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my band played a show without me?!?!

#22
First get all your stuff out of there. Second, tell them you're clueless as to why they've replaced you and that you would like to know why since you thought everything was fine. Maybe they viewed some situation differently than you did. Either way you're out. Even if they say you are still in, you're out. There's no legit reason for them not telling you that you were out before the gig other than them being chicken.

The excuse that they were holding you in reserve in case the new player didn't work out may be true but it's not something you should be ok with. Try it with a girlfriend. Tell her "hey honey its no big deal. Yeah i went out with that other girl behind your back but the only reason i didn't tell you was in case she wouldn't put out. We're cool right baby?"
 
#24
I think it's time to start a new band. Or, if no other players are around, to learn the other instruments and record a full instrumental album. Bonus points if you can sing, too. Even more bonus points if you put your old band to shame.

But yeah, band drama iz no funz. Leave with everyone having a level of respect for each other.
 
#27
Deceptive little devils... Load your stuff up, give them the finger, smile, and move on to another band. It's one thing to not be available for a gig and have a replacement that you know about or recommended. Sounds like you're being replaced. Don't sweat it dude.
 
#28
Yeah, I'd go get my stuff and then let them know you didn't appreciate being replaced. It's not really worth your time though. If they are going to do stuff like that, you really don't want to play with them anyway. Why get caught up in asking why. If they didn't tell you already, they probably won't be honest with you when you ask.

Grab your gear.... Lesson learned.... find a band that appreciates you and what you have to offer.
 
#33
Yeah dude, screw that. They are looking to replace you, period. Bail right now. Get your stuff and move on. If they give you some excuse to make you stay it's only because they don't want to be completely without a bass player. They will boot you when they find another one. No way I would stay, regardless of what they had to say.
 
#37
You are probably already out of the band and don't even know it!
Do what these guys said, get all your stuff, and don't make a big fuss but move on. I wouldn't stick around and let them use you while they search for your replacement, but making a scene won't make things any better.
 
#40
How about playing it up like its ok then at the next gig in the middle of the first set stop playing, grab the mic and tell the audience what dicks they are, pack up your **** and leave.
I always say one good turn deserves another.
 

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