An abbreviated list of the causes TBers’ Heartburn on the Forums, in no special order. The more trivial the topic, the more heated the discussion.
Guitar Center
T-shirts on stage
Shorts on stage
Barefoot on stage
Short scale basses
P-basses
J-basses
U-basses
Fender
Gibson
Rickenbacker
Active vs. passive and vice versa
Any bass that doesn’t offer the scale length, finish or pickup layout you want
Any player whose bass isn’t the scale length, finish or pickup layout you like
Made in ______ vs. made in ______ when you’ve never held either one
2-lb amps that don’t kick out 1000 watts
800-watt amps that cost more than $199
Combos ... at all
Any amp that doesn’t sound exactly like the SVT
Any amp that doesn’t sound exactly like you want it to do
Bedroom practice amps with less than 200 watts
Practice amps that “don’t have my sound”
Speakers arranged horizontally
4x10 stacked with 1x15
4x10 cabs weighing more than a 1x12
Markbass’ yellow speakers
Drummers
Singers
Keyboardists
Guitarists (bonus points if they sing)
Any song in a horn key (i.e. F, Bb, Eb, Ab)
Belittling what someone else does because it’s not what you’d do
- if you were in a band
- if your band had a gig
- if you had the money to do what you slagged someone else for not doing
Stores that don’t give you deeper discounts than rumor says they gave anyone else
Online stores that don’t absorb shipping costs, both ways when you return it
New threads asking the same inane questions asked in a dozen other threads
Expecting (demanding) replies that match or support your own prejudices
Larding on intermediate music theory in answer to a beginner’s question
(corollary: quibbling about theory among yourselves once the OP is driven away)
Opining that everyone needs to learn music theory
Opining that no one needs to learn music theory
Snarking that something is easy when a new player is having trouble learning
Refusing to accept that your fave strings don’t work for everyone on every bass
(They’re clearly doing something wrong.)
The shipping company’s routing of products shipped to you
Purple silk on flats?! What were they thinking?
No matter how talented, skilled, famous, accomplished or admired a player is, they need belittling from someone who has trouble locating more than two E notes on a fretted bass
Cliff Clavin-style pronouncements about any topic
There! The pot is stirred and waiting only for someone with a match.
“Hey, Mods! You may hear about this thread before long.”
Guitar Center
T-shirts on stage
Shorts on stage
Barefoot on stage
Short scale basses
P-basses
J-basses
U-basses
Fender
Gibson
Rickenbacker
Active vs. passive and vice versa
Any bass that doesn’t offer the scale length, finish or pickup layout you want
Any player whose bass isn’t the scale length, finish or pickup layout you like
Made in ______ vs. made in ______ when you’ve never held either one
2-lb amps that don’t kick out 1000 watts
800-watt amps that cost more than $199
Combos ... at all
Any amp that doesn’t sound exactly like the SVT
Any amp that doesn’t sound exactly like you want it to do
Bedroom practice amps with less than 200 watts
Practice amps that “don’t have my sound”
Speakers arranged horizontally
4x10 stacked with 1x15
4x10 cabs weighing more than a 1x12
Markbass’ yellow speakers
Drummers
Singers
Keyboardists
Guitarists (bonus points if they sing)
Any song in a horn key (i.e. F, Bb, Eb, Ab)
Belittling what someone else does because it’s not what you’d do
- if you were in a band
- if your band had a gig
- if you had the money to do what you slagged someone else for not doing
Stores that don’t give you deeper discounts than rumor says they gave anyone else
Online stores that don’t absorb shipping costs, both ways when you return it
New threads asking the same inane questions asked in a dozen other threads
Expecting (demanding) replies that match or support your own prejudices
Larding on intermediate music theory in answer to a beginner’s question
(corollary: quibbling about theory among yourselves once the OP is driven away)
Opining that everyone needs to learn music theory
Opining that no one needs to learn music theory
Snarking that something is easy when a new player is having trouble learning
Refusing to accept that your fave strings don’t work for everyone on every bass
(They’re clearly doing something wrong.)
The shipping company’s routing of products shipped to you
Purple silk on flats?! What were they thinking?
No matter how talented, skilled, famous, accomplished or admired a player is, they need belittling from someone who has trouble locating more than two E notes on a fretted bass
Cliff Clavin-style pronouncements about any topic
There! The pot is stirred and waiting only for someone with a match.
“Hey, Mods! You may hear about this thread before long.”
. 
