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Losing a good singer really sucks...

Thanks for all the comments, everyone, I really love the TB community - I wish my local music scene had more down-to-earth attitudes like on here, heh heh :)

We're gonna keep practicing (we're actually a 4 piece without her) and audition singers. Thing is, both my guitar players are pretty good singers but they're too petrified of singing leads and prefer to pick up harmonies :)

Josh -I told her she really oughta move to Austin over Chicago.... I love Chicago (my sister lives there and I'm originally from Milwaukee) but at least Austin isn't COLD.....
 
Yesterday afternoon, after about a year of my band (see my signature below-haven't bothered to change it yet) busting its collective butt writing and performing together, our singer announces that she's quitting. She said the music we're doing is never what she intended to do - she wants to do something "more modern" and "less guitar oriented" (that's code for "more like what you'd hear on an Apple commercial." :rolleyes:) She also wants to move to Chicago because Omaha is "a good place to raise a family" (subtext: no fun, lame, boring, etc.)

This was a bombshell because we just pressed 1000 copies of our debut album in May and had a very successful CD release part (search for our band name on Youtube for footage.) We had a buzz going, have our stuff on CDBaby and ITunes, and practically a full follow-up album of even better songs that we'd already started to record. Now it's all going down the toilet.

Now she said she'd be OK with us using her material, including lyrics, and continuing with a new singer and the same band name. But none of us really feel right about that. She also said she's not going anywhere til at least May and she's fine continuing til then. But that's kind of like continuing to have s*x after you've been dumped - it's kind of a waste of time.

The good news is we have a really solid 4-piece band, we just need a singer. The hard part is finding a new singer who is not only really good (they have big shoes to fill) but also has a personality that meshes with our band chemistry (probably the best of any band I've played in.) So the search begins... we're being pretty picky - it's really hard to find talented singers in this town. We're leaving it open to either gender, but we want someone who is not only a killer singer, but also has great stage presence, previous band experience, and who can write lyrics and melodies, and that's pretty hard to find... :hmm: :help:

Real sorry to hear the situation. Ones like yours which I've experienced over and over again with "the" lead singer have more or less helped drive me to want to be the lead singer in ANY band I join or am involved with in the future unless I am demonstrably in a "sideman" role for a big enough artist for me to overlook it- aka, major regional or national talent.

I'm not a control freak, per se, but I feel like so much of my musical progress with a group (or of the group itself) relies on the whims or situation of a lead singer. I don't want control of other people's destinies, but I do want control of my own. And if nothing else, we all want stability. And if being "the" lead singer is a way to achieve it...

Maybe the people who I have played in bands with were not superlative lead singers or frontpeople, so perhaps that allows me to believe I can (if not immediately, but in time) do what they do at least as well as they did it, if not better. They did it. Why can't I?

In any event, such courses of action (I think I can do this as well, or better than that person) is a common thread in business, music, and so many other facets of life. Any you may do this same thing, sometime. I wasn't ready for it 10-15 years ago. Now I am.

Ultimately, I blame myself- not learning all the lead vocals proactively, and being ready to step into that role in the band when it became available or needed to be filled.

Anyway, some things, hopefully, to think about...
 
you know, a lot can happen between now and may. if i were you, i'd be taking names and sort of looking for a new singer, but i've banged girls i broke up with and liked it ;) so why not keep doing gigs until she bolts?
 
Losing any good bandmate is a bummer.

You know, there is a reason why the band I left in January did not last more than 2 gigs after that.

Could not find a bassist who could nail the material like I did, or if he could, would want to gig with them.

As for singers, just put an ad out, get auditionees lined up, one per hour, or even one per 45 minutes and get going.

Keep practicing without a singer or one of you singing as well as he can.

It will take time but if you're good, have gigs lined up, you'll have singers auditioning.

Expect some American Idol moments (I could tell you of a few).
 
I totally feel you.
The lead singer in my last band quit right after our CD release party. She and the guitarist were the founding members, and he didn't want to go on without her. So, there was no finding a new singer for us. Plus she kept all the CDs, I don't even have a copy. She pulled the same crap, I found out from the drummer, that she want's to do country. We were a funk/pop/rock band. She sent me a check for $93 dollars with a one line note. "here's your share of the band fund, you are a good bass player".

I'm in a coverband now that's just about ready to gig, and our singer quit. Same junk, he want's to do metal. Of course he was all about the material while we were working on it, then all of a sudden a change of heart. Singers suck.

Craigslist sucks too. Either they will not show up, or they will show up and completly stink. We found our new singer through networking, a friend of a friend sort of thing.

I think there's a lot of craigslist fantasy surfers, who don't have the guts to actually show up. They'll be all over the emails though, wasting your time.

Keep on going, don't let these ego maniac singers ruin your good thing. Plus learn to sing, we kept practicing with no singer. I did most of the lead singing, just to keep us moving forward. Now we have a great singer, who's way cooler then the last guy, and I'm back to harmony where I belong.
 
If you guys are really tight with each other and committed to sticking it out you should have your guitarists step up and do a co-lead singer thing. Re-arrange your songs so some of the main vocals are sung in harmony and switch it up between the two when it's solo vocals, sorta like Pink Floyd or Alice In Chains. It might not be as intimidating for them to do it that way. You could keep it going with people you know are in it for the long haul (at least until one of them gets a big head).
 
Yeah our guitar players both sang in the last band they were in. They were a great band, good singers, but neither of them had much of a stage presence and the singer we just lost had a GREAT stage presence.

Update: We MIGHT be getting the singer in my old band who is probably the best male singer in town. He has a huge range (from 90s grunge low to falsetto), good pitch, can emulate just about anyone's voice if he wants to for the occasional cover, very powerful voice and the exact same taste in music as the rest of us. He also has a lively stage presence and tons of charisma, and we all already know him. He's a natural fit, but here's the catch: I was in a band with him for years and it ended badly. Lots of personality clash and arguments. He and I are both sort of control freaks. That's why we sort of hesitated. HOWEVER - that was 3 years ago and I think a lot of that was to blame on the band dynamic at the time (different people.) I think with this new group it will be much better. I'm still hesitant but I want to see where it goes. I liken it to getting back together with an ex - you're cautious but excited at the same time. And you hope if it ended badly years ago that both parties have matured since then....:eyebrow:
 
my band recently lost a good female singer too

its not fun

mostly because i miss stering at her bottom

IMG_7332-2.jpg
 
Update # 2:

I think we're going to continue the same band with a new female singer. It's gonna be weird at first but I'm sure that's what Pink Floyd said when they hired Roger Waters (err, well, maybe not.) We're going to play one final show with our current/quitting singer on Oct 1 at a local casino, because it's a good gig and will be a fitting sendoff. But we've started looking for a new female singer. There are plenty of ladies who think they can sing, quite a few who actually CAN sing, but very few who know how to sing in tune over two guitars, bass, and drums...not to mention write good melodies, non-girly lyrics, etc... :hmm: ...but the search begins...