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How to approach a touchy subject

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#21
Michael Henson said:
This.

Sounds like you're more worried about your image's (yours and the drummer's) being tainted in front of "the ladies." IMHO, it's narcissistic to be playing shows with your shirt off anyway but the disdain you're showing your band mates ups the ante on that. You don't take into account how your other "shirted" band members feel and show no appreciation for the fact that they've allowed to run around the stage half naked with out (apparently) saying anything...Like previous posters have said your attitude is emasculating, conceited, and annoying. If I were one of your fat, hairy band mates and you approached me about keeping my shirt on after a high energy gig where I just thought we were all letting our hair down and having a blast, I'd probably quit on the spot.

On the other hand, I realize that I could be reading a lot into this and that you're actually a really laid back, down-to-earth guy that wants what is best for the band...In that case, an all shirts, all the time policy would look like the best option to me. Especially since it sounds like you guys have a good thing going...It'd be a shame to ruin that because you'd rather not play with a shirt on. All IMHO, FWIW, etc.

:D:hiding:
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whoa... i love my band mates and the band as a whole ... your right dont read THAT much into it. i asked an opinion and even suggested in my original post that i was in the wrong, and wanted other peoples feedback.... im not offended by them AT ALL.... im concerned about the bands image. PEOPLE in the crowd can be and ARE harsh .... i want people to come see the music thats all. and as i said before, this is not a front to "get chicks" im perfectly satisfied living with my son and his mother. sorry if i annoyed you
 
#24
lowgun said:
whoa... i love my band mates and the band as a whole ... your right dont read THAT much into it. i asked an opinion and even suggested in my original post that i was in the wrong, and wanted other peoples feedback.... im not offended by them AT ALL.... im concerned about the bands image. PEOPLE in the crowd can be and ARE harsh .... i want people to come see the music thats all. and as i said before, this is not a front to "get chicks" im perfectly satisfied living with my son and his mother. sorry if i annoyed you
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Not annoyed at all. Didn't mean to come across that way...that's just the perception I jump to when I see people with their shirts off in situations where it's not the norm I guess. Obviously, based on your responses, I am wrong in this instance and you are a triple threat...a bassist with abs and a clear, level head. :D
 
#25
if you're in a hardcore band, or maybe an already-famous glam metal band, you can look cool playing with your shirt off.

Any other genre and you come off like that goofy drummer in the first Hootie & The Blowfish video.

hootie.gif
 
#26
I've always taken great care of my body and am quite comfortable with being scantly clad in a lot of settings, and I still dislike taking my shirt off at a show (awkwardly, even at the crowds request), mainly because I have seen bands that do it for a blatant, silly attempt at sex appeal... But if it is truly in the heat of the moment because you like to play that way, then rock it, and it shouldn't bother you when the other guys are feelin' it too. Hell, why stop at shirts... rock it all the way to the RHCP socks!
 
#27
^^^^ @ michael henson) thanks for that man. i got a little upset when i saw that, i reread my original post and can see in hindsight why im getting this kind of response from people. its not how i meant it to come across.

and i do appreciate the feedback that you have contributed
 
#28
Michael Henson said:
...just the perception I jump to when I see people with their shirts off in situations where it's not the norm I guess.
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OP, I'm not saying anything about you personally, but I do tend to have the same impression in those situations. I agree with Michael that at first blush, it seems a little on the ego-driven side.

Good luck with everything.
 
#32
Here's the thing. No matter what you do, there are going to be some people put off by it and others will be entertained.

If you guys are trying to be classy, put shirts on and dress up. If you are anti-classy, keep doing what you are doing and consider taking it up a notch. Just, yaknow, keep the pants on, please... there are laws... But be true to yourselves and your true audience will appreciate you.
 
#34
Nev375 said:
Here's the thing. No matter what you do, there are going to be some people put off by it and others will be entertained.

If you guys are trying to be classy, put shirts on and dress up. If you are anti-classy, keep doing what you are doing and consider taking it up a notch. Just, yaknow, keep the pants on, please... there are laws... But be true to yourselves and your true audience will appreciate you.
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A nuanced and fair opinion in the band management boards? No way. I just can't believe it!
 
#37
Well, if you want to continue in this vein, fire the other two guys and replace them with models and sequencers.

Otherwise, deal with keeping your shirt on. You can't without making things worse explain why you're such a stud that you can keep your shirt on, but they are too ugly. You will just end up making an ass of yourself, which in my opinion you already are.
 
#38
Nev375 said:
Here's the thing. No matter what you do, there are going to be some people put off by it and others will be entertained.

If you guys are trying to be classy, put shirts on and dress up. If you are anti-classy, keep doing what you are doing and consider taking it up a notch. Just, yaknow, keep the pants on, please... there are laws... But be true to yourselves and your true audience will appreciate you.
Click to expand...

thanks Nev!
 
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