Funny story about that. I've had quite a good run, musically, especially for a self-taught guy who lives in VT... I've been playing for 36 years now... jammed with Bernie Worrell, opened up for John Scofield at the headlining of the big jazz fest up here, a few other great things. By and large, I don't get stage fright. Once I hear the applause (you know, not nightclub applause, where you hear individual people - theater applause where it's a big unified sound) after our first song at the Sco show, I never got it again. Not playing to thousands at festivals, or for opening up for famous people. I even held my own with Keith Jarrett's kid, who's one of the best damn drummers in the northeast. not nervous, excited.....Until...
Most of you know I started doing that synth thing with my duo, and had a few little synth gatherings, attended by maybe 30 people, back in January, again in Feb.
My damn legs were SHAKING. Like Elvis, when they wouldn't show his hips on tv in the 50's shaking. Like Ren in Ren and Stimpy when he was losing touch with reality. Dry mouth. The sweats.
Yeah, 30 people, in a tiny VT town, in some small community arts center, 15 minutes, not really playing something technically difficult, and I was scared crapless. Why? Because this was MY baby. Yeah, my basslines in a band are my baby, as are a few of the songs some bands have played, but that's not really personal in the same way. This was coming from a place deep inside me, and I and my duo partner were the focus, not 6 band members and a huge horn section, where I can blend into the background.
And when we got the biggest applause of the night, all was well, again, but damn, when you're out there naked like that, it's not easy. Putting stuff out is like that, too.