun in the eyes coming home.
It soon becomes monotonous, tedious, dangerous and plays havoc with personal relationships at home and costs a fortune in fuel and adds miles to the vehicle, just to play 45 boring songs that never improve and become just as boring and tedious as the journey.

Now, or once I get over this bout of illness, there will be no weekend rehearsals and no more driving more than 30 mins and no more putting up with musicians making the same mistakes over and over again for 8 years.

 

[Hawk256]

Had drummer friend that lived in North Georgia and played with a band in Nashville. 3 1/2 hour drive. They would rehearse on weekends and he spent the night at the singers house. He did that for about 5 years. I couldn't do it though.

 

[turf3]

I'd say to consider two things.

1) how often ARE rehearsals? Without getting into all the chest-thumping about REAL bands versus music clubs, that is a consideration. Some bands (no judgement) rehearse every week; others once a month; some go for years without a rehearsal.

2) Where are the gigs? If everyone but you is located near that rehearsal location, and if all the gigs are way over there, then that might be the thing that scotches it.

 

[Zooberwerx]

Nope. Don't do it. I did it for 8 years. 2hrs each way. Every Sunday. Dodging kangaroos, idiots holding hands in both lanes going 20-30kmh under the speed limit, long haul road train trucks, all with the sun in the eyes coming home.
It soon becomes monotonous, tedious, dangerous and plays havoc with personal relationships at home and costs a fortune in fuel and adds miles to the vehicle, just to play 45 boring songs that never improve and become just as boring and tedious as the journey.

Now, or once I get over this bout of illness, there will be no weekend rehearsals and no more driving more than 30 mins and no more putting up with musicians making the same mistakes over and over again for 8 years.

Where the heck are you?

Riis

 

[crucislancer]

I recently relocated to a new state and had to leave my band back home. I spent a few months looking for a new band. It's very challenging as you can imagine.

I finally found a band that is a PERFECT fit for me. Everyone and everything about it met all my requirements. I had an amazing jam with them. We hit it off and everything was great. And they really want me to join the band. Very happy and excited!

Here's the caveat... rehearsals are about 1 1/2 hours away. Don't suggest rehearsing in a different place because rehearsals are at the drummer’s house, and he has an incredible studio set up. I would never ask them to drive somewhere else to PAY for a rehearsal space that won't be half as nice.

I think I'm willing to do it, but I don't want to have 3 months go by and I can't take the drive anymore and bail. It wouldn't be fair to them.

Thoughts, ideas, suggestions? I seriously don't know what to do.

How close are the other band members to rehearsal? And, once the gigs start rolling in, will you be playing these gigs 90 minutes away (or more) from home?

 

[rtslinger]

If this is a original band and you like the material and you think it may lead to something yes do it.
If this is a cover band all of you except maybe the singers to work up the backing vocals and harmonies don't have to rehearse together at all. I am in a cover band for the past 20 years and I don't see their faces till we hit the stage.

 

[Wesley R]

Are the gigs going to be just as far away?

 

[LiptonJigglers]

Where the heck are you?

Riis

Perth Western Australia

 

[Core Creek]

I'd say to consider two things.

1) how often ARE rehearsals? Without getting into all the chest-thumping about REAL bands versus music clubs, that is a consideration. Some bands (no judgement) rehearse every week; others once a month; some go for years without a rehearsal.

2) Where are the gigs? If everyone but you is located near that rehearsal location, and if all the gigs are way over there, then that might be the thing that scotches it.

This is something to consider. I live in Pennsylvania (near the NJ border) and most gigs are between an hour and a half to two hour drive each way because that’s where they book. But the pay is substantially more than gigs near me and again, almost no rehearsals.