I got a story and a question.

[fenderhutz]

I have a wife with 50,000 in school loans, a 255,000 mortgage, 20,000 car loan, and other assorted bills and I have a bum ankle.

Anyone want my paypal account? I could use the cash.

Seriously though, if he is THAT hard up for cash there are plenty of gov't funded programs to get him healthy. Still seems like the family asking for money for themselves rather than his surgery.

 

[fenderhutz]

It's the same guy.

He is pointing out the fact the guy has gone from aggressor to victim, you never know, his affliction may have caused him to change. The poster was making a quote for thought.

 

[Jeremy Crockett]

He is pointing out the fact the guy has gone from aggressor to victim, you never know, his affliction may have caused him to change. The poster was making a quote for thought.

Yeah, I thought about prefacing my response with "barring a complete change of heart".

We have this romantic notion that illness or grave injury ALWAYS changes people for the better. This comes from a steady diet of movies and afternoon television.

Most people are who they are even after such monumental events. My mother-in-law's husband is a great example. Just last month he had a heart attack that the MD's lovingly referred to as a "WidowMaker". 80% fatality rate. He was in the hospital for about 3 days and still is the same man he was before the attack.

 

[Pilgrim]

My question is should I put my money in that can?

My answer is simple. No. He didn't earn it.

You can say that attitude is not Christian, and my answer is twofold: (1) Who cares? (2) Sez who? You can assert anything you want to about being "Christian" by quoting the right things. I could quote 'Eye for an eye" or 'Reap what you have sown" to justify complete indifference to this guy's condition.

But I know you're not indifferent, you have some empathy for his condition, but you have enough reason to dislike him that you're not motivated to contribute. That's OK and well justified as far as I'm concerned.

He didn't earn it. Not from you. Some people get sick and die, some live - them's the breaks, life can be really tough. Victim, aggressor, I don't care....he still made your life miserable. You aren't doing anything to hurt him, but you have NO reason to help him.

I worked with a gent who made my life miserable for three years, but who got melanoma and died. His brain basically fell apart. I didn't even go to the funeral, although I did sign the card that went around - because it was for his wife, not him. I've never felt bad about not attending the funeral; his death was a relief to me and I told my wife that. She understood and agreed, and she's one of the kindest, most thoughtful people I've ever met.

 

[Atoz]

I guess you put some money in. If that made you feel better, then hey - that's great. I don't know if you felt some internal "pressure" just because you know who the guy is... I mean, how many of those jars do you not put money into on a weekly basis?

By all accounts, this guy was a total jerk to you for many years, and if you don't normally donate to these kinds of things in the first place, then not giving him money now that he's sick is a perfectly acceptable thing to do IMHO.

I mean, it's not like mailing him a baseball glove or a hook. That might be considered spiteful.