Bass confessions - episode π

[interp]

Here’s a good near miss story: A bass player friend of mine got a gig doing an Al Jarreau tour many years ago. Got through rehearsals fine; the day of the first show came. Ten to fifteen thousand people in the audience. The drummer counts off the first tune and on one my buddy completely blanks on what the tune is supposed to be. On the ‘and’ of three he remembers it and comes in right.

He said it was the most terrifying half second of his life.

 

[bkbirge]

The cool thing about bass is when you make a major over the top in your face multi-measure held note clam and do it with confidence it just makes the guitar player look bad. If it's shorter than a couple measures call it jazz.

 

[Holy Diver]

I have a few contributions....

First one, not playing bass; call it a “tease” for things to come: Playing for the very first time in front of a crowd (albeit a friendly crowd, a church talent contest), at the tender age of 17. A buddy and I were doing an acoustic guitar duet of “Stairway To Heaven” with me handling vocals, and I spaced out on the lyrics at the end of the 3rd verse in front of about 600 people. Thankfully caught it before it became glaringly obvious.

Fast forward to age 21, my first original rock band. Playing a show at a small club when I find out the hard way that the balky old amp I was using (a Sunn, unknown model) had some kind of short which turned me into the ground. Every time I got too close to the mic to do vocals, I was catching 110 volts right in the jibs. By the end of the set, I looked like Leo Sayer.

Now age 25. Playing a big club, about 800 people there. We’re on the bill with a band I’d tried to get an audition with four years previous with no luck, so I was really wanting to do well and show those jack wagons what they’d passed up on. Problem is, I turn the amp on and nothing happens. While I’m trying to figure out what’s wrong, the club owner, unaware of my little glitch, goes ahead and announces us with great fanfare, which is followed by roughly two minutes of dead air. Silence. Crickets. Eventually I figure out that amps don’t get signal when the send from your effects unit isn’t plugged in all the way. Finally the set begins. Instead of laying a smackdown, I laid an egg.

(Small consolation later when the bass player for the aforementioned band got his feet tangled in his cord and sat down hard on the stage within the first ten seconds of their set.)

Here’s the dinner winner. Not quite a month after my 32nd birthday and I’m in Worcester MA with my band, playing our first show with GWAR. We’re opening band before God Forbid, and Goatwhore is direct support. About 3,000 in attendance. The zenith of my musical career. My profile pic is from that show. Disaster ensued roughly a minute from the end of our last song, when the screw for the strap button on the horn of my bass broke off flush with the body, sending the bass crashing stageward. Somehow I caught it and finished the set hunkered down on stage like I meant to be there:

Heehee.

 

[Heyturnup]

Newer song to the set list, starts with just the bass. I'm playing, the crowd is getting into it,the guitars come in and are muffin it, looking at each other, ***. the singer starts singing non typically bad. I realize I'm in C# and the song is in B. We played the whole song that way, not good. I can handle me making myself look bad, but making everyone but me look bad is way worse.

 

[mohrds]

In High School in the 80's I was playing at a school dance with the cool guys and trying to fit in. I was a legend in my own mind, dancing around, jumping, having a good time....
Until I got my feet tangled in my own cord, yanked the cord out of the amp and fell flat on my face.

Next McDonald's paycheck went toward a cheap wireless rig and I've never used a cord since

I've also made the usual mistakes mentioned here of being on the wrong string, or the wrong fret and just going with it until everyone looks at me funny.

Ahh, good times...

 

[sawzalot]

I hate to say it, but the audience probably didn't even notice. I've played entire songs a half step out of tune and the crowd was as into it as ever.

 

[FronTowardEnemy]

I’ve done worse multiple times throughout my bass playing career.

After a gig like that I was afraid of seeing a Bass Player Wanted ad for my band.

 

[grinx]

Playing a Polynesian heavy metal, biker, Marine bar in Dumfries, VA in the 80's
In the middle of Brown Sugar all 5 of us decided to not play with each other. Drummer and I were pretty sure we were on but 2 guitars and a vocalist scrambling to follow each other did us in. major trainwreck. Singer stopped the song, apologized, we played it again (shouldn't have) and it went fine.

 

[Jakeman]

Oh, so many colossal failures back when I was a slave to alcohol. At one gig at the Boom Boom Room in SF, my guitarist had to walk across the stage and manually move my fingers down a half step. Pretty sure I ended up the night playing cross-legged on the stage floor, an attempt to fight the spinning. I've also walked off stage because I couldn't wait until setbreak for some backstage bathroom "fun". Learned my lesson - 10 years no drinkin'.

 

[G_N]

One time I started playing Billie Jean. The song was Like a virgin. The drummer looked at me with a big smile on his face. I looked down to see the setlist. Then I played the right line. Audience liked it, or didn't notice it...

 

[TNCreature]

My last gig, one song has a nice bass chord arpeggio intro piece that I am proud of. One of the few times I show off a little.
Unfortunately, I still had my octave pedal on from the last song!
Fart fart fart...shame.

 

[kobass]

Back in the late 70's I was in a disco/funk/r&b band (big band-keys, horns, backup singers, etc.). We were playing the ballad "Always and Forever" which was very popular at the time. The dance floor was packed with couples, the lights were turned down low and a small spotlight was aimed at the ever-present (slowly rotating) "disco mirror ball." A magical evening. The bass was WAY up in the mix. I guess I just started daydreaming or something, but I hit a wrong note. I'm not talking about a short/quick/unnoticeable mistake-it sounded like a whale fart echoing out of The Blue Grotto. Every person on the dance floor and everyone in the band immediately turned and glared at me as if I'd committed bloody murder! It still haunts my dreams to this day...

 

[mohrds]

Singer stopped the song, apologized, we played it again (shouldn't have) and it went fine.

My High School band teacher was famous for stopping the band/orchestra during a live performance, apologizing to the audience about how we should know better, then restarting the song. Shame on you, if you were the one who was still playing after everyone else had stopped

 

[TNCreature]

Our lead singer consistently hits my bass with her hand while moving or playing the tambourine, putting my strings out of tune. Then I need to complete whatever song by trying to compensate, if possible.
I have moved to the left of her now until my headless bass arrives.

 

[pglaser01]

First show I ever played.....

Yep same here. Cover band gig, played a bar where I was standing next to the Golden Tee game (I had moved the ficus plant already)

Opened with Bad Company, “Can’t Get Enough”

1...2.....1,2,3 annnnd WHHHOOOOMMMP, what the hell was that????

 

[mikewalker]

One time I started playing Billie Jean. The song was Like a virgin. The drummer looked at me with a big smile on his face. I looked down to see the setlist. Then I played the right line. Audience liked it, or didn't notice it...

MASHUP!

 

[HolmeBass]

Today was a special gig, one where with a packed house and one where we got exposure to loads of potential new fans and promotion. It was going to be great.

We had finished sound check and had a quick bite before the set was to begin. I was calm as ever; we'd played these songs tons of times and I know what I'm doing.

The morning DJ announced us for the crowd and we climbed on stage and strapped on our instruments. We had a big start planned with one of the most popular songs of our set; the guitar started the intro, the people cheered, and as he came around to the one I PLAYED THE WRONG STRING!!! It was a nice long note to be held for two measures so I made sure to pull the string really hard and, in this case, really emphasized the dissonance created by the note. Really set the bar low for the evening.

That's winning, baby.

Anyone else have any colossal screw up stories they don't mind telling .









The rest of the gig went great, BTW, it was just a world class opening clam.

My HS band director used to say if we’re going to make a mistake make a solid loud one.

Hey clams happen, it’s how you bounce back from them and keep the energy going that matters.

 

[Old Garage-Bander]

I make mistakes all the time but I'm usually pretty good at hiding them.

This one though, definitely belongs in the confession file.

I had a wanna-get-away moment just last month at a county fair gig. First song I play one passing note on the D string just two times. Something sounded odd but with my bad monitor mix I couldn't tell who it was. I was in tune for the line check so it couldn't be me. Second song I play an upfront bass line with many notes on the D. The monitor mix is still not dialed in but now I know it's me. Go to the tuner and my D string is perfectly tuned to C#. Apparently tuning key got bumped between line check and downbeat. The recording documented the faux pas as it was loudly broadcast through a big sound system to the large crowd.

The only mistakes I make are in admitting them.

 

[Old Garage-Bander]

First show I ever played.....

I was in a local garage band sometime around 1986.... my first band. The singer knew some people who worked at the local bar. So he got us an ppening slot for a very popular regional act.

Back then I thought I had gone from zero to "bigtime" in about three seconds.

That night we did soundcheck on that "huge" stage. We were using the headliner's backline. The bass rig was a Mesa 400 and 2-15 cab facing cross stage. It sounded humongous.

I was on top of the world. I was about to kill it in front of all of my friends on the same stage with their favorite band.

The time comes. The drummer clicks four times and.... nothing. I'm bainging away on my nass and there's not a sound. The band is off to the races. The song is moving right along. I'm weating to death and have no sound!!!!

Turns out, the sound guy had done exactly what he was supposed to do and put the amp on standby. Heck, I didn't know what standby was. I barely knew the notes on my fretboard as I had been playing about 6 weeks. It was about halfway through the first song when someone in the crew finally ran up there and turned the sucker on.

I was devastated that night. Everything else had gone well, but you know how high school was. Everything was drama.

Did this too. For me I started in the wrong key. Actually started off on the wrong string, right fret though.
Got a couple of dirty looks from band mates (didn’t think they ever listened) then readjusted quickly.

 

[HolmeBass]

Started a first set with Livin on a Prayer. I knew the song obviously, but had never really played it in a band. Drummer clicks it off, and I come in to play that little bass intro. I'm killing it. Got the bass face just right. The band doesn't come in. I'm like, no big deal, go through it again. I look up and my band mates are all looking at me with that "what are you doing" look. I just keep going expecting them to come in. 3rd time through. I'm still killing it. Crowd is anticipating something, bobbing their heads, tapping their feet. Singer comes over and says in my ear I'm playing the wrong song. So, for about 2 minutes now, I'm playing the wrong song. I lock eyes with the drummer, come around again, and hit the one on the real intro. Crowd applauded, get through the intro, band comes in, and we really do kill the song (we had a great singer). Had a great 4 set show.

After the 1st set, a few "rockers" come up to me and tell me that was the best intro to Livin on a Prayer they have ever heard. What was I playing, how did we come up with it. Band asked me to never do that again. I never did it again.

Excellent application of the two big rules: #1 - Don't stop; #2 - Keep going! Nicely done!