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Band member into drugs
- Thread starter SXema
- Start date
OP -now that you let him go. do you have any potential drummers for your project?
Hopefully your old drummer figures it out.
Not a musician story but i had one one of my rugby buddies that had a heart condition die because he could not stop doing heroin with his other drug "friends".
Really a waste and hard on his parents -just sad and useless all around!
Hopefully your old drummer figures it out.
Not a musician story but i had one one of my rugby buddies that had a heart condition die because he could not stop doing heroin with his other drug "friends".
Really a waste and hard on his parents -just sad and useless all around!
Set the addict under pressure early on instead of shielding him too long. I was in a band once that was founded by one single guy who wrote all songs. I know some folks here said that if it was only pot it was not too bad and such, but that guy smoked everyday and a lot. He would replace breakfast with pot smoking soon. We would not interfere with his obvious addiction because he was talkative about it in a philosophical way, you know, a bit like the proud Rastafari type of guy. He was self-confident and all. All of a sudden his manners worsened, his social abilities decreased, his utterances started to make less sense and then he said we were all against him and would betray on him. He fired us all, four fellow musicians who did almost anything for him and regarded him a friend. To top it all off, he said he would reform the band with more loyal people. He was later diagnosed with schizophrenic paranoia.
I had a friend years ago - the most natural rock and blues player I've ever known (and I used to know SRV). But the guy was into booze. That made him unreliable and it prevented him from taking care of his own personal business, which made him drink even more. I played one great festival gig with the guy and all eyes were on him the entire show. That was his only good day. We dropped him. It was years ago. He'r either living in a refrigerator box in some alley or dead.
JeezyMcNuggles
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- Feb 23, 2018
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Yup, years ago my drummer went mia on herion. Popped up 3 or 4 months later in Portland. Flash forward about 7 years. He's cleaned up and back in town. Start a little funk blues cover band together. Get about a set and a half of solid material as a trio, and the guy dissapears. Meth this time. Hahahaha. Im totally leaving out the psycho BS that came with it this time. Now, hes in sober living. Hahaha...drummers.
In 20 some years if gigging I found out a little bit if weed and alcohol can be fine. Anything else and it gets worse the more you get to know the person. They might seem fine to begin with... Until they get comfortable.
maybe the guy got bored of playing the same cover tunes and is doing drugs because it makes your bandmates sound a lot better than they think they are.
I've been lucky enough to never have to deal with drugs per se, but alcohol definitely has affected a couple members over the years.
In fact the guitarist I play with now was a hardcore alcoholic in his first tenure with a group I used to be in. He was talked to individually and as a band but couldn't stop so he was asked to leave. The story took another turn when about a year after his departure he showed up to watch a gig we were playing. During his absence he had become an AA member and had straightened up his act. Unknown to him I had just put in my notice that I was leaving that group, so he and I talked a bit and got something new started.
That was about 15 years ago and he is one person I've worked with continually in that time. He is now a 17 year success story as an AA member.
If the guy is talented and you want to keep him, all you can do is address it and see if he's willing to admit there's an issue and that he wants to change. Be supportive but let him know it's not an option that things continue as they are. For my friend the decision to change turned out to be an ultimatum that came from his Mrs. You can only do so much.
In fact the guitarist I play with now was a hardcore alcoholic in his first tenure with a group I used to be in. He was talked to individually and as a band but couldn't stop so he was asked to leave. The story took another turn when about a year after his departure he showed up to watch a gig we were playing. During his absence he had become an AA member and had straightened up his act. Unknown to him I had just put in my notice that I was leaving that group, so he and I talked a bit and got something new started.
That was about 15 years ago and he is one person I've worked with continually in that time. He is now a 17 year success story as an AA member.
If the guy is talented and you want to keep him, all you can do is address it and see if he's willing to admit there's an issue and that he wants to change. Be supportive but let him know it's not an option that things continue as they are. For my friend the decision to change turned out to be an ultimatum that came from his Mrs. You can only do so much.
AA..meh..less than 2% success rate, he beat the odds. However I too was a heavy drinker, drank everyday from early like 11 til end of the night...sometimes 3-4 am..I racked up 3 dwis went to prison..blah blah...anyway I went to the program and did a year in it and didn't drink, quit everything..However after doing that I got sick of the whole program thing..it was all everyone talked about non stop...So I quit going..after awhile I started the mj maintenance thing, and started drinking again but it seemed different, and I didn't like the feeling of getting drunk, and it tapered off to the point where I would only drink 3-4 beers then quit cause I could feel the alcohol taking effect and I didn't like it..
Now I drink only when I play a gig, not always but sometimes..2-3 beers during the entire 6 hours of being there..so there is no intoxication..I never drink at home or go to the bars anymore, so the drinking kind of just ended on its own...I told a friend about that..said I was an alcoholic way back...he said, nah you couldn't have been if you can successfully drink in moderation now..that can't happen..
that brings me to my theory on AA ..their thing is that you label yourself and alcoholic and its for life, but I reject that. I believed that when you are done, it is over and you are not an alcoholic anymore, I think its self defeating to beat yourself up for life. I'm not going to walk around in this world looking down on myself saying i'm an alcoholic, and powerless...screw that, I have all the power..As for AA /NA..I have to ask myself, how can you get well in a sea of dysfunction..?
Hey, whatever works for you. I just pointed out an example of someone I knew well and how it worked for him.
I don't believe he "looks down" upon himself as an alcoholic anymore then I look down on myself as a "former smoker." Solutions are just as individual as the people having the issues in the first place I guess.
You're absolutely correct sir, honestly I think I'm just lucky..
