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Turning down a band politely

#42
MultiScaleMale said:
I'm looking for a band with little success, all other bands, I've just fallen into the right circumstance at the right time. Not lately, so I did the unthinkable and posted a bassist available thread in the local Maryland Musicians Wanted FB page. Not expecting much there, but quickly got a hit from someone that's looking for a bassist for their group with a drummer and clarinet player. Uh, nah, would rather sell all my gear and take up photography. But he kept sending me links of his music, which he was probably proud of so I needed to come up with a polite "Thanks, but no thanks". It was:

"We're on different musical journeys. I don't think there is a mutual fit. Thanks for sharing!"

What's your nice way of saying "Hell no!"?
Click to expand...
“It’s not a style of music that I enjoy playing, so I’m going to pass. But thank you for the opportunity.”
 
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#43
MultiScaleMale said:
I'm looking for a band with little success, all other bands, I've just fallen into the right circumstance at the right time. Not lately, so I did the unthinkable and posted a bassist available thread in the local Maryland Musicians Wanted FB page. Not expecting much there, but quickly got a hit from someone that's looking for a bassist for their group with a drummer and clarinet player. Uh, nah, would rather sell all my gear and take up photography. But he kept sending me links of his music, which he was probably proud of so I needed to come up with a polite "Thanks, but no thanks". It was:

"We're on different musical journeys. I don't think there is a mutual fit. Thanks for sharing!"

What's your nice way of saying "Hell no!"?
Click to expand...
Your answer is perfect, polite but honest.
 
#46
MultiScaleMale said:
I'm looking for a band with little success, all other bands, I've just fallen into the right circumstance at the right time. Not lately, so I did the unthinkable and posted a bassist available thread in the local Maryland Musicians Wanted FB page. Not expecting much there, but quickly got a hit from someone that's looking for a bassist for their group with a drummer and clarinet player. Uh, nah, would rather sell all my gear and take up photography. But he kept sending me links of his music, which he was probably proud of so I needed to come up with a polite "Thanks, but no thanks". It was:

"We're on different musical journeys. I don't think there is a mutual fit. Thanks for sharing!"

What's your nice way of saying "Hell no!"?
Click to expand...

Thank you but thank you, yet thank you very much.
 
#49
I think you handled it well OP although I am not a fan of the word "journey." Everything seems to be described as a journey lately. Spiritual journey. Fitness journey etc. It just rubs me the wrong way.

I give a compliment about the music that is genuine and then say that I don't think what I am looking for fits with the type of music the prospective band/artist is going for. There is no need to be terse which is essentially rude unless the other party is rude. In which case, I would be more terse but not rude.
 
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#51
I recently went to audition an acoustic group. Great guys, talented and very happy with me thinking I was staying on. I dug the songs as they were mostly different from the genres I work in. I'm currently steady with a few groups and do an enough amount of sub work to be satisfied. This was just to scratch an itch with an open hole round these months...blah blah back to the 1st thing. I did give it serious thought and had a 2nd get together on the calendar. Prior to that date I decided against cuz of a few reasons and I told him straight up what my concerns/issues were. He was bummed but totally understood even though one of those issues was their lackadaisical tempo. They did not want to add a percussionist or drums as I suggested. I don't think it was a money thing as these cats are in their 60's and settled, comfortable in their lives, yet they were fine with their untemponess of it. But anyway, we were both open and honest with each other about what we both wanted and we understood each other. I have an open invite from them to come back any time even if just for a drink and laffs. That's the way I handle things. I don't want to hurt anyone or say anything negative about their artistic endeavors as we all roll down different paths. And also ya never know who they might know or when your musical paths may cross again. And of course both parties must have mutual chill or this sh*t wouldn't have been as smooth. Enjoy!
 
#52
MultiScaleMale said:
I'm looking for a band with little success, all other bands, I've just fallen into the right circumstance at the right time. Not lately, so I did the unthinkable and posted a bassist available thread in the local Maryland Musicians Wanted FB page. Not expecting much there, but quickly got a hit from someone that's looking for a bassist for their group with a drummer and clarinet player. Uh, nah, would rather sell all my gear and take up photography. But he kept sending me links of his music, which he was probably proud of so I needed to come up with a polite "Thanks, but no thanks". It was:

"We're on different musical journeys. I don't think there is a mutual fit. Thanks for sharing!"

What's your nice way of saying "Hell no!"?
Click to expand...
Nothing wrong with that.

There are only two answers to a request to join, and both parties need to be aware of this.

1) "Sure, lets get together to see if it works!"

2) "We're on different musical journeys. I don't think there is a mutual fit. Thanks for sharing!"

:)
 
#56
Since you posted yourself as available, I would just say "I don't think this the best fit right now, thank you for your consideration."

If you hadn't posted yourself as available and just got approached, I always just say I'm spread too thin with my current projects.
 
#57
“ I enjoy clarinet music but I don’t think it needs me on electric bass. Thanks for considering me and best of luck finding a good fit!”

Besides I don’t think that’s enough wind players to do Benny Goodman justice.
 

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