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Got fired. Band politics. VENTING.

#22
Munroe said:
What's worse: being fired due to bad musicianship/work ethic, or being fired because people/someone doesn't like you?

This is a vent thread. I just got fired from a gig for the first time.

It wasn't due to my musicianship. I do a good job. I played on the wrong side of band politics. Its a long story.

Basically, a year ago I agreed to join an original rock band. It was quickly apparent that the level of commitment required wasn't one I wanted to give, so I had a sit-down meeting with the members and told them I want to quit. At the time, they seemed to understand, and I agreed that I would stay on-board for a few months until they could find a new bassist. I thought it was a very civil compromise, as I could have just left at that moment if I wanted.

It turns out they weren't really cool with it.

The thing is, I knew these musicians through doing gigs in my city. On the side, I did a Rock cover gig with the same lineup of the original band, and a separate R&B cover gig that happens to have the same drummer and the lead guitarist.

Anyway, after six months, they finally found my replacement for the original band. However, it turns out the lead guitarist (with a history of vindictive behavior) had been secretly demanding for months that I be fired from ALL THE GIGS and replaced with whatever bassist they manage to find. The mantra is "all the gigs have to have the same personnel".

See, the lead guitarist (shred guy) has a massive ego that is easily bruised and apparently is offended that anyone wouldn't want to be in his original project. He is also extremely demanding and often threatens to quit if minor requests aren't met. Him and I often feuded. He's even offended that I don't hang out after shows and get drunk, even though I told him multiple times I have f***ing Crohn's disease and am not supposed to drink or smoke.

Everyone except me and the drummer automatically go along with whatever he says. Apparently the drummer, who I had a long history with, advocated for me for a few months, but he ultimately gave in to the demands of the guitarist in order to stay in the group.

Anyway, I'm quite bitter about the whole thing, as I now have to make up for a lot of lost income on really short notice, and the reason for firing me was SO PETTY.

God, I HATE MUSICIANS SOMETIMES. Had I had known I was going to get **** on in the end, I would have never offered to help them out!
Click to expand...

That's not the way to quit. You didn't do it right. :eyebrow:

Once you've announced your intentions to leave, you're already on borrowed time. To be professional about it, you can offer to stay on for another couple weeks or so, perhaps as long as four weeks maximum, in order to fulfill a commitment to play a gig. But that's IT. Much longer than that and you're paying opportunity costs that you can't afford to pay (i.e. missed potential gigs with other players, etc.). Meanwhile, your continued presence in the soon-to-be former band potentially makes you a target for any member who happens to have a vindictive streak...such as you already knew was the case with your guitarist! :eyebrow:

And the thing about "automatically go(ing) along" with the guitarist's demands? That's a whole other issue... :rolleyes:

Sorry, but you allowed this to happen - whether out of an excess of accommodation, or out of fear to offend, or dependency upon the gig money - whatever. Should have anticipated repercussions in the other band(s), soon as you'd announced your intentions to leave the original project - especially since the "leader" is a vindictive douchebag. Ideally, should have had a replacement gig lined up - or nearly lined up.

Live and learn...

MM
 
#25
Munroe:

Congratulations! You freed yourself from the ego-freakazoid guitarist.

You hit the flush handle on the drama queen, and you are now free to live your life out from under his lameness. How liberating that must feel! :bassist:

He can continue to live in his little world of himself and bask in his wonderfulness while you move on and do something a helluva lot more productive that prioritizing the need to get drunk (what a loser!) :rollno:

Good job on ridding yourself of the dead weight! :cool:
 
#26
Hey thanks guys for the (mostly) supportive comments :) I do appreciate it.

I want to respond to a couple of things I've heard:

"You shouldn't have joined the original band in the first place"

- True. That was a huge mistake. Honestly, I thought the band was just going to be a "for fun" project. I didn't realize the other guys had intentions of becoming famous.

"I agree that all the bands should have the same personnel"

- The R&B gig is a completely separate show - separate style, set list, girl singer, new keyboardist added. I'm also one of those guys who studied the hell out of R&B bass, particularly Jamerson and Duck Dunn, and can play the lines pretty authentically. The guitarist is a shred rock musician. I helped found this particular gig. They didn't have the right to cheat me out of it just because I don't play bass in a separate hard rock band anymore.

"You shouldn't have stayed on in the band for so long"

- Yes, I agree. I should have quit within a month, if not immediately. That was a mistake.

Oh well, live and learn I guess. At least I saved up a few thousand dollars to get me by in case something like this ever happened, and I do have some teaching income on the side.

Thanks for the feedback/critiquing/support/criticism :bassist:
 
#27
Munroe said:
Hey thanks guys for the (mostly) supportive comments :) I do appreciate it.

Oh well, live and learn I guess. At least I saved up a few thousand dollars to get me by in case something like this ever happened, and I do have some teaching income on the side.

Thanks for the feedback/critiquing/support/criticism :bassist:
Click to expand...

Good thread Munroe,

Hopefully tbers that have upcoming auditions and offers to join bands will think about some of the pitfalls any of can find ourselves in.

"Do your homework and detective work on any band your thinking of joining. Save yourselves some headaches."

Blue
 
#28
Munjibunga said:
Even in ordinary employment, the most common reason people get fired is because the boss doesn't like you. I don't know if Mr. Shredder is the official boss of the band, but he is at least the de facto boss. You may need to learn how to play politics a little better.

Frankly, if you said you were going to quit one band, I'd've replaced you at the very earliest convenience. If I didn't like you, I'd've replaced you in the other bands, too. While Mr. Shredder may be a douchenozzle, I see his point. He'd rather have someone who will bow to him in all bands. The drummer acquiesced to his position and is still in the band. You didn't and you're not.
Click to expand...

Totally agree with you: I had to face that issue last year, I knew that I wouldn't fit the band after a few rehersals. Playing badly, poor atmosphere, etc... the BL phoned me the day after we had a cool and honest dial, and I told him I could find him a guy to replace me in a few days, he enjoyed, now he's gigging with another guy, and we are still on good terms.

ALWAYS be honest first, and express what you want without compromising yourself. If you see that something's missing in the deal after a few weeks (not even a month), go away, and quick !!

The right band is the one that kicks it at the first rehersal, not less....
 
#30
It sucks. It isn't fair. It's difficult to tell who's to blame. Welcome to band life - for many bands anyway.

I played with the same "core" of guys for a long time. Jazz, pop, funk, R&B, etc. There came a time where one band was gigging more than I wanted, I had a disagreement with the leader (which I didn't handle well at all) and I was done. I quit that band, played the last confirmed gig (NYE) with one of the other's and that was it. They found a new bass player for the bands and on they went.

I do fill in/sub work with them and that's great. We all play at church, it's all good. We moved on from the ugly disagreement. I have chosen to stay home more, they gig. It's the way it is. I much prefer the way it is now....for now. When my family life changes in a few years, I may be ready for more. We'll see where everyone's at then. WHo knows how things will be in 10 years.
 
#31
Got laid-off from my dayjob after busting my butt there for 6 years. Was it partially politics, (office) Absolutely, combined with the poor economy.
All Politics suck, guess my point is a band should be FUN for me if I even sense BS like this occurring I take a walk. Can get f*ked over all you like from politics at your dayjob (assumming I find another in this Fubared economy)
 
#33
obimark said:
Got laid-off from my dayjob after busting my butt there for 6 years. Was it partially politics, (office) Absolutely, combined with the poor economy.
All Politics suck, guess my point is a band should be FUN for me if I even sense BS like this occurring I take a walk. Can get f*ked over all you like from politics at your dayjob (assumming I find another in this Fubared economy)
Click to expand...

I got fired from a day job 'cause I was a little too much jazz pop and they were a little too much country and western/death metal slash all other humans of not the right subset kinda folk.

It worked out well if for no other reason.
 
#34
In one of my earlier bands I was jamming with some guys older than me. The guitarist was really good, so I stayed. Drummer sucked.

Drummer could play a straight 4/4 beat all day perfect. But that was all he did. Luckily he hired some administrators for our band! Drummer's Wife(manager) and her friend(Publicist).

We hadn't even played a show yet, so I don't know why we need a publicist. But after watching us play through the 3 songs we had at the time. Publicist told them that I HAD TO GO. This was based solely on me having white legs. Uhm. I'm white....???

Basically, people in general can be really stupid. You can either live with it and sacrifice your time and dignity if you think that there is something greater to be gained, or get the ____ out.

I'm glad I stayed as long as I did because I ended up getting to be very good friends with the guitarist and was in a few bands with him after that. Never to look back at that "drummer".
 

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