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Let's spread some musical misinformation

Fanned frets are so-named because they are electrified, with ultra-high voltage, and will only remain viable if kept at room temperature by mechanical cooling. Without constant fanning, these instruments have a tendency to spontaneously combust, burst into flames, which most often inflicts upon the musician severe burns and sometimes even electrocution and death. Goths love fanned frets, for this reason.
 
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Typical outfit of a kazoo repairman
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