Best bass for self defense?

[Saxn]

..in the last 4 years I've been beaten into the head so hard I lost proper use of my right hand for a week (at random, in the countryside), been mugged at an ATM machine and accidentally almost killed the guy, been kicked up the ass lifting gear into a countryside gig by a drunk stranger, had a death threat from a junkie about 6 months ago, attacked by two of them yesterday, been thrown down a flight of stairs at a nightclub for sitting on the wrong seat..the list goes on. Violence is hard to avoid in Irish life, especially if you're over 6 foot in a country of relatively small people.

I lived outside Ireland for my entire twenties and never accosted ONCE..

Sounds like a party... why don't I come on over and we'll just fight our way 'round the Emerald Isle for a few weeks!! I'll bring the old, cheap Yamaha.

 

[schmig]

Cort Gene Simmons Axe Bass:Amazon:Musical Instruments

I swear...I'm tempted.

 

[arsie]

Sounds like a party... why don't I come on over and we'll just fight our way 'round the Emerald Isle for a few weeks!! I'll bring the old, cheap Yamaha.

Sounds like the start of a new Tarantino movie.

 

[whodom]

Kramer Duke. Headless with an aluminum neck. You can definitely break noggins with that thing.

 

[Rockmusician]

I would just carry a baseball bat or a taser.

 

[Grievyre]

Gene's bass.

 

[whitefuneral]

Gene Simmons Cort Axe, of course!
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B003H8XAFY/ref=aw_d_iv_musical-instruments?is=l

Beat me to it...

 

[pnut166]

T-40. Instant craineotomy.

 

[kevteop]

Warwick Thumb would be my choice. Small but dense, mine is heavier than any 5-string I've played, also neck-through construction for sturdiness.

 

[Rickengeezer]

T-40. Instant craineotomy.

This....my rough bar gig backup, I keep it loaded on the stand. Nice thing is that the craineotomy probably wouldn't give the T-40 a ding, either.

 

[Tupac]

Posting in epic thread.

 

[eyeballkid]

I would recommend the jazz. I actually once cracked a guy in the head with my jazz at a gig mid-song... it totally stayed in tune! Thats what Im talkin about!

 

[Matthijs]

I vote the legendary Mothman

That's hardly a weapon of self defence. Why don't you invite Chuck Norris and all of Khadaffi's surviving sons too?

 

[pasta4lnch]

...and just for good measure get 2 small cylindrical pieces of wood and attach them to each end of a B string for nun chucks or a garrote!

 

[IngerAlb]

+1 for Gene's Cort Axe - from distance it will look like the real deal

 

[EricssonB]

Small man syndrome...very popular in Ireland..you know the whole "fighting Irish" thing? It's no mere stereotype..and it's got nothing to do with throwing off the yoke of British occupation etc...basically the Irish like to beat the **** out of each other in the streets. Since nobody carries weapons here, everybody is a valid target.

As for my own size/appearance...I can make a precision look like a guitar:

[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]

Am a pacifist/bassist/nerd/software engineer but am built big...in the last 4 years I've been beaten into the head so hard I lost proper use of my right hand for a week (at random, in the countryside), been mugged at an ATM machine and accidentally almost killed the guy, been kicked up the ass lifting gear into a countryside gig by a drunk stranger, had a death threat from a junkie about 6 months ago, attacked by two of them yesterday, been thrown down a flight of stairs at a nightclub for sitting on the wrong seat..the list goes on. Violence is hard to avoid in Irish life, especially if you're over 6 foot in a country of relatively small people.

I lived outside Ireland for my entire twenties and never accosted ONCE..

Awesome! Now I don't think I'll ever want to go to Ireland!

Are there any concealed carry laws?

...you know, a bass is easily concealed...

 

[grendle]

Yeah a Berger or a pointy BC Rich gets my vote.

 

[mindwell]

70's Fender Jazz bass, at the 2:05 mark. Preferably a 4-bolt neck.

And yeah, that's me in my youth. Lot mellower now.

 

[Yorick]

Just screw a couple of old bass strings to a baseball bat and pretend it's the real deal. You could also draw some frets on, and nail a volume knob on

 

[Mofo-Kang]

Small man syndrome...very popular in Ireland..you know the whole "fighting Irish" thing? It's no mere stereotype.

[man walks into a bookstore]

Man: Do you have "101 Ways To Start A Fight"?

Clerk: Er...by...?

Man: An Irish gentleman whose name eludes me.

(from the Monty Python Booksellers sketch, ofc)