Reasons for cancelling Band Practice.

[eldorado2001]

I dislike band practice very much. Any reason to cancel is good enough for me.

 

[BucketOfFish]

"Can't make it tonight. Sorry about that! Grandma died...again and the cat has diarrhea."

 

[thunesBARROW]

Unless I’m being paid, why would I be obliged to attend band practice? Also, pets are family.

 

[Gustopher]

1. family
2. work
3. whatever is more important than the band

Depends on the band and the expectations. Despite some people on this forum acting like they would skip their own mothers funeral rather than cancel practice or a show... I don't quite live my life that way.

 

[Isaac_James]

Reasons my band has cancelled/postposed a regular weekly practice include:

-My kid is not feeling well and we need two parents at home

-We got the COVID

-My kids' school is having an open house/recital, I'll be half an hour late

-I had a heavy therapy session yesterday, still working through it and I need a mental health day

-I fell and fractured my wrist, it needs to be in a cast for a couple of weeks

Not all those are mine, but all were considered perfectly adequate reasons to be late or cancel for the week. Taking care of your body, your mind, and your family is important. Crucially, these incidents are not common in my band; if they were it might be more of a problem, but as it is I am fine taking a week off for personal reasons like this.

Final thought, if a friend/family member/bandmate cancels an appointment due to needing a "mental health day", it's a good idea to check in with them later just to make sure they're doing alright.

 

[JazznFunk]

"my dog got killed" sounds pretty traumatic. Around here it would mean got hit by a car or eaten by coyotes. Even if it was more like "died after a prolonged illness" that can have a profound impact on some pet owners. I don't know why you wouldn't cut the band member some slack this time. For the great majority of us, this isn't our job. It's not that important.

Yeah... lack of sympathy for any loss just shows me it's a toxic environment. Kind of disappointed to see that in a number of these responses.

 

[legalbass]

Family emergencies (including pet loss), illness (do you want to rehearse around sick people?), important commitments which can include regular job stuff (when I'm representing a client on trial, nothing else in my life matters until the verdict comes in -- -- I exaggerate not one bit -- and my current bandmates were informed of this before asking me to join), childbirth/new baby stuff all valid. The sooner you can notify of a conflict, the better. Last-minute cancellations suck for everyone.

Ideally, if a bandmate has to call off a rehearsal, the professional thing to do is propose an alternative night that week for a replacement rehearsal.

A little maturity, compassion and introspection goes a long way in life. Certainly with respect to band rehearsals for what amounts to (for most of us, anyway) a hobby that occasionally brings in a couple Ben Franklins here or there.

 

[Jimmy4string]

I love my dog more than a lot of people I would need some time.
However, if you got a band mate that is habitually dropping out of rehearsal they need to be asked if the project is that important to them.
Like a relationship if they want to move on -cool -just let a fool know!

 

[el murdoque]

IMO it depends on what page every member of the band is on and if it's the same page.

I've had a band where practice was scheduled only when necessary and it involved a lot of logistics. I had a two hour drive (one trip) to rehearsal and was not the one with the longest distance from home to the band's place.

Basically only the real heavy stuff was an excuse. A dying dog is a heavy excuse if you and the dog were close.
Too sick to get out of bed, even with the meds that have really big numbers on the pack. Being arrested. Needing to hide from assassins. Something like that.

I've had a band where we'd try and jam every week, but that band had about one or two gigs per year and was more for fun. The excuse threshold was a lot lower on that one. "It's the first sunny evening in spring and I want to BBQ" was valid there.

 

[DJ Bebop]

Maybe not a reason to cancel but to get a replacement.

I won't make it cause, I died last night.

:Ol

 

[JRA]

What are acceptable reasons for missing band practice?

they're all acceptable!

if you miss enough rehearsals that you're holding me/others back = you are not acceptable for this project and you must be replaced. if you can get your bad luck/schedule/whatever in order: maybe we'll work together again!

 

[51PRI]

I dislike band practice very much. Any reason to cancel is good enough for me.

I like band practice. I enjoy playing music, working on new songs, and refining parts.

Yes it is, at least for any band I have been in.
If it was paying me $100k plus a year, then maybe not, but do not expect my A game.

So you don't give 100% unless the money is right?

You must have missed the practice when they went over that.

Maybe that's the reason Mustang Sally is no longer working for us...no bridge. Where IS that confounded bridge?

Never had a dog?

Yes, I have, and I was pretty upset when she died.

On this forum, it's likely that you're missing one of the umpteenth "practices" that are really just jam sessions and you may try a new song or two. Valid excuses? Just about anything including that you're not into it tonight or have a headache. The problem is when it's a pattern of missing practices.

When any and everything becomes a reason to cancel, yes.

View attachment 4708678
This li'l gal joined the ancestors Easter night. Damn straight it's an acceptable reason.

Yes, as I said in post #1.

I have had massive problems with people cancelling rehearsals. I can't say that there's any "unacceptable" reason, but what people don't seem to think through is that several other people have set aside the time and, possibly, declined other events to be there that night. I don't think many people really take this commitment as seriously as they might. ....

Seems that for some just about anything is a good reason not to practice.

I had to have my rabbit of close to ten years put to sleep this year and I literally spent the whole week before and after with tears in my eyes. Even now I just can't think about her and how sweet she was to our family without my eyes getting wet.....

At some time in the future you will think of your rabbit and smile instead of cry. At that point you will know that a corner has been turned in the grieving process.

Bands that gig a lot don't need as much rehearsal because they're nailing stuff down on stages. I was in bands like this for a decade but none of the bands I'm in now play nearly enough to get tight without some sort of discipline.....

Same here. Back in the day when bands played in the same bar 6 nights a week you got super tight and only needed to rehearse to learn new songs. It's not that way any more.

The day our German shepherd died there’s no way I would/could have attended a rehearsal, or even a gig. I cried for days afterwards, still do occasionally when I think about him, and it’s been almost two years.

Like I said above, at some point you will think of him and smile instead of cry.

You know in reality, the problem I find is that some guys have an excuse for everything. So after the 2nd or 3rd excuses, I start to not believe them.
That being said, as a rule (and I know some won't like it but), If there isn't a major family issue then show up...(if you are really wanting to practice then you will find a way)
Too many years of the excuses that I have had to deal with.
But that is just me.

It's me, too. A dog getting killed is sufficient reason to cancel practice, but I hear a lot of other reasons, too, to the point that the question must be asked...is this band important to you?

 

[Xjenrbcjsmsbfjw]

Yes to the dog thing. A band that gives me a hard time about not being up for stuff after my pup dies is a band you'll see advertising for a new bass player.

 

[LBS-bass]

the point that the question must be asked...is this band important to you?

That's the question, isn't it? And the answer is different for everyone. How important is the secondary question.

For a lot of people it's just a fun thing they do. It's like going out to paint night; if you don't feel like going, you just don't go. There's no investment in it, it's not like you bought tickets. For other people it's a fun thing they do that they want to at least sort of do well, so they practice and learn parts and hope that everyone else will at least do that, but there's always another day if things don't work out this time.

All sorts of things are going to (rightly) play through and those things are reasonable because (hopefully) everyone's in the same place with how serious they are.

For some people it's not really possible to have much fun if the music isn't polished, and that's where the problems really start to arise. Finding like-minded folks is more difficult. The more people you involve, the higher the odds that someone can't make it. And when you start mixing serious pros in, you're dealing with gig nights (because nobody is just in one band anymore), other rehearsal nights, other commitments (if they teach music too), important family stuff, and so forth.

Basically the more serious you get the harder it is to find mutual time, partly because more serious people are more in demand, so have a lot of plates in the air. That's when it really gets to the no fun zone because one plate falling means the rest are likely to go, too.

 

[Xjenrbcjsmsbfjw]

The one I keep getting in an argument about is kid stuff.

I understand parents have an added risk they will need to miss, and I've never given a parent a hard time about "my kid is sick I can't make it." But I have a singer right now who will text the morning of band practice and say she decided to take the kids to the lake and has to reschedule practice and thinks we all have to be fine with it because she said the magic word "kid."

Nope. If you don't have time to play because you want to spend more time with your kids that is a totally acceptable maybe even laudable choice, but you don't get to suddenly decide you are doing something else that day and just because your kids will be there you aren't a flake.

I'd say 15-20% of practices require some form of reschedule, often only an hour or so, because of her kids and it is almost never illness, lack of childcare, etc, it is always because she just decided to do something with them. Hey that's awesome, I'm sure you are a great mom, but you sure aren't much of a bandmate. I like the other band members and I really enjoy myself once we actually do get together, and the stakes are insanely low, otherwise it'd be a deal breaker.

 

[PennyroyalWe]

Threads like this are what make me pity professional and/or “working” musicians. If band practice is so important that someone’s family member dying isn’t a good enough reason to cancel, it seems to me you’ve lost sight of what really IS important in life.
I’d call out of my day job for a few days or more if either of my dogs were to die. I’d sure as hell cancel band practice and not have a single care about if it’s a “good enough reason” for the rest of the band.

 

[cnltb]

'Noone ever does their homework, so I'm staying at home until they do' .

 

[JazznFunk]

Basically the more serious you get the harder it is to find mutual time, partly because more serious people are more in demand, so have a lot of plates in the air. That's when it really gets to the no fun zone because one plate falling means the rest are likely to go, too.

Yes - excellent point. This is where being comfortable with not rehearsing as much is key, and being organized enough in providing charts, setlists, etc. so that everyone can work on things on their own. I find that the most professional players can (and will) do their homework, maybe have one rehearsal, and show up and nail it. With my original jazz trio, we only rehearse if we are introducing new material, are preparing to record, or have not played together in a long time for whatever reason(s). Even with that, sometimes we've rolled into a gig after not playing together for 2 months because our individual schedules just don't sync (and our guitarist lives an hour away, and we respect his time and the burden of traveling unnecessarily). In those 'extended absence' instances, we've sounded better than when we were rehearsing every week, with a few minor exceptions here and there. Some genres/disciplines are more conducive to a 'less is more' approach than others when it comes to rehearsing though.

 

[80jazz]

Where IS that confounded bridge?

In the Crunge.

 

[LBS-bass]

If band practice is so important that someone’s family member dying isn’t a good enough reason to cancel,

Has anyone in this thread or any other thread said anything like this, though? I'd like to see those quotes.