• TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
    Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
    Join freeLog in
    Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.

Band Audition Nightmares

Well I got a response back from him this morning. He said they"decided to go with this guy named Ed who was really, really good", and he apologized for not getting back to me sooner. I squandered about two weeks learning their material, even took off work the day of the audition to practice some more before going over there. My time could've been more productively spent writing and recording my own material, like I normally do in the evening.

So you assumed you'd get the gig?
 
So you assumed you'd get the gig?

Yeah, absolutely. Had that little run through of those 6 songs been a show, it would've been awesome. Those guys appeared pleased as **** with it, and went on about how great it was. In fact at the end, the lead guitarist said, 'did we really just play 6 songs, it flew by so quick". It was like he really wanted to do more. It was almost felt like we had rehearsed a bunch of times already.
 
mine was when auditioning for my the band im in right now. the first day i met them the guitarist had eaten some bad fast food. we tried to jam but couldnt get through a song because he had to throw down his guitar and run to the bathroom. Everything went well though. they called me the next day we got togather a few days later and jammed again and they told me that im their bass player ha.
 
A year or two ago a friend of mine that I used to jam with invited me to audition for his new band. I knew some of the songs they play, so I wasn't really worried. When I got to his place we were waiting for his band mates to show, and the "other bass player" they invited shows up with a dimebag tribute guitar..... the worst part, the singer couldn't tell the difference. Needless to say, I laughed so hard, Im not allowed at their practice sessions anymore.
 
We auditiond a singer a while ago. He had the highest voice I ever heard on any man,woman,anilmal you name it! Imagine some sucking helium out of a balloon and singing RATM haha I had to "go to the bathroom" and ran out laughing my butt off it was just insane haha. Later that night when he left everyone just cryed they were laughin so hard
 
Auditioned to play guitar for a band once where the drummer admitted he'd be running the band and throwing sticks at you and yelling at screaming at you during practice until he 'felt it was right'. It was inside the basement of his house and he was insistent that he could barely hear my amp, so i turned it up. All the while he was complaining that he 'couldnt hear it'. So i kept turning it up. At one point he said something to the likings that it sounded like the speaker was faulting and i needed a new amp right away because my amp wasn't going to be loud enough for any of the bar shows theyd play. I was only at half on my amp. Very strange people, very strange audition.
 
Back in the 80s I was working in a band to pay my way through school, but they weren't too good, wasn't the kind of music I wanted to play. I answered an ad in the metro times, a local weekly that had musicians wanted section, before the interwebs became popular. It was for a funk based R&B band. Perfect stuff, just what I was looking for.

So I show up, the address is in Detroit, turns out its all black guys in the band. Guy answers the door, must think I'm the pizza guy, "What do you want?" Like I must be at the wrong house. :D

I said, I'm the guy you talked to on the phone, auditioning for the bass player.... He gives me this look, like he can't believe what he's hearing. So invites me in, I meet the guys. Downstairs we go. Except for the drummer, he's not even bothering to come down. They turn on a drum machine and off we go.

It's going pretty well, went over some pretty had rhythms, I picked up pretty fast having big band jazz trumpet background, I'm no stranger to syncopation.

Pretty soon the drummer peeks his head around the corner, must have been wondering who was playing bass... :bassist: Cause it couldn't be that white guy they just let in.. lol

So he gets behind the kit, things go well. Talking to them, they actually wanted me, but weren't playing much yet, and I couldn't quit a solid gig at the time since I was depending on the gig to pay tuition...

I'd have been a lot better bass player today had I gone with them, they were good players. I needed the cash though... hard to find 5 night a week house gigs even back then.

Randy
 
Yeah, absolutely. Had that little run through of those 6 songs been a show, it would've been awesome. Those guys appeared pleased as **** with it, and went on about how great it was. In fact at the end, the lead guitarist said, 'did we really just play 6 songs, it flew by so quick". It was like he really wanted to do more. It was almost felt like we had rehearsed a bunch of times already.

So you were really good, but ol' Ed was really, really good. Just goes to show you.
 
Last November this band answers my cl add and youtube videos saying they need me for their band. So late one night they arrange a rehearsal in Toronto's really seedy/sketchy west end. So it takes me about an hour and 15 minutes by subway and bus to get there. When I get there I have to find the place where they are and i call the guitar player and he says "oh yeah we canceled for tonight, i thought the keyboard player told you(i've never spoken to the keyboard player)"

So the next week we jam finally and it's going good. And there was a gig on the thursday. So thursday morning after I'd arranged for my dad to bring my Rickenbacker from Barrie to me for the gig that night I get an email saying "my services won't be required for tonight" ***, apparently their bass player decided not to quit. I then proceeded to tell them to **** off.

About 10 months later I get an email from the guitar player saying "hey we need someone to play bass because our bass is moving" So I go to his house one day all the way downtown,,,,and,,,he's not there.....Couple days later he gets back to me and arranges for me to come back to his house. I get there and a lady answers the door and says he's not there.. *** as i'm leaving he comes to the door "oh hey man i fell asleep, yeah lets jam" He takes me to his room(cellar) and it's covered in sand on the floor, we play one his songs for like 2 minutes and he goes "ok i'll call ya later man for some gigs" Then he goes "hey have we met before" ***

I get home and email him saying "hey hope some gigs can get going soon". He replies "are styles are too different we won't be able to gel for this band"(we like the exact same bands).
 
A guy answers my craigslist ad, his band needs a bass player. We agree to meet up at a nearby bar/restaurant to discuss. I show up my usual 5 minutes early, and they guy's already halfway done eating...he's in a rush, got somewhere else to go as soon as we're done talking.

We talk about his band for awhile. They seem very inexperienced but I figure maybe I can help bring some structure. The band's got a bass player but the guy I'm meeting with says the band wants him to switch to guitar or keys (which he plays) to fill out the sound and bring in a new bassist.

I show up at a rehearsal - a solid half-hour away farther than he said - and immediately discover the "inexperience" will probably be insurmountable. Only one of the guys has ever been in a working band before and his role was very minor. They're all in their 30s but have the mentality of redneck high school kids. "Breaks" every 15 minutes for more shoot-em-up video games and bong hits. At least half the guys - singer included - are playing at strictly beginner level.

Once my gear is set up and small talk's been made and it's time to play, I start playing and hear another bassline that's not mine. Their bass player is playing at the same time as me. I stop playing, the band keeps going (including bass player #2). They're looking at me. "WHATS WRONG" the guitarist seems to be mouthing to me. I put my hands up. "Who's playing bass here?" I get no answer, just confused looks.

At this point I decide, what the heck, I know I'm never playing with these dudes again and the bong hits are feeling good so....whatever. I just try my best to tune out the other bass player and jam along for now. It sounds as good as one would expect, like one big busy low end wash.

After the next "break" I figure I should talk to the other bass player and figure out how to proceed, when he's going to switch to keyboards or something. I ask him and he just kind of stares blankly at me. "Nooooo, I'm the bass player." As it turns out, nobody mentioned the instrument switch to him, and he's not interested, and doesn't even own a keyboard anyway. I ask him if he was wondering why I was there, playing bass. "Mike just said you were going to come down and jam with us."

The next morning the guitarist emails me, "We've been talking about it and the 2-bass-player sound probably isn't going to work out. Thanks for coming out anyway."
 
I went to an audition a few months ago. The female singer told me they did 150 paid dates last year, so it sounded promising enough to take a shot at it.

I drive up to where the audition is supposed to be and discover the address is in a trailer park - a very rundown trailer park at that. The audition is in a metal building next to the "house", which was a trailer that someone had built a house around. This took place in Texas in August, so it's about 100 degrees in the shade. The guitarist shows up with some killer gear; the drummer, not so much.

Anyway, it turns out the female singer also has a male singer in tow. Ever see the Family Guy episode where Peter and Lois sing in the Quahog talent show completely wasted on weed? This was the exact same thing - the singers fired up the bong before they screeched the first note.

The funniest part? They grandly assumed they had dazzled me to point I couldn't wait to hit the stage with them. They were truly insulted when I turned them down.
 
I went to an audition only to discover an old band mate that had parted ways on very bad terms was fronting the band.

Several years ago I played in a rock band that slowly fizzled out because the front man's (we'll call him bob here) song-writing, guitar and vocal skills were just alright but nothing all that special. We played a few gigs, but one by one everyone (but Bob) lost interest and the project just mercifully faded away.

I've been through this same scenario lots of times, no biggie It just didn't work out, but Bob took it all personally and started bad mouthing all the band mates to everyone in our circle of friends and on his myspace. Bob was a likable enough guy so we all just pretty much ignored everything he'd said and went on to other projects.

So a few years go by and I reply to an ad from a band looking for a bassist. Their drummer had posted this ad claiming their frontman has been turing and recording with some fairly big name bands for 20 years. (but didn't say with who) The ad also claimed their original tunes were similar to Wilco and the Jayhawks. (but they didn't have any tunes on line)

So that should of been warning enough but I decide to give it a shot anyway. I show up at their rehearsal studio, get all set up and they tell me their singer will be just a little late. Their drummer, lead guitarist and I start jamming for a short while and then... here comes (you guessed it) good ol-Bob strolling in.

He takes one surprised look at me and acts like I'm his long lost best friend. I immediately get the urge to just pack up and hit the road but decided to stick it out, heck mebey ol-Bobs gotten better and finally wrote some good tunes I think to myself.

Nope, He just played the same old tired blues progressions with lack luster melodies and lame lyrics as before, only this time he's got the absolutely worst drummer I've ever had the misfortune of hearing and a wanker leed guitarist that made up for his lack of talent by playing way too loud.

They all thought I was a perfect fit and just assume I'd wanna commit to joining their band right there on the spot. I always have hard time telling people they suck, so as I was rolling my rig out the door I told them I had a couple more auditions scheduled before I could decide. I really tried but I never could find the words to call or email them back.

I still see their same ads seeking a bass player a year or so later now, its just sad :(