I'll start:
You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him put the shower curtain inside the tub.
You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him put the shower curtain inside the tub.
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Weird things my dad used to say.
- Thread starter Cut the middle
- Start date
“The first place you go blind is in the eyes.”
Still don’t know what that means...
Still don’t know what that means...
Maybe not weird but "You kids could tear up an anvil with a rubber mallet."
"Your freedom stops at the next person's nose." - his way of explaining both being a good person when I was little and his own political views. He means you can and should have the right to do whatever you want until it affects the people around you.
Stop that! It'll cause your babies to be born naked!
"If wishes were horses, beggars would ride" I always thought that was a little heartless of him.
Geezer stepdad: kid, there are nine people in this world that are out to get you.
12 year old me: nine people, that’s not so bad.
Geezer stepdad: yup, NINE OUT OF TEN.
Geezer me thinks that he gave the world the benefit of the doubt.
12 year old me: nine people, that’s not so bad.
Geezer stepdad: yup, NINE OUT OF TEN.
Geezer me thinks that he gave the world the benefit of the doubt.
If it wasn't good, they wouldn't put it in a can and sell it.
Hmm...how do I clean this up for a family-oriented forum?
It took me a while to piece everything together, but many years after his passing, I finally "got it." I suppose the final abridged translation would be something like: "Just because you'll eventually have the physiological ability to impregnate a woman won't automatically qualify you to be a father."
It took me a while to piece everything together, but many years after his passing, I finally "got it." I suppose the final abridged translation would be something like: "Just because you'll eventually have the physiological ability to impregnate a woman won't automatically qualify you to be a father."
When I was a youngster and wanted to do something that took me out of my comfort zone, my dad would say “Do it! You don’t have any hooks in your @$$, or trees in your way”.
My dad told me once, “You can’t tell when a good musician is sick.”
I wasn’t a singer. I played guitar at the time. He was giving me advice when I was a teenage guitarist and baritonist. My dad was a first chair trumpet player and a rocker back in the day. I guess it isn’t that weird, my bad. He was just giving me advice. I should have read the thread Title closer.
If you can't stay seated in church, you won't be able to sit down after we get home!
Good one! (for a Black Sabbath fan!
)Never start a sentence with if!
Or in German: Wenn das Wôrtchen 'wenn' nicht wâr, wâr mein Vater Millionär
If the word 'if' did not exist...
One of my dad's favs! And who would not prefer that?
greetings
Wise
If makes the sentence conditional, so if I didn't sit down I'd get my ass tanned with a belt at home.
We use IF as the beginning all the time in programming:
If
Then
Else
We use IF as the beginning all the time in programming:
If
Then
Else
[speaking about someone of low smarts]
"They could screw up a free lunch counter."
"They could screw up a free lunch counter."
When you keep complaining about how you want something:
"Keep wanting in one hand, and crap in the other. Tell me which fills up first".
"Keep wanting in one hand, and crap in the other. Tell me which fills up first".
I grew my hair and listened to loud rock to shock my dad,my little brother was clever! He studied IT!
