Tip jar at private party?

[bluewine]

Video of you guys doing the "Chicken Dance" song or it didn't happen.

I'm not even sure why anyone would hire a blues /rock band for a wedding.I think the couple getting married likes the band, but to me that's not a good reason to use our type of music at a wedding party. Doesn't seem like a good idea to me.

Chicken dance, thats not gonna happen.But I will post some pics.

Blue

 

[two fingers]

You need to learn how to say no to jobs that don’t pay enough.

Nope. I have that move perfected. It is the OP who may need to practice it. I can say no before the booking agent or perspective client even finishes the sentence.

(And, by the way, I don't play for hotels rooms, beer, food, or other "free services". Money only and plenty of it..... unless, of course, I'm playing a benefit.)

 

[Downunderwonder]

I am not sure, but I think the kicking of the tip jar refers to the private party my band played Saturday. Which was a classy private party that we play every year. It wasn't any where near $3,500.00 but well over $1,000.00.

Me and the poster have a difference of opinion, we did use our tip container.

Blue

No, the kicking over comment was about the highlighted quote about the upcoming rare wedding. Dead straight, you should bring that up ahead of time, just in case the rest of the band are drongo hustlers. Weddings pay big money, even in WI I'm sure.

I have to wonder if the chicken that laid the tip jar was the low paying gig or the other way around.

 

[Stumbo]

All restaurants, even the high end ones, allow tips or even include an % gratuity on the bill.

 

[Joe Louvar]

Nope. I have that move perfected. It is the OP who may need to practice it. I can say no before the booking agent or perspective client even finishes the sentence.

(And, by the way, I don't play for hotels rooms, beer, food, or other "free services". Money only and plenty of it..... unless, of course, I'm playing a benefit.)

Great - tell the OP.

 

[modulusman]

All restaurants, even the high end ones, allow tips or even include an % gratuity on the bill.

Yet I have never seen one where it asks you on the bill whether you want to tip the band.

 

[Joedog]

Maybe it varies by region (sounds like it). Here, for weddings, corporate gigs, and festivals....no. Clubs, bars, absolutely. Private parties, it's best to ask permission, but never had a problem whatsoever, always get a "sure, put it out there!" We always seemed to get the best/most tips at private parties.

 

[Joe Louvar]

I am not sure, but I think the kicking of the tip jar refers to the private party my band played Saturday. Which was a classy private party that we play every year. It wasn't any where near $3,500.00 but well over $1,000.00.

Me and the poster have a difference of opinion, we did use our tip container.

Blue

No Blue, it was just a general reference to classy private parties and more specifically what might happen if someone setup a tip jar at a wedding.

FWIW: There will always be hustlers who setup tip jars and there will always be class acts that NEVER setup a tip jar!!!

 

[COBRARI]

We played at a spring time flea market with just a tip jar and someone put a gold ring in it. We let the guitar player have it. He sold it and made a few bucks.
If you are playing a "paid gig"...
the tip jar might be a little tacky.
If someone hands you $5.00 to play a certain song, that's different. Take it.

 

[RustyAxe]

As for kicking my tip jar...... If you were rich, and tried to get me to play your backyard party for $300, I would personally hang up the phone, drive to your house, and shove my tip jar up your.........

Really? Quite the tough guy, huh. No one makes you accept any offer ... just say no. Look, no matter what the pay is (the band accepted the pay, didn't they?) it's just not cool at a private function to dun a host's guests for tips, and that's what the presence of a tip jar does. The difference between the bands that do, and the bands that don't is called professionalism.

 

[modulusman]

Really? Quite the tough guy, huh. No one makes you accept any offer ... just say no. Look, no matter what the pay is (the band accepted the pay, didn't they?) it's just not cool at a private function to dun a host's guests for tips, and that's what the presence of a tip jar does. The difference between the bands that do, and the bands that don't is called professionalism.

Exactly. But two fingers is so special that he would need $3500.00 to play a private party. My guess is he doesn't play any ever.

 

[Joe Louvar]

No one makes you accept any offer ... just say no. Look, no matter what the pay is (the band accepted the pay, didn't they?) it's just not cool at a private function to dun a host's guests for tips, and that's what the presence of a tip jar does. The difference between the bands that do, and the bands that don't is called professionalism.

+1. Yep.

 

[troy mcclure]

No tip jar for a private party, unless the person running the party actually suggests it... if you are playing an upscale wedding ..no if you are playing a back yard family reunion where everyone is yelling FREEBIRD than you might ask the host who is under paying you and you did a favor by playing the gig if they wouldn't mind passing a jar.

 

[bluewine]

No Blue, it was just a general reference to classy private parties and more specifically what might happen if someone setup a tip jar at a wedding.

FWIW: There will always be hustlers who setup tip jars and there will always be class acts that NEVER setup a tip jar!!!

I think it depends on the circumstance of the event.

In my case the band plays this party every year and one of the band members is friends with the hosts.We have always used a tip container.

For the wedding we have coming up next month, my position will be no tip container.

Class Act, thats relative IMO.

Blue

 

[Joe Louvar]

For the wedding we have coming up next month, my position will be no tip container.

+1.

 

[Southpaw5]

Good for those of you who are "classy" enough to never use a tip jar. Bravo. If its that simple to you, you won't help the OP. Perhaps you're more well established or just more well off that the money doesn't matter to you. You're just rubbing salt in the wound, good for you.

It all depends on the situation, but one thing I will say is that no one hosting a party wants to see your tip jar because it makes them look cheap. In this case its accurate, but that's the bottom line. Its a passive aggressive way of asking for more money than agreed. Sometimes its the only way to cover you AZZ( and bills).

The one booking doesn't seem to good at it though OP, I'd say someone else in the band should be in charge of negotiating the pay.

 

[jmattbassplaya]

Really? Quite the tough guy, huh. No one makes you accept any offer ... just say no. Look, no matter what the pay is (the band accepted the pay, didn't they?) it's just not cool at a private function to dun a host's guests for tips, and that's what the presence of a tip jar does. The difference between the bands that do, and the bands that don't is called professionalism.

No it's not. Professionalism is showing up and doing the gig you've been hired to do, on time, and with extreme craftsmanship. If the person contracting you is cool with using a tip jar then you're just as professional as the next band.

 

[nojj]

My blues/classic rock band does an occasional wedding.

Don't see a lot of tip jar action around here at regular gigs,
but have at the open stages.

 

[two fingers]

Exactly. But two fingers is so special that he would need $3500.00 to play a private party. My guess is he doesn't play any ever.

Actually, I only do fill-in gigs these days. I quit bands with the birth of my second child. That was a few years ago.

In that band that I quit then, we never played a private party for under $3500 for the last three years I was in that band. Many weddings got upwards of $5000. If you don't price yourself as valuable, you won't be valuable. The market is out there but most bands just don't want to put forth the effort, or risk pissing people off by turning down gigs, that it takes to get to that point. You have to put out a great product, and be willing to say no once your product is great. Who wouldn't rather play 4 gigs in a month for $14,000 than do 8 club gigs for way less than ten grand? The second plan seems stupid. But maybe that's just me. Music is a business AND an art to me. If I want a hobby I'll take up surfing.

By the way, we never did a Saturday club for less than $2200, or a Friday club for less than $1800. And there was no such thing as a gig of ANY kind (I don't care if it was Tuesday afternoon in our hometown one set with provided PA) that was less than $1500. Period. And our calendar stayed full the whole time I was in the band.

 

[two fingers]

Really? Quite the tough guy, huh. No one makes you accept any offer ... just say no. Look, no matter what the pay is (the band accepted the pay, didn't they?) it's just not cool at a private function to dun a host's guests for tips, and that's what the presence of a tip jar does. The difference between the bands that do, and the bands that don't is called professionalism.

Hey I put a smiley winky doohicky up there! Isn't that TB talk for "just kidding"? Man, I gotta read up on my smiley doohickies. I never dreamed that a guy who clicked on a smiley thingy was trying to be "tough". Clearly, you grew up in a girly man neighborhood. This >< ain't tough.

Anyhoooooo........

We agreed on the stupid fee of $300 way back on the first page. Agreeing to the gig for that was dumb. My point was that there was nothing classy or formal about a $300 party. When you only paid that, you tossed out "professionalism". You got your friends to play a backyard jam. "Private party professionalism" rules don't apply. They did NOT PAY FOR a PROFESSIONAL BAND.

If I pay my pool guy $10 per visit, I don't expect him to do anything extra. Even though he agreed to that fee, I don't have high expectations (and I shouldn't). The usual "rules" of what we expect from pool guys do not apply. He won't do an amazingly awesome job. And he shouldn't for that much. And I should not EXPECT him to.

If I pay my cleaning lady $45 to do the whole house, she is not going to lift the couch and vacuum under it. If I want her to, I will have to pay more. Sure, she may have agreed to do the whole house for $45, but if I pay that my expectations CAN NOT be HIGH. The usual rules of house cleaning expectations do not exist here.

$10 haircut? Not awesome. AND they expect a tip.

$1 hotdog? Not amazing. AND they expect a tip.

Just because something has been "agreed to", you still have to factor in REASONABLE EXPECTATIONS. For the cheap ###holes to actually expect a band to set up in their yard, play four hours, tear it all down, and sound great for $300 is UNREASONABLE (again, EVEN IF the band agreed to it). So, the cheap ###holes should shut up and let the band put out a tip jar. If THEY are too cheap to pay for a band, perhaps the GUESTS will appreciate the band enough to pay them.

By the way, how many smiley doohickies do I have to stick here for everybody to remain calm?
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