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Quitting a band sucks

#21
No band leader really, mostly equals I'd say. We all did little extras here and there. I did our poster and graphic design stuff as well as spreadsheets for tracking song history, etc.. I am sensitive, I do admit that, so while these are small issues it was just an accumulation of other little things here and there. I did try to stick it out and aired some grievances here and there and they mostly fell on deaf ears. I consider myself to be very patient and accommodating but at the end of the day it has to be fun and it just wasn't anymore.

Thanks for the varying opinions too, it helps to see things from different perspectives. Sometimes things just don't work out but I did learn a lot of new material and saw some new places so it had it's moments of greatness.
 
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#22
I had a situation like that, except it was a "producer" guy who was telling me all the time to turn down, turn down. couple of times, I turned off the volume on my amp, so was only in FOH. dude kept telling me to turn down. during soundcheck, I asked the FOH soundguy, from the stage, "hey, how's the bass volume ?" soundguy replies, "if you bring up your stage volume, it will balance a little more!"
Producer guy shook his head like everyone was all wrong.
I politely told him that he should stand next to FOH sound guy and give him advice on balancing the levels, not to me, as I was only in control of stage sound.
We did a few more gigs after that, but I wasn't gonna stick around for that kind of nonsense.
 
#25
smartinson said:
I've been in a band for almost a year now. They had fired their old bassist and brought me on to replace him for a show two weeks after they fired him. I filled in and it was good so I stayed on since then. It was fun, I was having a good time and was able to overlook little things. No biggie.

Their sound guy clearly didn't like me, I think because I pushed back a little at his suggestions? Not sure, but after that, after every show he always had a problem with my setup. Noisy, too much bass, too much treble, too much compression, etc... He pushed me too far and now I've resigned. I'm very sad about it because it was fun and music is my passion but I told myself I'd quit as soon as it wasn't fun. I'm mad at them, too, for ruining something I love.

I know it's best for my mental health but I'm still sad and mad about it. I just needed to vent this out to others that can hopefully relate. Thanks for listening.
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Is this a cover band or an originals band? Also, do you use a lot of different sounds during a gig? Do you boast your bass EQ sometimes for some songs then then add more treble/mid for others, or add distortion for some songs, or other effects?
 
#26
Joedog said:
I'm confused. Are you not going through the FOH?
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Yes, it was going to FOH as well as an amp on stage. This kind of set up was all new to me so maybe I just didn't understand what he was trying to tell me.

fjbass78 said:
Is this a cover band or an originals band? Also, do you use a lot of different sounds during a gig? Do you boast your bass EQ sometimes for some songs then then add more treble/mid for others, or add distortion for some songs, or other effects?
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It was a cover band. I wouldn't say I used a lot of sounds. Generally I had a compressor that was always on and a Q/Strip that was always on. For a couple of 80s songs I'd add chorus and for a couple of others I'd add some distortion. Other than those songs everything was left as-is.

This all sure could've been my fault too, definitely not trying to say it was 100% them or 100% the sound guy. Likely a general lack of communication skills that resulted in more frustrations than good sounds.
 
#28
smartinson said:
Yes, it was going to FOH as well as an amp on stage. This kind of set up was all new to me so maybe I just didn't understand what he was trying to tell me.



It was a cover band. I wouldn't say I used a lot of sounds. Generally I had a compressor that was always on and a Q/Strip that was always on. For a couple of 80s songs I'd add chorus and for a couple of others I'd add some distortion. Other than those songs everything was left as-is.

This all sure could've been my fault too, definitely not trying to say it was 100% them or 100% the sound guy. Likely a general lack of communication skills that resulted in more frustrations than good sounds.
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I agree communication can be difficult. We never had a dedicated sound guy, so that's nice that you did. If you keep this gig or end up moving on, it might a good idea to let sound guy know that you will use this effect for this song and this effect for the other. I'm thinking then he know how to react. Just a thought. Good luck to you which ever way you go. I'm sure it will work out!
 
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#30
If it's a no leader band than You are a co leader! I've never met a "sound man" in any capacity who's territory was MY sound or effects I use. Why are you so self effacing? How is it possible to feel so hassled by one person who is supposed to be there as a servant?

surly the band has something to say about your using effects.

The sound man sounds like a control freak and despot which stems from a personality disorder. Maybe not. I'm just suggesting possibilities.
 
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#34
There are three sides to every conflict: your side their side, and the truth.

Sound guys are hired to make bands sound good at FOH for the pleasure of the audience. After all, pleasing audiences is what bands who play gigs are supposed to be doing, right?

Basically, you tell the sound guy what you want and he makes it happen. But it's a two-way street. In order for the sound guy to make FOH sound good for the audience, he needs the musicians to be flexible to make changes and adjustments. When the bassist pounds his chest like a furious gibbon and screeches, "I AIN'T CHANGING ANYTHING!", they get in the way of the sound guy getting his job done. That's the kind of stuff they make fun of bassists for over at TalkDrums, TalkGit, TalkKeys, and TalkVox. Das not it mane.

Me? I ain't a sound guy and I ain't at FOH. I know what sounds good in my bedroom, but my bedroom ain't the venue. So I supply a dimed dry send to the expert and let him do the job we hired him to do and make it sound good. If he needs me to adjust something I do it. It's all about the *band's* sound, not *my* sound. Or me.

PS. And I don't be playing foolish games like sandbagging on my volume, either.
 
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#35
smartinson said:
I've been in a band for almost a year now. They had fired their old bassist and brought me on to replace him for a show two weeks after they fired him. I filled in and it was good so I stayed on since then. It was fun, I was having a good time and was able to overlook little things. No biggie.

Their sound guy clearly didn't like me, I think because I pushed back a little at his suggestions? Not sure, but after that, after every show he always had a problem with my setup. Noisy, too much bass, too much treble, too much compression, etc... He pushed me too far and now I've resigned. I'm very sad about it because it was fun and music is my passion but I told myself I'd quit as soon as it wasn't fun. I'm mad at them, too, for ruining something I love.

I know it's best for my mental health but I'm still sad and mad about it. I just needed to vent this out to others that can hopefully relate. Thanks for listening.
Click to expand...

Well, you left for sound. Me, I left one after I found my drummer and keyboardist shooting up heavens knows what. quit the next day. The band was really good with a great following, and one of the best rock vocalists I ever worked with.
 
#37
smartinson said:
I've been in a band for almost a year now. They had fired their old bassist and brought me on to replace him for a show two weeks after they fired him. I filled in and it was good so I stayed on since then. It was fun, I was having a good time and was able to overlook little things. No biggie.

Their sound guy clearly didn't like me, I think because I pushed back a little at his suggestions? Not sure, but after that, after every show he always had a problem with my setup. Noisy, too much bass, too much treble, too much compression, etc... He pushed me too far and now I've resigned. I'm very sad about it because it was fun and music is my passion but I told myself I'd quit as soon as it wasn't fun. I'm mad at them, too, for ruining something I love.

I know it's best for my mental health but I'm still sad and mad about it. I just needed to vent this out to others that can hopefully relate. Thanks for listening.
Click to expand...
Were your band mates aware of your situation with the sound guy?

IME, the old bass player was probably his buddy. Seems like he wanted you to quit. Ask him what's his problem.

I suggest calling a band meeting if it's not too late. Gotta speak and tell your nemisis to back off.
 
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#38
The sound guy wants to get a non muddy sound FOH. Instead of assuming that the sound guy is always an idiot, maybe we should give their suggestions a try. Their instrument is the mixer. You are just the bass player and it's not a solo instrument. The vocals are the most important part of the mix. The bass is a solid foundation. If you're playing games with pedals, then the sound guy has to continuously tweak your sound. The simpler the tone you can feed him, the better. A compressor is usually okay, but he/she will also be compressing the bass and you can get pumping. Most of the other effects get lost in the mix anyways unless you're playing a solo.
 
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#39
MultiScaleMale said:
The sound guy wants to get a non muddy sound FOH. Instead of assuming that the sound guy is always an idiot, maybe we should give their suggestions a try. Their instrument is the mixer. You are just the bass player and it's not a solo instrument. The vocals are the most important part of the mix. The bass is a solid foundation. If you're playing games with pedals, then the sound guy has to continuously tweak your sound. The simpler the tone you can feed him, the better. A compressor is usually okay, but he/she will also be compressing the bass and you can get pumping. Most of the other effects get lost in the mix anyways unless you're playing a solo.
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Yeah, go wireless so you can hear what the the FIH mix sounds like.
 
#40
MultiScaleMale said:
The sound guy wants to get a non muddy sound FOH. Instead of assuming that the sound guy is always an idiot, maybe we should give their suggestions a try. Their instrument is the mixer. You are just the bass player and it's not a solo instrument. The vocals are the most important part of the mix. The bass is a solid foundation. If you're playing games with pedals, then the sound guy has to continuously tweak your sound. The simpler the tone you can feed him, the better. A compressor is usually okay, but he/she will also be compressing the bass and you can get pumping. Most of the other effects get lost in the mix anyways unless you're playing a solo.
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Wish I could "like" this 10 more times.
 

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