We held some singing auditions at our drummer's place last week. This woman came in, did her audition (meh), asked to use the bathroom, and then left after a little brief conversation. The second audition followed immediately after. He did his thing, asked to use the bathroom, and came right back out and pointed out to our drummer that his toilet was "broken". Seems our first candidate dropped a big dook, clogged the crapper, and split.
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Band Audition Nightmares
- Thread starter 88ric2030
- Start date
jive1
Commercial User
As I'm laughing my a$$ off, I'm glad that sometimes you don't outgrow potty humor.
So what I want to know is, how did you fix it?
I didn't stick around much longer after that either. Our drummer was pretty far from happy, though.
singer shows up wearing full on leather with an equally leather skinned lady & proceeds to tell us that the police are puzzys & santana sucks & the only thing he is going to sing is zeppelin. cause he used to be in a world famous zep cover band making 10k a night! i asked him to leave after we did over the hills & far away & ramble. the only zep we knew.
svtb15
Inactive
- Mar 22, 2004
- 13,004
- 4,741
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- I play it all. Whatever works for the gig. Q+
Oh that is AWESOME !!!!!!!
Now that sounds like Fun to me!
Now that sounds like Fun to me!
I had an interesting "audition" once. I was going to audition for this band that wanted to audition on a Friday night. Which seemed odd to me, since Fridays aren't usually a night that bands do this sort of thing. But, the guitarist was middle aged, so I figured it must have been a day job thing.
Well, I got there, and it was this swanky house. And they were having a housewarming party there. They had a killer set up with stage, backline, and etc. Found out after a couple of practice tunes, the guy just called some players in so he could have some entertainment at his house. So, having figured that out, I played a few tunes with the guys and then proceeded to make a total boor out of myself at the party. I didn't know anyone there, and probably would have never run into anyone there again, as it definitely wasn't my crowd. I had people get me drinks that I never drank. I ate every piece of food I could, even raiding their fridge. I c*ck-blocked every dude there, by nudging in on their action and flirting with the lady they were talking to. I ate more, and handled the fancy artwork in the house and asking people around me dumb questions about it, like "Does this look like a penis to you?" I kept on being a boor until I decided I was bored and then went home. At least, I was well entertained.
I wonder if someone will post about auditioning a bassist who came to their party and made an @$$ of themselves.
No I think he was auditioning too and it ran way over because they were really into him, and maybe even forgot someone else was coming. Doen't matter, they sucked anyway.
Just wonder what you guys think is "good etiquette" for getting back to someone after an audition. I played with some guys last week who I am familiar with from the music scene, and seemed really happy with my playing, and not too happy with anybody else who came over. It will be a week tomorrow after they said I would "hear from them shortly". I though this one was in the bag and a no-brainer Excuse my over confidence, but I've been playing bass since 1979, I can feel it when I nail something, and can read other guys expressions and can tell they are feeling the same way. I haven't contacted them yet, don't want to appear pushy. Do you think that's lame ? I really like their music.
Just to shed a little more light on the situation; I know the drummer is especially familiar with me, but it's more of the lead singer/rhythm guitarist/songwriter's band, who doesn't really know me, and who I've been dealing with throughout the audition process. Both their band and the band I played in for ten years (left about 7 years ago)have histories that date back to the early 90's and are both fairly well regarded in the genre of music we play (power pop), so their is a lot of mutual respect between us. Although these guys have always had a little more of an "in" with the downtown hipsters, whereas my old band were a little more "outsiders".
Send them a "Thank You" note. Inside it, tell them that you enjoyed the time spent with them, hope to hear from them soon, and wish them well regardless of whether they call you back or not.
Based solely on where I lived at the time, I auditioned for a multi-instrumental music scholarship at a Mormon college, as well as its 'sort-of' affiliated LDS Institute of Religion. (No religion bashing, please). The audition was very formal, and very, very conservative. The thing was, I was a non-Mormon who was quite visibly not from there, and didn't look much like the rest of the conservative campus population. I had long hair, I smoked, wore wacky clothes - you know, a punk kid. However, I thought it would be a hoot to tryout, and I really wanted a post-secondary music education.
Be careful what you ask for....
Next thing you know, I'm awarded the scholarship. Tuition, books, yada yada. However, I'm now in at least four different bands, playing all day, every day with a bunch of talented, but extremely square musos. They'd go to church on the weekends, and I'd go play the bars and honky-tonks and show up Monday morning with a terrible hangover. I was never wasted at a performance with them, and here's the funny thing: After watching our elaborate performance of the Edgar Winter classic "Frankenstein", the Dean called our music obscene and disbanded the whole LDS Institute music program.
Be careful what you ask for....
Next thing you know, I'm awarded the scholarship. Tuition, books, yada yada. However, I'm now in at least four different bands, playing all day, every day with a bunch of talented, but extremely square musos. They'd go to church on the weekends, and I'd go play the bars and honky-tonks and show up Monday morning with a terrible hangover. I was never wasted at a performance with them, and here's the funny thing: After watching our elaborate performance of the Edgar Winter classic "Frankenstein", the Dean called our music obscene and disbanded the whole LDS Institute music program.
2 stories come to mind....I went on one audition...cover bands. Didnt know any of the song list beforehand...they said, "We'll just jam on some stuff we all know and it'll be fine." Turns out I didn't know any of their "standards" (Brown Eyed Girl and crap like that), but I knew all the AC/DC and other stuff they did. Decided not to take the gig because I found out the guitar player and singer were married and the drummer was the singer's brother. I would ALWAYS be the odd man out.
Another one, I got their song list one day, audition the next day. "Just bring your bass, we have amps you can use". It was an old 50 watt-ish Fender bass amp. Could not be heard once the band fired up. We rigged a way to run it thru the monitors and practice PA, one of the songs was "You oughta know" by Alanis Morissette. I learned it on the way to the gig. Once I played it, they said I played it better than their old bass player ever did. I went.....YIKES. Never went back.
Eventually formed my own band and never looked back.
Another one, I got their song list one day, audition the next day. "Just bring your bass, we have amps you can use". It was an old 50 watt-ish Fender bass amp. Could not be heard once the band fired up. We rigged a way to run it thru the monitors and practice PA, one of the songs was "You oughta know" by Alanis Morissette. I learned it on the way to the gig. Once I played it, they said I played it better than their old bass player ever did. I went.....YIKES. Never went back.
Eventually formed my own band and never looked back.
Yeah that's basically what I did earlier this evening, waiting for a response back.
I auditioned and got the gig in this one band a couple of years ago. The drummer was an older guy (I was maybe 20/21, he was like 45) and never practiced once outside of rehearsal - which we were paying for space. Everyone else had their parts down and rehearsed but he could never do it because he just kept coming up with excuse after excuse. Then we started auditioning singers... After a few, we found this great guy who could sing really well and play guitar just as good, but Mr. Drummer wanted to have someone who sounded EXACTLY like Dave Mustaine, so that was no good. Luckily, I got a call to audition for a different band and didn't need to stick around with that group anymore. This was all in the span of a month or so.
Nowadays, I just email the guys and state my experience, and my equipment. Then in that same email I ask them for a few samples or songs. Upon hearing back from them; If I like it, I'll inquire further but so far thats been a great way of not having any stories fit for this thread.
3/4 bands that looked promising online/on paper sure turned out to be hopeless duds.
3/4 bands that looked promising online/on paper sure turned out to be hopeless duds.
After disbanding my band of five years a month ago, I got together tonight with my lead guitarist and a neighbor who plays drums to see if anything clicked. It did. We like him, he likes us, and so we're going to move ahead and put a band together.
That is all.
That is all.
I absolutely loathe holding auditions. In my area we have three ways to find people. Craig's List, a local radio stations classified board, and a state wide musicians magazine that has a classified section.
I've presently got an ad on all three, since my drummer and I (we've been in countless bands together over the last 15 years) have started jamming together again. So far I've gotten about 30 responses, which I screen by having them email me first, then if they sound legit I ask for a phone number. If the phone "interview" goes well, we move on to the audition. Out of 30 or so responses, ONE has made it to the audition phase. He turned out to be a flake who just talked a good game.
I do enjoy it more now that I host the practice place and own the PA.
I've presently got an ad on all three, since my drummer and I (we've been in countless bands together over the last 15 years) have started jamming together again. So far I've gotten about 30 responses, which I screen by having them email me first, then if they sound legit I ask for a phone number. If the phone "interview" goes well, we move on to the audition. Out of 30 or so responses, ONE has made it to the audition phase. He turned out to be a flake who just talked a good game.
I do enjoy it more now that I host the practice place and own the PA.
I auditioned a couple of years ago with a classic rock cover band. The lead singer/rhythm guitar is an old friend of mine & he approached me because their bass player was going on job-related hiatus for the summer. My friend gave me a copy of their song list - all basic classic rock covers, nothing very difficult & all very familiar - we agreed on 6-8 of them that we'd do at audition & set the time & place.
Audition comes, the band "leader" (lead guitar, no vocals) decides to just blast through the entire set list! The leader had never been in a band before - at least, I hoped he hadn't! If he had, he certainly hadn't learned much from the experience. There was no nuance to anything at all. Whenever he wasn't soloing, he'd just hammer bar chords with no change in volume from his solos! Never mind playing "fills", or anything else! I'm sure most of us can imagine what that sounded like. After one Tom Petty tune, I even commented on how TP tunes (this one in particular) emphasize a dynamic range, with sections played quietly, others louder, etc. Leader said "Yep" as if he understood, & launched into the next song, just like before (i.e. full-volume bar chords).
After we churned through their entire set, leader starts talking as if I'm in. I wasn't so sure. They had a gig coming up in 2-3 days that was a charity race for zero pay. Not only that, but it was about 1.5 hour drive, which had to be completed by 9:00 AM because roads were being shut down! Actual gig started at 3:00PM, so we were looking at about a 12-hour commitment. I politely declined, giving some made-up excuse. The leader then informed me that I couldn't be in any other bands, which for me is a deal-killer. I told him, knowing (hoping?) full well that he'd never accept it, that if he wanted exclusivity on my part, he'd have to pay very well for it. Fortunately, the counter offer was rejected, so I had a convenient out that saved face for all concerned.
Later, my friend confided to me that he's looking for an excuse to leave. I could imagine a best-case scenario, had I joined: I'd have probably taken more & more vocal responsibility, up to the point where my only friend in the band could feel comfortable leaving, leaving me on my own with d-bag leader/guitarist!
I saw this band play live a couple of weeks ago. They've added a 3rd guitar - no vocals, no solos, just a 3rd "rhythm" guitar. So, now they've got 3 guys hammering the same bar chords 80% of the time!
Audition comes, the band "leader" (lead guitar, no vocals) decides to just blast through the entire set list! The leader had never been in a band before - at least, I hoped he hadn't! If he had, he certainly hadn't learned much from the experience. There was no nuance to anything at all. Whenever he wasn't soloing, he'd just hammer bar chords with no change in volume from his solos! Never mind playing "fills", or anything else! I'm sure most of us can imagine what that sounded like. After one Tom Petty tune, I even commented on how TP tunes (this one in particular) emphasize a dynamic range, with sections played quietly, others louder, etc. Leader said "Yep" as if he understood, & launched into the next song, just like before (i.e. full-volume bar chords).
After we churned through their entire set, leader starts talking as if I'm in. I wasn't so sure. They had a gig coming up in 2-3 days that was a charity race for zero pay. Not only that, but it was about 1.5 hour drive, which had to be completed by 9:00 AM because roads were being shut down! Actual gig started at 3:00PM, so we were looking at about a 12-hour commitment. I politely declined, giving some made-up excuse. The leader then informed me that I couldn't be in any other bands, which for me is a deal-killer. I told him, knowing (hoping?) full well that he'd never accept it, that if he wanted exclusivity on my part, he'd have to pay very well for it. Fortunately, the counter offer was rejected, so I had a convenient out that saved face for all concerned.
Later, my friend confided to me that he's looking for an excuse to leave. I could imagine a best-case scenario, had I joined: I'd have probably taken more & more vocal responsibility, up to the point where my only friend in the band could feel comfortable leaving, leaving me on my own with d-bag leader/guitarist!
I saw this band play live a couple of weeks ago. They've added a 3rd guitar - no vocals, no solos, just a 3rd "rhythm" guitar. So, now they've got 3 guys hammering the same bar chords 80% of the time!
Well I got a response back from him this morning. He said they"decided to go with this guy named Ed who was really, really good", and he apologized for not getting back to me sooner. I squandered about two weeks learning their material, even took off work the day of the audition to practice some more before going over there. My time could've been more productively spent writing and recording my own material, like I normally do in the evening.
