Crossdressing and bandmates.

[ZBirdV8]

It's just something I enjoy doing. If you want to get weird about that's on you guys.

What I'm asking is assuming somebody in your band was a crossdresser, how would you like them to break it to you? As in I desire to do so on stage.

 

[Gravedigger Dav]

Wouldn't have a problem with it except on stage. As there is a social stigma attached to it, it could drive away customers and club owners.
Social stigmas are not always right or fair, they just are.

 

[shawshank72]

Rock it out I say.
But others may not see it the same way.

 

[dreamadream99]

I would find it easier if I were told about, rather than shown it.

 

[4StringTheorist]

Depends heavily on your bandmates' attitudes to such things. If I'm your bandmate, just tell me. I'm down with it and you'll get some mascara from me next time your birthday rolls around.

 

[Lobster11]

I would want you to sit down with me and our other bandmates, in private, and tell us all about it. But if the way you did it was to surprise us on stage at a gig, I'd be pissed and probably want to boot you out of the band -- not for cross-dressing, but for being unprofessional.

 

[JohnMCA72]

Form an (early) Alice Cooper tribute band!

 

[wintremute]

I would want you to sit down with me and our other bandmates, in private, and tell us all about it. But if the way you did it was to surprise us on stage at a gig, I'd be pissed and probably want to boot you out of the band -- not for cross-dressing, but for being unprofessional.

Yeah, it has to a private, mature, adult conversation.

Whether or not anyone is cool about it being on stage would be like other band situations, and is going to vary greatly from band to band. Some bands have rules about no drinking before or during the gig, some don't care. Some have strict dress codes, others wear shorts (gasp!). Some are 100% anti-drug, some just party hard. Some say play the song 100% the way it was recorded, others say just wing it.

Also, musicians are known for dressing crazy, being flamboyant, being different, calling attention to themselves, etc. Cross-dressing isn't really that out there, and it's been done for years and years.

OP, what's your band situation? What's the vibe you're getting right now? Do you think you'll get shot down? Do you think you'll get support? Do you think no one will care either way?

 

[hrodbert696]

For some people it's a joke or a performance, for others it's an identity and a lifestyle. @TBird1958 is part of a whole cross-dressed band, and from what I gather it's a hell of a show. But stage wear is very much a matter of the band's identity and concept, and not just a matter for each individual to do whatever they feel like. If it fits with the band schtick, then go for it. If it's just you doing it just because you want to do it, it would be unprofessional and warrant replacing you if you insisted on it.

 

[s0c9]

Yeah, it has to a private, mature, adult conversation.

Well, that discussion is not going to happen with most musicians then!

 

[David Jayne]

In the right type of band it would be awesome and would attract additional fans. In the wrong type of band...... Not so much.

 

[Callused Finger]

Country band with a weekly Saturday gig?

 

[RustyAxe]

I don't think that would go over too good in my country band ... or in the venues I play. I'd expect there'd be trouble. But you know YOUR band and audience better than I do.

 

[Thor]

Well, that discussion is not going to happen with most musicians then!

I was going to move the thread to Band Management, but after that lmfao I'll leave it here. Tbird's band is on youtube, I'll see if I can find a link.

 

[Salicete]

If they knew it before you were hired, or before they joined you, whichever the case may be, then all is fair, but if they didn't, it would not be fair to perform so attired unless they all bought-in on it.

That is not a commentary on cross-dressing; rather, it addresses meeting expectations that were previously set out.

 

[Thor]

There you go!

 

[S-Bigbottom]

Pics or it does not happen.

 

[geoff_in_nc]

If you want to cross dress on your own time, then more power to you I say. But a good band is a team, and a good player knows when to do what's right for the team. "Right" could be dresses and stilettos, or cargo shorts and flip-flops. The band needs to come to a group decision and agreement.

 

[Icemanaroonie]

You seem to be into metal/punk, so you could probably get away with it on stage.

 

[Thor]

I agree with Salicete above. A working band is show biz. It's entertainment. Usually the dress style is part of the show, whether is tie-dye for a Dead cover band, boots and hats in a country band, random casual wear or whatever the band agrees is appropriate.

I tend to dress carefully when I am on stage and project a professional image. Your clothes make a statement, use that to your advantage. I like the audience to know I am a performer as well as a musician.

In your case, you should discuss what you would like to wear on stage for a live gig with your bandmates. The exception is on Halloween when anything goes...