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Should I just leave?
- Thread starter Felken
- Start date
A pretty similar situation...
- BL starts the band to have an outlet for material he wrote several years ago. Good songs.
- I contact him, we agree to try out. I go to their 2nd rehearsal well prepared. They are still learning their parts, I have the songs down cold. I tell BL that giving musical input to a project is a key thing for me.
- BL and me don't mesh. He contradicts almost anything I say.
- Rest of the guys easier, but they're old friends with BL
- BL categorically rejects all of my ideas for any changes to songs.
- First gigs. Few people show up, but reception is quite good.
- Between-song-banter and audience engagement non-existent. Instead, space between songs is filled with droning noise.
- Very little progress at rehearsals. No new songs for a year.
- Scraping the very bottom of song jar, but nothing takes off.
- Finally a new song. I write a part for the song. BL cuts my bass off that section prior to mixing, "better this way".
- Very poor and quite expensive mix on the new song. BL loses his marbles when I state this. I do audio professionally, so I can back my words.
- More songs recorded. BL insists on live tracking, but due to drummer being seriously off-beat, all of the drums have to be quantized. Bass is re-tracked.
- Bass is re-re-tracked on almost every song, because BL had a different idea. Some songs will have his bass from his original demos.
- BL tracks all synth bass. Long, sustaining notes with no variation, or hooks.
- 1 of the 3 guitarists rage quits a day before a gig. Said gig does not go too well. 30min of gig material.
- I mention drummers shaky playing (studio experience above + been learning a beat to a song for 2 years, and still groove is like running of a 3-legged horse) to BL after a gig where we had a sub drummer, who made the band sound 4x better. BL thinks the drummer and me just "need some work" together. Reluctant to find a new drummer, because the current drummer's lady is friends with her wife. Plus, the drummer is good with social media.
- I have to decline doing some shows because of work commitments.
- BL contacts me and drummer to tell us to have a talk to fix the problems between us. Drummer and me agree we have no issues between us.
- Drummer actually practices, and gets the problem song down. At least close.
- BL has to work on his guitar playing. He plays pretty much only barre chords.
- Gigs. No pay at most, poor attendance. Some serious playing issues at some gigs. Attendance issue blamed on lack of social media presence. One song released digitally.
- payments for general costs like recording, gas, mixing etc...
- Paid promotion. I'm against. Goes wrong, achieves nothing.
- Some more gigs. Opportunity for a pay-to-play tour abroad. First, I decline, but then agree to do it.
- Tour has very poor attendance, and close to zero advertising apart from our social media.
- Another opportunity for a really expensive pay-to-play tour abroad for a week. I have to decline, because it feels like a rip-off, and work.
- New plans for recording a new song.
- I have to decline a show with a fast schedule because of work.
- BL and drummer enter studio. I find out about it on band FB.
- I record bass at home. BL asks for a new version with a dry DI track added.
- I re-record.
- BL asks about my recording signal flow. I explain.
- BL decides to school me on recording (my profession for 25 years). "A good DI makes all the difference". I disagree to some extent and explain.
- Radio silence for close to a month.
All the way through 2,5 years, I have been thinking: MONEY (negative), HANG (mainly positive, apart from BL on his worst days), MUSIC (some of it positive)...
- BL calls and I have to go. Fired.
- I get my stuff from rehearsal room. I notice someone has been using it during radio silence.
- BL starts the band to have an outlet for material he wrote several years ago. Good songs.
- I contact him, we agree to try out. I go to their 2nd rehearsal well prepared. They are still learning their parts, I have the songs down cold. I tell BL that giving musical input to a project is a key thing for me.
- BL and me don't mesh. He contradicts almost anything I say.
- Rest of the guys easier, but they're old friends with BL
- BL categorically rejects all of my ideas for any changes to songs.
- First gigs. Few people show up, but reception is quite good.
- Between-song-banter and audience engagement non-existent. Instead, space between songs is filled with droning noise.
- Very little progress at rehearsals. No new songs for a year.
- Scraping the very bottom of song jar, but nothing takes off.
- Finally a new song. I write a part for the song. BL cuts my bass off that section prior to mixing, "better this way".
- Very poor and quite expensive mix on the new song. BL loses his marbles when I state this. I do audio professionally, so I can back my words.
- More songs recorded. BL insists on live tracking, but due to drummer being seriously off-beat, all of the drums have to be quantized. Bass is re-tracked.
- Bass is re-re-tracked on almost every song, because BL had a different idea. Some songs will have his bass from his original demos.
- BL tracks all synth bass. Long, sustaining notes with no variation, or hooks.
- 1 of the 3 guitarists rage quits a day before a gig. Said gig does not go too well. 30min of gig material.
- I mention drummers shaky playing (studio experience above + been learning a beat to a song for 2 years, and still groove is like running of a 3-legged horse) to BL after a gig where we had a sub drummer, who made the band sound 4x better. BL thinks the drummer and me just "need some work" together. Reluctant to find a new drummer, because the current drummer's lady is friends with her wife. Plus, the drummer is good with social media.
- I have to decline doing some shows because of work commitments.
- BL contacts me and drummer to tell us to have a talk to fix the problems between us. Drummer and me agree we have no issues between us.
- Drummer actually practices, and gets the problem song down. At least close.
- BL has to work on his guitar playing. He plays pretty much only barre chords.
- Gigs. No pay at most, poor attendance. Some serious playing issues at some gigs. Attendance issue blamed on lack of social media presence. One song released digitally.
- payments for general costs like recording, gas, mixing etc...
- Paid promotion. I'm against. Goes wrong, achieves nothing.
- Some more gigs. Opportunity for a pay-to-play tour abroad. First, I decline, but then agree to do it.
- Tour has very poor attendance, and close to zero advertising apart from our social media.
- Another opportunity for a really expensive pay-to-play tour abroad for a week. I have to decline, because it feels like a rip-off, and work.
- New plans for recording a new song.
- I have to decline a show with a fast schedule because of work.
- BL and drummer enter studio. I find out about it on band FB.
- I record bass at home. BL asks for a new version with a dry DI track added.
- I re-record.
- BL asks about my recording signal flow. I explain.
- BL decides to school me on recording (my profession for 25 years). "A good DI makes all the difference". I disagree to some extent and explain.
- Radio silence for close to a month.
All the way through 2,5 years, I have been thinking: MONEY (negative), HANG (mainly positive, apart from BL on his worst days), MUSIC (some of it positive)...
- BL calls and I have to go. Fired.
- I get my stuff from rehearsal room. I notice someone has been using it during radio silence.
Last edited:
wow, you're a patient person. i'd have been out of there at
- I contact him, we agree to try out. I go to their 2nd rehearsal well prepared. They are still learning their parts, I have the songs down cold. I tell BL that giving musical input to a project is a key thing for me.
I've said it before; if I'm thinking about leaving a band it means I should have quit months ago.
It sounds like you play with the drummer in one of my bands. He argues with just about everything I say. We even had the triplet argument. He's completely self taught, probably doesn't even know what a triplet is, but he knew that the line we were arguing about wasn't triplets. We're looking for a new drummer, he's used all his get out of jail free cards.
UPDATE:
Guy left the band. Didn’t even have to talk to the other guys about it. He’s in a second band and it was clear from the start that he wasn’t into it. Our band was more of a side project just for fun in his eyes. Confirmed it when he texted us that he’s leaving.
Guy left the band. Didn’t even have to talk to the other guys about it. He’s in a second band and it was clear from the start that he wasn’t into it. Our band was more of a side project just for fun in his eyes. Confirmed it when he texted us that he’s leaving.
