Best song opening lines...

[Phalex]

"Smell like a brewery, look like a tramp, aint got a quarter, got a postage stamp" Tom Waits - Pasties and a G string

 

[sarcastro83]

The entire muffin man speech by Frank Zappa.

 

[fishtx]

"arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoop of a fully charged icing annointment utensil...he "coots" forth a quarter ounce green rosette "near the summit of a dense but radiant muffin" of his own design"...yada yada yada

 

[jmorbita]

"I've been working on a cocktail called grounds for divorce"

"We had the drive and time on our hands
One little room and the biggest of plans.
The days were shaping up,
Frosty and bright.
Perfect weather to fly."
I've been listening quite a lot to elbow's last album the seldom seen kid..

 

[sarcastro83]

"arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoop of a fully charged icing annointment utensil...he "coots" forth a quarter ounce green rosette of his own design"...yada yada yada

that's the one.

 

[jady]

"Why does it hurt when I pee?" - Frank Zappa

 

[fishtx]

You could go all night listing Zappa tunes with killer opening lines...

 

[sarcastro83]

You could go all night listing Zappa tunes with killer opening lines...

completely...



and for all the punks there is always "1,2,3,4!!!" from any given Ramones song...

 

[MakiSupaStar]

"Daddy what does regret mean?
Well son the funny thing about regret is that it's better to regret something you have done than to regret something you haven't.
By the way, if you see your mom this weekend, would you be sure to tell her...

SATAN!"

Butthole Surfers - Sweatloaf

 

[RED5]

"well the last bus is gone. Or maybe I'm wrong, It just doesn't exist" Richard Thompson,"Walking the Long Mile Home" On second thought? Anything by Tom Waits.

 

[Hoover]

the radio DJ voiceover that opens Mr. Bungle's "The Girls Of Porn"


"Okay, all you pus-sucking mother****ers out there,
It's time to win a chance to butt-bang your daughter's tight virgin cherry ass to caller number
SIX-SIX-SIX"

 

[fishtx]

Billy was a Mountain...Ethel was a tree growing off of his shoulder...

 

[cdef]

"Johnny's in the basement mixin' up the medicine,
I'm on the pavement, thinkin' 'bout the government"

- Bob Dylan, Subterranean Homesick Blues

 

[ReedSpacer]

Oh the night came undone like a party dress
And fell at her feet in a beautiful mess

- Gillian Welch, Barroom Girls

 

[Kimpini]

"Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day"

Pink Floyd- "Time"
Depressing, but I love the song

 

[Ali O]

"Inflamation of the foreskin, reminds me of your smile."
Monty Python - Medical Love Song.
Makes me laugh every time anyway.

 

[sarcastro83]

the sample from the movie Shogun Assassin as the opener to GZA's Liquid Swords.

 

[Benjamin Strange]

"No life 'til leather/ We're gonna kick some ass tonight"
- Metallica

Best/worst opening line from the first song from the first album of any band ever. I dare you to come up with something equally stupid/brilliant.

 

[Gard]

To continue the brilliance of FZ's lyrical genius:

"Cosmik Debris"

The Mystery Man came over
An' he said: "I'm outa-site!"
He said, for a nominal service charge,
I could reach nervonna t'nite
If I was ready, willing 'n able
To pay him his regular fee
He would drop all the rest of his pressing affairs
And devote His Attention to me

 

[cdef]

"It's high time for a walk on the real side
Let's admit the bastards beat us
I move to dissolve the corporation
In a pool of margaritas"

- Steely Dan: Everything Must Go