Do women mind being called girls?

[Funky Ghost]

I use lady. I guess I'm an odd duck like that. I never really thought about it before but for young girls It's usually little lady as the differentiation. Lady for everyone else of the female persuasion with the occasional gal thrown in when talking to the guys about gals

 

[58kites]

To me, the male equivalent of "girl" is "guy".....which you hear all the time.

Boy = Girl
Guy = Gal
Man = Woman
Sir = Ma'am (Madam is kind of a dead term)
Dude = Chick ..?

The reason you hear Guy and Girl is because a man does not want to be called a boy and men are given more respect than women as a rule, I don't like that fact but it's true.

Honey and sweetie, said to a person who is not your honey and sweetie, is a way to notate that you are older and the adult in the situation and to point towards your superior position.

Yes sir and yes ma'am have become terms that somebody uses when they are in a position of serving the other person and it is impersonal and rarely meant as a true term of respect, it is used when a person is trying to be formal and respectful, but nobody really likes to be called sir or ma'am by another person these days, it is like calling someone...stranger I don't know or care about .

 

[guy n. cognito]

Boy = Girl
Guy = Gal
Man = Woman
Sir = Ma'am (Madam is kind of a dead term)

The reason you hear Guy and Girl is because a man does not want to be called a boy and men are given more respect than women as a rule, I don't like that fact but it's true.

Honey and sweetie, said to a person who is not your honey and sweetie, is a way to notate that you are older and the adult in the situation and to point towards your superior position.

Yes sir and yes ma'am has become terms that somebody uses when they are in a position of serving the other person and it is impersonal and rarely meant as a true term of respect, it is used when a person is trying to be formal and respectful, but nobody really likes to be called sir or ma'am by another person these days, it is like calling someone...stranger I don't know or care about .

I missed those definitions in the rule book....

 

[58kites]

I missed those definitions in the rule book....

Say what you want about rule book...just trying to list (or point out) equivalent terms.
This stuff becomes pretty clear the minute you are willing to admit that these unequal terms are used by men the world over.
It's really funny, men hate to be told that they are doing it ...which is understandable because most men mean no offense by it, it is mostly a habit of speech they have unconsciously picked up.

Guy is a term for an adult male.
Girl is a term for a non adult female.

 

[guy n. cognito]

Say what you want about rule book...just trying to suggest equal terms.
Guy is a term for an adult male.
Girl is a term for a non adult female.

So, if a woman says to you "have fun with the boys" do you get offended?

 

[bholder]

I had a girlfriend once who took offense at the term "girlfriend". She didn't like "ladyfriend" any better though. And merely "friend" didn't seem to me to indicate the status of the relationship properly. We didn't last very long after said discussion.

 

[guy n. cognito]

I had a girlfriend once who took offense at the term "girlfriend". She didn't like "ladyfriend" any better though. And merely "friend" didn't seem to me to indicate the status of the relationship properly. We didn't last very long after said discussion.

I wonder how some people function....

 

[bholder]

I wonder how some people function....

I constantly wonder how I manage to function well enough to not get locked up....

 

[Stewie26]

What the woman in the video is saying is true, slave owners called their man slaves boy for a reason, calling grown women girls is a similar thing. Your wife and her girlfriends can call each other girls all they want, it is not the same as grown men referring to them as girls or chicks.
If anybody doubts this, start calling your male friends boy and see how well that goes over.
"Hey boy, how's it going?" as opposed to "Hey man, how's it going?"
Women don't refer to a good looking man as a boy unless the man (and usually the woman) are in their early 20's.
Some young women will say things like "We're going out to look for hot boys tonight", but that is a very different thing than referring to grown women as girls all the time.
It is condescending and I'm pretty sure the majority of women do care.
Lots of women get immune to it because it happens constantly, but they would prefer men did not give small signals that would suggest they are superior.
Unfortunately, there are a lot of social customs that give mixed signals, so men can easily be confused about the difference between holding a door open and some other custom like shaking hands as opposed to a hug at meeting a woman.
I know this stuff is true because I have been the employer of (nothing but) hundreds of young to middle aged women in the last 10 years, and I have been told in great detail what they think about lots of things.

Perhaps there is a big culture language difference from where we live. I grew up and live near the beaches here is SoCal and our speak here is very casual. Just the other day I mentioned to my wife that the boys are coming up Sunday afternoon for a jam session. It has nothing to do with slave owners from a 150 years ago. In fact, in my case, the expression means I am close to these musicians and it is more of a term of comradery with them. Just sayin.

 

[58kites]

So, if a woman says to you "have fun with the boys" do you get offended?

Of course not, it is a term used to notate a group of guy friends, and often the statement you quoted would be a familiar woman speaking to a familiar man (husband maybe) about a group of familiar men.
Not the same thing as referring to a woman you point to or don't know as a girl, which men do very, very often.

 

[DiabolusInMusic]

Odd, because it bugs me when I get called sweetie in public by gals I don't know.




I won't stop either, especially when the commercial is throwing her looks at you.
It's the whole point of the ad, that you can apparently score with her if you have unlimited data, and her looks are a huge factor.

BTW, you won. Yes, you're better than me.
Wasn't that your point?

No, my point was actually to prove people are all equal and deserve the same kind of respect. If you are offended at people calling you "sweetie" you should tell them. Most people aren't insulted at the idea of respecting other people. Nobody wins when people degrade other people.

Additionally, the fact you seem to think it is acceptable to reduce women's to objects highlights my initial post. Where the hell did you think this thread would end? It was started by somebody who clearly has no interest in gender equality. If anything, this thread was started to further reduce women and somehow justify people continuing calling women "girls" in professional settings.

 

[guy n. cognito]

Of course not, it is a term used to notate a group of guy friends, and often the statement you quoted would be a familiar woman speaking to a familiar man (husband maybe) about a group of familiar men.
Not the same thing as referring to a woman you point to or don't know as a girl, which men do very, very often.

You made a lot of assumptions to make that distinction. You would seem to infer, that context is criticizing the word "girl" is everything.....

 

[58kites]

Perhaps there is a big culture language difference from where we live. I grew up and live near the beaches here is SoCal and our speak here is very casual. Just the other day I mentioned to my wife that the boys are coming up Sunday afternoon for a jam session. It has nothing to do with slave owners from a 150 years ago. In fact, in my case, the expression means I am close to these musicians and it is more of a term of comradery with them. Just sayin.

The culture in Austin Texas is very much the same as California only much more friendly, I'm from New York and the difference is shocking.
As I'm sure you are well aware, Austin is pretty metropolitan and as progressive as anywhere in the country, and veeeeeery casual.
People speak with lots of very similar terms these days in this country, and your terms are exactly the same as my terms.
Calling a group of male friends "the boys" and calling a group of female friends "the girls" is pretty universal all over the United States and elsewhere, ...and you know this.

 

[Killed_by_Death]

If you are offended at people calling you "sweetie" you should tell them.

I'm not that easily offended, but I find it weird when someone I don't know calls me by an endearing term.

Where the hell did you think this thread would end?

Where do you get off using that kind of language with me?
I suggest you practice what you preach!
and I quote:

"people are all equal and deserve the same kind of respect"

If anything, this thread was started to further reduce women and somehow justify people continuing calling women "girls" in professional settings.

I think you need to listen to the video again, because you are WAY off the mark.

 

[Stewie26]

The culture in Austin Texas is very much the same a California only much more friendly.
People speak all the same in this country these days, and your terms are exactly the same as my terms.
It's amazing how touchy men are when you point this stuff out.
Calling a group or male friends "the boys" and calling a group of female friends "the girls" is very universal all over the United States and elsewhere, ...and you know this.

Not really. The beach city natives are a complete subculture compared to the rest of California. I grew up in the surf culture.

 

[58kites]

You made a lot of assumptions to make that distinction.
You would seem to infer, that context is criticizing the word "girl" is everything.....

Not sure what you mean, but I don't think I made a lot of assumptions.
I can't make sense of your second sentence here, please clarify.

 

[murphy]

Firstly...i actually like to be called "Sir"....I like feeling respected

Do you guys remember the Hamer Cruise bass ads when they came out....Naked woman hugging the jazz bass and a love letter in the script?

I was so offended...I wrote to Bass Player mag complaining.....It eleminated all women bass players and seemed so sexist

Perhaps I was being too rigid when I was young, but I was shocked that in 1996? That kind of marketing was being used in our enlightened age of equality...HA!!!!!

 

[Killed_by_Death]

What kind of pickups are in that Hamer?
I dig the bridge!


Wait, there's a woman in the photo?

 

[DiabolusInMusic]

I'm not that easily offended, but I find it weird when someone I don't know calls me by an endearing term.




Where do you get off using that kind of language with me?
I suggest you practice what you preach!




I think you need to listen to the video again, because you are WAY off the mark.

Admittedly, I didn't watch the video. I just listened to it now. She has a great point. Why are women constantly referred to as girls? Men are rarely referred to as boys. Yes, we can all find examples of it happening but, on the whole, women are reduced to girls regularly while men are rarely reduced to boys. This is a very real societal issue. I thought her point about "the girl at the bank" or "the girl at the bar" was fantastic. I would imagine everybody in this thread has said something similar and not even noted it as incorrect. The fact is that it is incorrect and women should be referred to as women. Contrary to what some folks think, basic respect isn't too much to ask.

 

[JGbassman]

Wow, how Silly and petty has our culture became. Everyone is so sensitive these days, and I find it utterly stupid.

To have a female become offended when called a girl is utterly comical in my book. If it was done in a respectful manner, I cannot reason why this would bother someone. I have been on many "boys night out" or "hanging with the boys" on more than one occasion over the age of 18, and it's never bothered me once. Never. Take that and put it in your sensitive pipe and smoke it. (gee, I hope I didn't offend any sensitive people by saying that) A proper man or woman was taught and raised seeing and giving respect to others. That might be old school these days, so blame my mother for that.

If I call someone Sir or Ma'am, it's done out of being raised to properly respect another person. I additionally spent many years in the military, and that was how an officer was addressed. I sure didn't seem to find as many sensitive people in the military either. Respect was earned, and was given as well. As a senior NCO, I had to get in someone's rump on occasion, and if you were too sensitive to deal with it, then it was time for you to get out of the service. My job was to train you or keep you at a certain standard where during a war your sensitive rump might be saved due to my training I gave you.

In formal situations, a person will be addressed by either a sir or ma'am, based on my perceived gender. (If you are a female and look like a guy and I accidentally address you as such, suck it up buttercup and deal with it due to your diverse look, I meant no disrespect)

The women I know are addressed as gals or girls, and the men as guys or boys. I have yet to hear any one of my friends being so freaking overly sensitive that this would have bothered them. Of course if something so silly bothered them, they wouldn't be in my circle anyway.

Our culture is based on the women (men too) seemingly all craving to be 20 something, and every type of marketing out there is geared to this. People love to be guessed as younger as they are, so why a female would be offended by being called a girl is not only silly, but sort of a double standard. If they do complain, just reply " sorry, I thought a xx year old woman might appreciate being called a girl wouldn't bother you". Be sure to add an additional 10-15 years on their age, and see what kind of look you get. No doubt you will be corrected with their actual age, or maybe a little less. This of course reinforces my belief that both genders wish to look, feel, and act younger than they actually are. Of course there comes a time where they stop giving a rip, and I'd guess being called a girl or a boy wouldn't be that big of a deal to them either.

So in conclusion, I feel that if the proper respect is given when addressing the other person, I see absolutely no problem with it. If a person would take the time to tell me it bothered them, I would respect their wishes as well and not address them as such. While I would feel this is completely silly, I was taught respect of others.

If a person is so sensitive to this or other common titles, I'd say it's time to toughen up a bit.

I'm sure the politically correct police will stop by and let me know of all my shortcomings, but meh, I really don't care. It's my opinion. Deal with it.

Edited to say I didn't watch the video either, because I could tell it was full of politically correct feel good nonsense.