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Farting during a show

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jive1

jive1

Commercial User
Jan 16, 2003
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Alexandria,VA
www.jivesound.com
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#1
I know it happens, so share your stories.

We were playing for the Guiness Tap at a local Irish pub a few years back. During one of the songs that I sang, I let one rip. Couldn't help it, had to do it. As I was singing, the fumes made their way to my nose and I busted out laughing. I look over behind me, and the rest of the band was back against the wall to get away from my stench. One guitar player looks at me and mutters "You a$$hole". The drummer, who couldn't get away from me had the most sour look on his face.

There have been other gigs where I have let em rip too. Unintentionally of course ;) . My favorite target is the drummer. It's easy since I usually stand by the hihat. But, if the stage is big enough, I'm more than happy to walk over and share with others on the other side of the stage too. It looks like I'm rocking out with the other band members, but really I'm reaking out. Sometimes, I can get away with it and have the other band members blaming each other.

Yup, I've been a jerk when I was younger. Once in a while I'd walk by a guy who's trying to chat up a girl, and let it rip and continue walking away. Watching the couple's faces and awkwardness made for some laughable moments for me and my bandmates during our breaks.

I only do stupid stuff like that with bands that I have been working with for a while. I'd never to that when I'm subbing or playing a casual, and definitely not in the studio.

This is the humor and gig stories forum, so let er rip! :D
 
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#2
So YOU are my twin!

I usually walk over to my guitar player if I have to fart. The crowd has no idea.

When we are in the van I'll try my best to hold them in. When we are in the band accommodations I usually throw the fart at them.

If I am going to be labelled the bass player I am going to play the part. :spit:

There should be a smilie of a farting bassist, btw.
 
#5
I play for a band that is one of the Housebands at Billy Bob's in Fort Worth, TX. We play WED-SAT, and the food at the restaurant is half price.

To make a long story short, after a Wed, Thurs, Friday of onion rings, Chili Cheese fries, buffalo wings, lots of draft beer, etc... by Saturday you cannot stand to be on the same stage as me.

On a past occasion I have had a singer say into the Mic.."Jimmie is that you, you $^#&* sick $@*%&$&!"
 
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#8
yeah... I've absolutely lost count of how many times I've fogged out the bandstand during gigs.

I'm usually closest to the drummer when those things happen... I think: 'hey, at least he has a fan back there...'
 
#9
Drummer is always a captive target. I usually try to get the singer when he's also playing acoustic and can't step away from the mic when singing.

We usually try to keep it to ourselves, but unfortunately one of the guys let one go a few weeks ago at a private function country club gig, high dollar affair, when we were set up on the floor with the people were right up on us. Brick House wouldn't even have filled THAT dancefloor . . . :hmm:
 
#10
When I was in college marching band we went on a trip to play the halftime show for a Minnesota Vikings game. During practice before the show, a handful of other guys in the drumline (who hated the Vikings) were farting as much as they could, in hopes that it would affect Warren Moon's game.

The best performance farting story I ever heard was in the Aerosmith autobiography ("Walk This Way"). The story was that Tyler wanted their manager to get him some amount of cocaine or he wouldn't go onstage. Not wanting Steven to pass out mid-show, the manager called one of the band's dealers and got a few grams of Mannitol instead. Mannitol apparently is used both as a substance for cutting cocaine and as a baby laxative.

So showtime is nigh and Tyler asks manager for his lines in the limo on the way to the venue. He manages to crack one off in the limo, to the chagrin of his wife. By the time Aerosmith is onstage, Tyler is farting almost constantly.

At the end of the chapter, Tyler says that the story is complete BS. But what a great practical joke on the manager's part if it's true. :)
 
#11
I roasted one of my best ever at a quiet coffee shop, I mean this one qualified for the all star series of gas in terms of how horrible.

That's too quiet/uptight of a setting for that. The singers face turned as red as a tomato.

Priceless.
 
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