Suicide and those quietly considering it

[i_got_a_mohawk]

I have recently had a friend of mine that was in Iraq with me kill himself. To many soilders are doing it, I won't lie and say that the first 6 months back were not extremely hard but I never got to that point, but alot do. I won't say that it's right, but I understand. PTSD is a hell of a thing.

Sorry to hear about your loss It's frightening the lack of support for soldiers after-the-fact. I recall seeing stats showing that the number of post-deployment suicides by-far outweighing the casualties of war (though I would still say those suicides are casualties in themselves).

There was a local (to my hometown) ex-soldier who took his own life about 6 months ago (a few days before christmas ), I knew who he was (in that small-town way) but couldn't say I knew him beyond a face and name :

Invalid Link Removed

(so, in the past 6 months, in my little hometown, three guys, aged between 22 and 29 have taken their lives :scowl: )

 

[nickbass79]

Sorry to hear about it man, I hope you are alright. Look back but don't stare. Best advice I have ever gotten in regards to losing someone.

 

[fourstringdrums]

The 16 year old sister of a friend of mine just attempted suicide by shooting herself in the head and she survived. She's got a long road of recovery ahead of her. She is aware of what she did, and I just hope that for her it is the fact that she alive that gives her some new hope.

 

[Broadstbully22]

Sorry to hear about your loss It's frightening the lack of support for soldiers after-the-fact. I recall seeing stats showing that the number of post-deployment suicides by-far outweighing the casualties of war (though I would still say those suicides are casualties in themselves).

There was a local (to my hometown) ex-soldier who took his own life about 6 months ago (a few days before christmas ), I knew who he was (in that small-town way) but couldn't say I knew him beyond a face and name :

Invalid Link Removed

(so, in the past 6 months, in my little hometown, three guys, aged between 22 and 29 have taken their lives :scowl: )

A veteran takes his life once every 7 minutes in this country. And the last stat I read showed that it is almost double the fatalities in war. The IED's are causing alot of brain injuryies. You should check out Vetsprevail.com. It is a wonderful website and organization that I send money to and do fund raisers with.

 

[Broadstbully22]

Sorry, It's vetsprevail.org This is one of their videos made a while back. Crazy.

 

[1958Bassman]

The 16 year old sister of a friend of mine just attempted suicide by shooting herself in the head and she survived. She's got a long road of recovery ahead of her. She is aware of what she did, and I just hope that for her it is the fact that she alive that gives her some new hope.

My second cousin tried doing that and she lived, too. She now counsels people who are considering suicide. Messed her up, physically.

 

[afzoomie67]

My friend did.. I posted a thread about it awhile back..This was about 2 months ago.

 

[XtheDeadPawn]

Proof that your dead inside you read this thread and don't feel anything.

I know it's wrong I should feel sad, mad, something but, I don't.

I'm labeled as Bi-Polar, Clinicaly Depressed, ADHD, OCD, and have bouts of Mania every now and then.

The sick part I hate the world I do like really really hate it and myself too just for hating it. I think everyone is replaceable and don't really cry about when someone I know dies anymore. Sure I miss them for a bit but, then strangely enough I sorta lock the memory's with them inside of a vault in my mind and never open it again...willingly. I don't fear death I'm just sorta waiting for it in a sick twisted way not really wanting it as much as much as knowing that it can happen at any time and I get a sick perverse exictedness about it.

I am 22 and I feel like my soul is in it's 30's. I almost cut my wrists open at 11 or 12 in a suicide attempt. I didn't follow through with it but, every so often I think "What if I just cut myself open" I sorta enjoy the thought of taking my own life.

However am I concerned I'm gonna take it one day? No.
And contrary to what many posters believe people who kill themselves aren't cowards well, I sorta do. See they know what their doing is gonna kill themselves just like a 5 year old who throws the board game off the table when he's about to loose knows it'll end the game. They know exactly what their doing and you can bet how it'll affect the one's their leaving behind is running through their minds.

I call them cowards because sure life gave them a crappy hand but are you gonna whine about it or are you gonna do something to change it? They decide instead of changing it for the better their gonna change it by ending it and someone who's afraid to face his/her fears is a coward plain and simple.

If I commited suicide that night I would have caused my family pain, and while I may have ended my pain theirs would have just started. If you really love someone you wouldn't want to cause them pain.

People who commit suicide are selfish, uncaring, cowards. I don't feel sorry for them Hell, I hardly feel sorry for anyone but, who I do feel sorry for the most out of anyone is people who are affected by suicide the so called people killing themselves aren't victims their cowards.

 

[Bloodhammer]

I've known two people who committed suicide - well, one I actually knew, the other was a friend of a friend whose skull contents I know better than his personality while alive.

Both of them did it without any warning. I think they were both extremely drunk when they did it, too. The guy who shot himself in my garage was surrounded by beer and liquor bottles. Luckily the bullet didn't keep going through the garage ceiling and into my sleeping neighbor whose bed was directly above.

It's very important to talk to someone if you're contemplating suicide. Both of those deaths could have been avoided, but no one saw them coming and so no one could offer any help.

Also, think about the friends/family that are left with nothing but a huge bloody mess where you ceased to exist. The coroner leaves all that for them to clean up themselves.

 

[XtheDeadPawn]

Your brain still thinks when drunk it just processes things much more slowly.

Oh, and I go to a psychiatrist every three months and am on Prozac so I'm good.

 

[Skitch it!]

Suicide is a moment of weakness, things will change but you do need help for the clarity and self awareness to see that frame, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy comes into its own there.

XtheDeadPawn, I'm not walking into your manor and telling you what's what, but what do you see here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post-traumatic_embitterment_disorder

 

[i_got_a_mohawk]

Proof that your dead inside you read this thread and don't feel anything.

I know it's wrong I should feel sad, mad, something but, I don't.

I'm labeled as Bi-Polar, Clinicaly Depressed, ADHD, OCD, and have bouts of Mania every now and then.

The sick part I hate the world I do like really really hate it and myself too just for hating it. I think everyone is replaceable and don't really cry about when someone I know dies anymore. Sure I miss them for a bit but, then strangely enough I sorta lock the memory's with them inside of a vault in my mind and never open it again...willingly. I don't fear death I'm just sorta waiting for it in a sick twisted way not really wanting it as much as much as knowing that it can happen at any time and I get a sick perverse exictedness about it.

I am 22 and I feel like my soul is in it's 30's. I almost cut my wrists open at 11 or 12 in a suicide attempt. I didn't follow through with it but, every so often I think "What if I just cut myself open" I sorta enjoy the thought of taking my own life.

However am I concerned I'm gonna take it one day? No.
And contrary to what many posters believe people who kill themselves aren't cowards well, I sorta do. See they know what their doing is gonna kill themselves just like a 5 year old who throws the board game off the table when he's about to loose knows it'll end the game. They know exactly what their doing and you can bet how it'll affect the one's their leaving behind is running through their minds.

I call them cowards because sure life gave them a crappy hand but are you gonna whine about it or are you gonna do something to change it? They decide instead of changing it for the better their gonna change it by ending it and someone who's afraid to face his/her fears is a coward plain and simple.

If I commited suicide that night I would have caused my family pain, and while I may have ended my pain theirs would have just started. If you really love someone you wouldn't want to cause them pain.

People who commit suicide are selfish, uncaring, cowards. I don't feel sorry for them Hell, I hardly feel sorry for anyone but, who I do feel sorry for the most out of anyone is people who are affected by suicide the so called people killing themselves aren't victims their cowards.

People suffer mental illness in different ways.

For many who take their own life, they see it as the only way. As another poster mentioned, single track mind, they are unable to see the consequences or they see their passing as a benifit to others. Part of me used to think it was selfish, but now, less so. As you should know, the mind can work in ****ed up ways. I'll mourn the loss and celebrate the life, judgement is nothing more than self-righteous narcissism.

I've lost a lot of people that I know in the last 5 years, from friends of friends to close family, and everything in between. I haven't cried, per-say, over the past few, where it has certainly been more a case of shock and it certainly boldens the selfish realisation of ones own mortality.

You have a lot of hatred, claiming that you hate yourself and the world around you, you claim people who commit suicide are cowards because they don't change things for the better. Do you try and change things for the better in your life? Are you doing enough?

I'm glad you are getting help and are ok (relatively speaking), but you really need to sort out the anger, loathing and hatred.

Your brain still thinks when drunk it just processes things much more slowly.

It also reduces your inhibitions, which can be all someone on the edge needs.

 

[XtheDeadPawn]

HA HA HA that isn't me at all.

I admit the world did me wrong but, it does/has/will do everybody else wrong too. I just hate that I am so bitter as to hate it so I hate myself. I don't think the world owes me anything or that I should change my outlook on life either.

I've learned to harness my hatred into things that maybe one day will help someone feel better about themselves. When that day comes maybe then I'll change my hatred for something better. I don't care who disagrees with me or my views but, then again this is the internet it's full of views some appauling others appealing.

 

[fourstringdrums]

My second cousin tried doing that and she lived, too. She now counsels people who are considering suicide. Messed her up, physically.

It's still too soon to see with her but she's making good progress. She had surgery, but I think it was to manage the brain swelling. I believe the bullet is still lodged in her brain.

 

[nickbass79]

I Got A Mohawk, I have also had many (5) friends that were pretty close commit suicide in the last few years. They were 24-60 years old, so quite a difference in age. Sorry you have to go through this again. I will tip a dram for you and your friends.

 

[fourstringdrums]

I've learned to harness my hatred into things that maybe one day will help someone feel better about themselves.

Through music I'm assuming?

It seems like a contradiction to say that your hatred will help others feel better. I think I know what you mean, it's just strange to read it.

Have you ever talked to anyone? Obviously you've gone through something at an early age and you might not be dealing with it.

 

[i_got_a_mohawk]

XtheDeadPawn, good job in trying to hijack the thread with your own problems. I'm sorry you have them and hope you find happiness.

I Got A Mohawk, I have also had many (5) friends that were pretty close commit suicide in the last few years. They were 24-60 years old, so quite a difference in age. Sorry you have to go through this again. I will tip a dram for you and your friends.

Thanks Nick, was just trying to help promote the idea of talking about it, as (by sheer statistics) there are going to be guys & gals feeling down on their luck! I hope your friends are all doing alright now!

Other than the most recent two, the other people I have lost have been from a variety of different cases, car crashes, drownings, cancers (one of which was only 16 when it was first discovered) and a botched op. The suicides have def. had a massive shock factor, especially considering neither displayed (publically) the classic signs.

 

[XtheDeadPawn]

You have a lot of hatred, claiming that you hate yourself and the world around you, you claim people who commit suicide are cowards because they don't change things for the better. Do you try and change things for the better in your life? Are you doing enough?

I'm glad you are getting help and are ok (relatively speaking), but you really need to sort out the anger, loathing and hatred.

I don't claim I know because I do. I do hate myself.
Hate is a good thing those who tell you it isn't are liars you should use what you hate to push you to do things you love.

What am I doing to try and change things to be better in my life?

I'm trying to become a Medical Assistant so maybe one day I can save somebodies life and that person will go on to do something that'll save another persons life.

I am always trying to do things that'll help others. Everything I do in life is to give others who feel like they are alone and have nothing to feel wanted and not alone for feeling this way. I admit I am a bit of a walking contradiction someone fuled by hate but, wants to give hope but, this is me. I can't change who I am I've spents my entire life running from who I am I'm sick of it.

I question your friends for causing you pain and you question me for questioning your friends.

Your standing up for a person who is leaving a hole that'll never be filled again.

You need to ask yourself this: What friend would do this to me? To his familiy?

Let me tell you someone who is selfish. Life is what you make it.

I've made mine dark and I'm partly okay mostly to blame for it.

But, your friends' suicides are their doing there's nothing you or anyone can say that can deny the fact that life is what you make it.

I flunked out of college my dreams of being a childs psychologist is dead what can I do? Here's what I decided throw out the pee and make lemonade. Suicide wasn't even on the list!

So I made a decision to help people in the medical field using the skills I have to offer a Medical Assistant.
Does that sound like I'm doing enough? To caare enough about my family and friends not to cause them pain? Well I think it is.

I refuse to be a statistic people read about or hear about on the suicide hotline. I am better than those so called "victims" because instead of trying to end my life I'm trying to give others a reason to live.

Oh yeah, sure I'm not doing enough?

 

[nickbass79]

Thanks Nick, was just trying to help promote the idea of talking about it, as (by sheer statistics) there are going to be guys & gals feeling down on their luck! I hope your friends are all doing alright now!

Other than the most recent two, the other people I have lost have been from a variety of different cases, car crashes, drownings, cancers (one of which was only 16 when it was first discovered) and a botched op. The suicides have def. had a massive shock factor, especially considering neither displayed (publically) the classic signs.

All 5 are gone. It is a HUGE impact on the friends and families. All seemed to be stable. It's never easy.

 

[nickbass79]

I am always trying to do things that'll help others. Everything I do in life is to give others who feel like they are alone and have nothing to feel wanted and not alone for feeling this way. I admit I am a bit of a walking contradiction someone fuled by hate but, wants to give hope but, this is me.



So I made a decision to help people in the medical field using the skills I have to offer a Medical Assistant.
Does that sound like I'm doing enough? To caare enough about my family and friends not to cause them pain? Well I think it is.

Right on. I'm glad to hear you are doing this. I volunteer my time to help groups at the VA. Keep on helping others, hopefully it will reward you later in life.