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Set list blows

I'm in one band where we replaced our very good drummer with my husband who was not as experienced, due to some personal issues the former drummer was having. We changed the name of the band after that but that's beside the point. What I'm going to say here will be a shock to many but it is true- musicians who are married are not joined at the hip and if they are adults they can have disagreements over musical choices and still remain committed to the project.

My husband had a long way to go to fill the shoes of the guy who preceded him and at times I was not sure he was up to the task. I've had to coach him and bring him along, and if at any point I'd had an inkling that the other two guys were losing patience with the situation to a degree at which it risked breaking up the band, I would have fired him. It would have broken my heart to do it but he needed to rise to the level we needed and if he wasn't able, at some point the problem would be fixed. He always knew that going in and he always knew he would be challenged.

Yep, that's right, I would have fired my own husband from my own band. Please stop assuming that musicians in a relationship are a fixed team. If they are adults who are there to serve the music and do a job that makes the audience happy, they are not necessarily always in agreement over what that looks like.
Fair enough, but you are more professional than many.
 
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'Play what everyone knows' doesn't mean 'Play what everyone knows'. Gottit
Are you being obtuse on purpose?

As I said in my original post, context matters. The advice given in this thread is in the context of playing for crowds that are expecting to hear covers of songs that they know. Patrons at bars, guests at wedding receptions, people at corporate functions, etc., want to get up and dance to music they know.

If your band is playing a concert then sure, play whatever music you want to.
 
Reading this thread with a certain morbid fascination. I could never have been in a cover band. Even had the money been good, I’d have quit altogether by now or died from drug and/or alcohol abuse. Or perhaps sheer boredom. This thread makes an interesting juxtaposition to the thread about the boredom of playing endless 3 chord, twelve bar, blues shuffles. I think I’d prefer the shuffles. There is the thing about making money I suppose.

BTW, Wilson Pickett’s version of Mustang Sally is a cover. It was written and recorded by Sir Max Rice a year earlier.
 
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i've been lead or co-lead singer in several bands. i have always wanted input from everyone on everything including song choices. nowhere in my universe do i consider myself the arbiter of good songs, and i can have fun singing just about anything.

i was in a cover/originals band where i was mostly the lead singer and one of the guitars. our setlist included "toucha toucha toucha touch me" from the rocky horror picture show, "air" from hair (one of my faves), and even a slow song from cabaret. we tried to sandwich originals, slower songs and less well-known songs between popular songs, and people always seemed happy at a of bar gigs and outdoor events.
 
Doing “deep dive” set lists may be more fun for the band. But doing more than two or three non A-list numbers per set won’t fly with many audiences unless they’re actually listening to the band - because the band made the effort to connect with their audience.

A lot of cover bands I’ve seen act more like faceless jukeboxes and just crank out songs along with a little half hearted banter every so often. That is not going to engage an audience or get them on your side enough to follow you where you want to lead them.

Another big reason I’ve seen that many bands will choose to stick to the usual list of standards plus whatever is currently trending is because they mostly play venues where there’s a lot of dancing. And the issue you run into with that is how many people, or maybe even most people, simply won’t dance to songs they don’t already know very well. So a lot of what you can get away with on your set list also depends on the nature of the audience the venue attracts.
 
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I'm in one band where we replaced our very good drummer with my husband who was not as experienced, due to some personal issues the former drummer was having. We changed the name of the band after that but that's beside the point. What I'm going to say here will be a shock to many but it is true- musicians who are married are not joined at the hip and if they are adults they can have disagreements over musical choices and still remain committed to the project.

My husband had a long way to go to fill the shoes of the guy who preceded him and at times I was not sure he was up to the task. I've had to coach him and bring him along, and if at any point I'd had an inkling that the other two guys were losing patience with the situation to a degree at which it risked breaking up the band, I would have fired him. It would have broken my heart to do it but he needed to rise to the level we needed and if he wasn't able, at some point the problem would be fixed. He always knew that going in and he always knew he would be challenged.

Yep, that's right, I would have fired my own husband from my own band. Please stop assuming that musicians in a relationship are a fixed team. If they are adults who are there to serve the music and do a job that makes the audience happy, they are not necessarily always in agreement over what that looks like.

My wife and I also are in the band together. She is the vocalist (and main attraction, these days). We do not operate as a voting bloc, ever. That just sounds dysfunctional.
 
Doing “deep dive” set lists may be more fun for the band. But doing more than two or three non A-list numbers per set won’t fly with many audiences unless they’re actually listening to the band - because the band made the effort to connect with their audience.

A lot of cover bands I’ve seen act more like faceless jukeboxes and just crank out songs along with a little half hearted banter every so often. That is not going to engage an audience or get them on your side enough to follow you where you want to lead them.

Another big reason I’ve seen that many bands will choose to stick to the usual list of standards plus whatever is currently trending is because they mostly play venues where there’s a lot of dancing. And the issue you run into with that is how many people, or maybe even most people, simply won’t dance to songs they don’t already know very well. So a lot of what you can get away with on your set list also depends on the nature of the audience the venue attracts.

i've seen bands who played music i can best describe as dreary. while some people head to the bar while they are playing, more head to the bathroom or out the door.

we were once waiting for a band a friend of mine was singing in to play, and the act 2 bands before them was awful - literally the worse i've never heard. i have a very high tolerance for music i don't like, but my friends and i had to leave to grab some fast food while they played - they were truly bad in every way. extremely off tempo, horrid lyrics, the singer never met a note he couldn't miss, the guitar was out of tune, the drummer was missing ends of phrases. btw, the singer - it was his band, and he was paying the band out of his pocket - felt like a rock star after the show. he hit on all the women there, me included, strutted around, invited us to see his band's next show, offering tickets, and so on. it was obvious that emptying the club almost completely wasn't a hint for him.

My wife and I also are in the band together. She is the vocalist (and main attraction, these days). We do not operate as a voting bloc, ever. That just sounds dysfunctional.

my husband and i became a couple while in the same band, and we were in 2 other bands together. we never voted to back each other. we have our own preferences and opinions, and that's how we voted.

yes, it's dysfunctional, but in my experience, couples are more likely to back each others' ideas than not - no matter how bad those ideas are LOL
 
i've seen bands who played music i can best describe as dreary. while some people head to the bar while they are playing, more head to the bathroom or out the door.

Reminds me of a certain bar in my hometown back in the ‘70s. This was back in the day when there was plenty of places hosting good rock bands and there were still local music scenes. My area actually had two differently vibed scenes going simultaneously. We were actually spoilt for choice when it came to live bands.

But there was this one bar/restaurant that had carved out a unique niche for itself. The Center, as it was called, was where you went when you wanted to hear bad bands. The “bandstand” such as it was (a small part of the floor in the back corner) was actually directly in front of the ladies restroom door. Girls had to cut through the band to use it. Spoke volumes that did. And we loved the place for all of that. No need to dance or pay the bands any attention whatsoever. Just a place to hang with your friend, have some drinks, and kill a giant tray or two of of unusually excellent fries. (Go figure. Guess they finally screwed up and accidentally did something right. :rolleyes:)

Imagine being so spoiled that you actually welcomed the occasional break from hearing decent music just to enjoy a little contrast.

Memories…:laugh:
 
Lead singers are usually impossible to move on song selection. I would hit the ejection seat button for myself

So true. Agree all you want on song selection, at the end of the day they'll push out any songs they don't like, regardless of number of upvotes. My next band will be an instrumental one. If I'm gonna be in a non-marketable band, at least it'll save me the headache of dealing with a prima donna singer.
 
So true. Agree all you want on song selection, at the end of the day they'll push out any songs they don't like, regardless of number of upvotes. My next band will be an instrumental one. If I'm gonna be in a non-marketable band, at least it'll save me the headache of dealing with a prima donna singer.
If you can make an instrumental band work for you, great!

But allow me to suggest an alternative. The next time you audition singers, ask them about how they select songs, and how open they are to suggestions. Make that one of the very first things that is covered, and there will be no room later for games.
 
It always amazes me that, out of the many thousands of hit songs out there through the years, bands seem to opt for the two extremes of either:

- playing the same 45 tired songs that every band had been playing since 1979 or,
- playing songs that nobody has ever heard.

Tell your singer that there are many well-known tunes that aren't on the list of 45 overdone songs, and that the band will have better success if you attempt to draw from that pool of tunes rather than doing obscure B sides.

If that doesn't work, either fire the singer, get someone else to pick tunes, or poach the other players and start your own band.

Well said, when I read most of the comments on these subjects, I also get that exact same feeling. Here and everywhere I go. It’s the snowball effect.
 
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A quick bit of advice, You'll find it easier to find a band with the attitude you want than change the attitude of the band you are in.
+1

Sounds like you need to stop playing Mustang Sally, or start playing Mustang Sally.
:laugh:

OP, maybe the set list isn't the biggest issue. Maybe you just don't vibe with the rest of the band? Honest question.
Great question. Chemistry has to be there for me.

yes, it's dysfunctional, but in my experience, couples are more likely to back each others' ideas than not - no matter how bad those ideas are
That’s my experience too.

Every decision must be for the betterment of the band and its potential to re-book.
Excellent point. The saying “Don’t make it personal, don’t take it personally” applies.
 
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My next band will be an instrumental one. If I'm gonna be in a non-marketable band, at least it'll save me the headache of dealing with a prima donna singer.
My mate has an instrumental band that does Jazz, Motown & some modern Pop songs. For the premium gigs They have a guest singer for half the songs. They pick one, but have 4 singers they can call on & choose from based on the venue, function, style of music, audience, etc.
 
So true. Agree all you want on song selection, at the end of the day they'll push out any songs they don't like, regardless of number of upvotes. My next band will be an instrumental one. If I'm gonna be in a non-marketable band, at least it'll save me the headache of dealing with a prima donna singer.

Yes. People tend to forget, and by "people" I mean us, musicians, who are often hyper focused on the quality of our contribution, the instrumentals.

For any band to be successful, you can't just "find a singer." You need a real singer, who's committed to BRINGING IT, to SELLING every single phrase of every song. NOT just someone with a good voice. Someone who takes the craft seriously.

Many "singers" can't or won't do that. The former usually because they're inexperienced or the song is not a good fit. The latter usually because they simply don't like the song.
 
Lead singers are usually impossible to move on song selection. I would hit the ejection seat button for myself

i've only had that problem once, and i bailed PDQ. most singers i worked with were happy for input and suggestions, but then that's probably why we got along. as a lead singer with several bands, i refused to be the only one picking the songs to so everyone got to contribute.

The only cover we currently play is the hokey pokey (@ 130bpm) It gets the crowd going every time.....

And, that’s what it’s all about.

ah, that takes me back...

in the 90's, we formed a project to play a single 3 day event. we did a variety of covers and originals, and in a single number, my good friend and punk rocker came up on stage with a megaphone, yelled through it "okay, everyone - it's hokey pokey time!", and we played a super fast totally punk hokey pokey cover with him writhing and screaming the lyrics - he even did the worm. for some reason, our audience went crazy! the second night, the minute he appeared on stage, they started screaming and clapping!
 

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