The BIGGEST douche move onstage is...

[GlennW]

talking to the crowd with a fake English accent.

That's right, folks. The results are in from an in-depth study/survey of doucheness levels of onstage antics.

The usual contenders, music stands, shades, various hats, long coats, no shirts, flip-flops, shorts, Hawaiian shirts, bare feet, unused guitars in stands, wearing your band's logo, empty speaker cabs, and many more ALL come up short in doucheitivity when put up against the fake English accent.

It doesn't matter what else is going on or being worn onstage; when the singer talks to the crowd in a fake English accent the needle on the douche level meter gets pegged so fast it breaks.

 

[barebones]

Whew. Thought you were going to say fake Australian accent. Guess I'm in the clear!

 

[Fat Steve]

Alright, i can get behind this one. All of the other things on your list don't strike me as douchy, but talking in a fake English accent is the final straw.

 

[Biggbass]

This ranks right up there with gigging in a plaid short sleeved shirt and khaki docker shorts.

 

[SoVeryTired]

But real ones are okay, yes?

 

[davidjackson]

Hey - I've got a real English accent - does that make me cool?

I had no idea anybody would ever try and sound English to sound cool. What's that about?

 

[SoVeryTired]

Hey - I've got a real English accent - does that make me cool?

I had no idea anybody would ever try and sound English to sound cool. What's that about?

I clearly need to move to the US because I'm almost dangerously uncool here.

And seriously, people would do this?

Mind you, many English singers put on an American accent...

 

[5StringBlues]

RIGHT!



Wots all this then?






EDIT: 'Ello Guvna!

 

[pklima]

I dunno if that's the biggest. I once talked about how the lyrics to the next song mean a lot to all of us in the band on a deep personal level, and then sang "I'm Too Sexy".

 

[PatQ]

Using german words like "kaputt" and "schlepp" is a bit douchy, too. But yeah, I was laughing about a pic online that had "This is a Schlachtschiff, it schlachts Schiff" written on it... makes you wonder where that words originally came from

Edit: I live in a city called "Siegburg", oh dear...

 

[rodl2005]

A REAL Australian accent.



Ok, better put in a so ppl know I'm joking ( & Australian)

 

[hdracer]

I had no idea anybody would ever try and sound English to sound cool. What's that about?

Have you heard Madonna lately?

:scowl:

 

[Awesome Sauce]

talking to the crowd with a fake English accent.

That's right, folks. The results are in from an in-depth study/survey of doucheness levels of onstage antics.

The usual contenders, music stands, shades, various hats, long coats, no shirts, flip-flops, shorts, Hawaiian shirts, bare feet, unused guitars in stands, wearing your band's logo, empty speaker cabs, and many more ALL come up short in doucheitivity when put up against the fake English accent.

It doesn't matter what else is going on or being worn onstage; when the singer talks to the crowd in a fake English accent the needle on the douche level meter gets pegged so fast it breaks.

I clearly need to move to the US because I'm almost dangerously uncool here.

And seriously, people would do this?

Mind you, many English singers put on an American accent...

I see you're fake accent posts and raise you an Englishman using a fake English accent! PENULTIMATE DOUCHEBAGGERY SIR!!! Muahahaha!

By the way, I don't have time, so someone start a 'Douchebag Poker' Thread- this could get good.

Cheers,

Rob

 

[timber22]

Hey - I've got a real English accent - does that make me cool?

I had no idea anybody would ever try and sound English to sound cool. What's that about?

I notice it all the time. They use narrators for TV shows or TV commercials with English (or sometimes Australian) accents apparently to sound cool, not just in the live music world.

 

[sxaxsx]

Have you heard Madonna lately?

:scowl:

Or Billy Joe Armstrong ever, desperately trying to sound like the Clash.

 

[grey area]

we do a version of hollywood nights indian style called BOLLYWOOD NIGHTS and i do it with a fake mumbai( bombay)accent. i spend a bit of time there so i can do a fair impression. we think its a hoot, would this be considered douche?

ps i am a cockney londoner by birth.

 

[verycoolname]

Not a musician, but a girl I know has British parents, but she was born/raised in America. Both of her siblings speak with "American" accents (what are those, exactly?), so many people believe she fakes it in an attempt to be more "unique." I'm kind of iffy on it, but if she does indeed fake it that makes here a douche to the nth degree.

And yeah, several pop icons (Madonna, Lady Gaga, and, yes, Billy Joe Armstong) fake British accents for whatever reason.

 

[remainthesame]

I had no idea anybody would ever try and sound English to sound cool. What's that about?

Because Americans aren't the smartest people (I'm american so don't flame me) and for some reason, the majority of them are fascinated by the sound of an English accent.

I don't know what the cause is, but I'd be willing to wager money that it happened somewhere between the british invasion and harry potter. Not quite sure exactly though.

 

[Eric_71]

I notice it all the time. They use narrators for TV shows or TV commercials with English (or sometimes Australian) accents apparently to sound cool, not just in the live music world.

At a previous job, we were told that the marketing videos were done with British accents because the American public tended to respond better to videos narrated by someone with that sort of accent. Apparently that's what market research has shown throughout the years.

I don't remember all of the details of it -- it could have been that it was a bias in any English-speaking person, though I thought it was specifically Americans.

 

[5StringBlues]

I'd be willing to wager money that it happened somewhere between the british invasion and harry potter. Not quite sure exactly though.

Monty Python