This gets me curious: what questions do real customers ask? That is, if you're at liberty to say, of course.
The most obvious was "Does it come with a case?"
But they were always questions about the "deal".
"Can I get a new set of strings on it?"
"If I buy it can you lower the action a little?"
"Is that the best you can do on the price?"
Tire kickers always asked questions about knobs and switches, where the bass was manufactured, etc. They also asked questions about other people's gear. "What do you play?" and that kind of thing. It was never a question about buying the bass (or guitar, or keyboard, or whatever).
Another thing a serious customer would do is ask for my name. They would say something like "I'm gonna play around on this for a sec. I'll ask for you when I'm ready to buy."