I wanna be the power screw-driver.
Phillips Head - sounds kinky.
Flat-head -sounds like a girl you can rest a beer on.
Monkey Wrench - what you and I specialize in.
Enjoy the benefits of a premium membership!
Upgrade Account
-
TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
Join free Log in
Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.
Stick around? Walk Away? or Say Something?
- Thread starter zeppfan90
- Start date
Phillips Head - sounds kinky.
Flat-head -sounds like a girl you can rest a beer on.
Monkey Wrench - what you and I specialize in.
Where is the insult? An insult would be "you suck and he's so much better." or "Hang out man, we don't like your playing but we need your gear."
What has actually happened here is the guitar player has tried to be nice and let gear guy know he prefers the gearless wonder's playing. If gear guy is too thick to take a polite blow off and move on, who's fault is that?
What I see here is a guy who got replaced and can't accept the reality of what happened so he comes here and makes himself the hapless victim of usurious musicians when the truth of the situation is the guitar player was upfront AND polite when he told the guy he wanted the other guy for his bass player.
When I get that message I thank them for the opportunity, pack my trash and hit the door. I most certainly won't keep hanging out after the guitar guy made it clear he didn't want me playing bass for him.
Granted, he (guitarist) could have been more direct, and blunt, or he could have been a total ass about it, but the fact of the matter is, he made his feelings clear to the guy and the guy completely ignored this and continued under the fantasy that there was still a future for him in the situation beyond letting someone use his gear.
I think without being direct it was not in any way polite. Polite would have been to contact OP after rehearsal and say it wasn't working out. If the guitarist keeps scheduling rehearsals/jams with the OP, then there really was no "blow off" at all, just a pretty clueless comment that could easily be taken as insulting, whether it was meant as an insult or not. Nothing to get twisted up about, and the final result is the same: OP, please stop going to the guitarist's house. Find another project to work with .
First, consider the source, a guitarist who was asking bass 1 over to play and bass 2 (an old friend of guitarist) shows up, plays and impresses the guitar player. No matter what bass 1 thought about the situation it was a decision strictly for the guitarist to make and he did when he told bass one "You are good but he's just a bass phenom". Guilty of a glaring lack of social skills? absolutely. Guilty of an appalling lack of tact? no doubt, but he at least tried in his own way to complement bass 1, to let him down easy when it would have been just as easy to blow him off with an insult or put down of his skills. Instead, he told bass 1 he was good, but he liked bass 2 better. Could have been handled better, but could have also been handled much worse. Either way bass 1 was told he had been aced by bass 2. If he chose to hang after that he did so at his own volition and whatever happened is on his plate, not the guy who had already told him he was not the chosen bass player for the project.
The thing so many are missing here is bass 1's opinion of bass 2 are moot and have absolutely on bearing on the situation, it was not his call to make and no matter what he might think of his skill when compared bass 2's skill, and even if his assessment was correct, it was the guitarist who had to make the decision and he made it plain he preferred bass 2, which is where IMO the story ends with bass 1 packing his trash and starting his search for a slot better suited to his skills.
jazzyitalian
Supporting Member
This guitar player is world class ASS and he's using you so his friend can jam with him.
If there is one thing I can't stand it's a guy that's too cheap to rent gear or even buy a squire starter kit. What's worse, is someone that blatantly disguises his intent with some rude-ass tactless commentary about how good his buddy plays.
Look, at this point, I would skip the whole discussion option and just not speak with him or call him anymore. Forget he exists.
Let this guy wallow with his buddy who in my view is just an anchor and a taker. There are thousands of good song writers.
It's your life and you need a band that's got more class than this jerk. Find a band that treats you with some respect and honestly. Judging from your story, I don't think it'll be hard to find.
Theres my opinion.
If there is one thing I can't stand it's a guy that's too cheap to rent gear or even buy a squire starter kit. What's worse, is someone that blatantly disguises his intent with some rude-ass tactless commentary about how good his buddy plays.
Look, at this point, I would skip the whole discussion option and just not speak with him or call him anymore. Forget he exists.
Let this guy wallow with his buddy who in my view is just an anchor and a taker. There are thousands of good song writers.
It's your life and you need a band that's got more class than this jerk. Find a band that treats you with some respect and honestly. Judging from your story, I don't think it'll be hard to find.
Theres my opinion.
Since bass dude 2 is such a phenom, the OP should just give him all of his gear and worship the ground he walks on.
He should also provide guitarist with as much weed as guitarist needs to finish his masterpiece album.
To be a doormat, you must first lay down.
He should also provide guitarist with as much weed as guitarist needs to finish his masterpiece album.
To be a doormat, you must first lay down.
This is what I find insulting >>
"Hang out man, we don't like your playing but we need your gear."
"Hang out man, we don't like your playing but we need your gear."
Since bass dude 2 is such a phenom, the OP should just give him all of his gear and worship the ground he walks on.
He should also provide guitarist with as much weed as guitarist needs to finish his masterpiece album.
To be a doormat, you must first lay down.
Really?? Are you truly possessed of such a fragile ego that being passed over at an audition would prompt such venom and negative thoughts about the situation? Music should be fun my friend but never forget it is also very much a competition and you don't get to win them all, even the one's you are sure you have in the bag, if the decision is in the hands of someone else.
if the above is how you handle rejection, you should sell all your gear now and find a less competitive way to spend your time. Trust me when I tell you, music is a world populated by all manner of people and there are far more shallow a-holes than caring individuals who give a crap about your opinion, much less your ego. When you run into those shallow a-hole types it is always best to just wipe off the blood and move on. You can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear. You might make good music with an a-hole, but it will be a constant exercise in frustration and futility.
What bass 1 does after he's informed he was not chosen for the slot is on him and no one else. If he decides to be a doormat that's his bad, not the people who are benefitting from bass 1's inability to accept the decision of the individual who had the decision to make. No one was forcing bass 1 to go back after that decision was made, he was the one who kept going back after it was plain he'd been rejected.
If you could take off your fragile little ego glasses for just a minute you could see that bass 1 has actually been spared the waste of any more of his time by trying to pursue what will ultimately be a train wreck of more bad decisions by a BL who makes decisions based on factors other than what is best for the music.
Again, just because it was not handled in the best way and didn't end in the manner bass 1 wished it would have doesn't mean more should be read in to it that what it actually was, and that was an audition where 2 bass players tried out for a job and one was chosen.
And who forced the guy to keep going back?
Venom and negative thoughts?
I think you read my post far more seriously than it was ever intended.
Ego glasses? Did you really believe that I was advocating what I wrote? To be clear and plain, I was being intentionally preposterous to shed some humor on the situation.
Except the doormat part. That was pretty much in line with what you're saying anyway.
That is the best thing I've read in a long time, I'm going to look this George Carlin fellow up...
I've read all your replies to this post but you're 100% wrong about everything you have said. I wasn't offended at all because I don't have some type of self esteem issues that you're implying I have. I didn't come on here to make myself seem like a "victim." And I wasn't under some fantasy.
Anyway. I've just stopped going. I'm just "extremely busy" lately.
