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BL moved the goalposts!#$&!

Lance Bunyon

Lance Bunyon

Jul 17, 2018
4,891
10,628
#1
Greetings!
BL and me get along pretty well. In the past year, about half our gigs have shifted from trio to duo based on cheap venues with no room and a drummer who hits like John Bonham.
Last night was one of those duo shows. We were contracted to play 7 to 10 for $200 ($100 apiece).
During soundcheck, a patron dropped a $20 bill in BLs guitar case and asked us to extend the soundcheck by 2 or 3 songs.
BL turned it into a 4th set!

When I jestured for soundcheck to end he wanted to negotiate on mic through the PA.
I backed off, I've been gigging 30 years and we don't air dirty laundry on mic over the PA.
Throughout the evening BL treated me like a crippled octogenarian. "Do you need an actual break? I can just stay here and play solo if you need an actual break..."

Dude needs major lessons in managing other people. I've been playing with him for over 7 years and I'm aware of his disconnect - he's deeply afraid that if we sit down all the patrons will leave the pub.
I need to have a talk with him without yelling (or choking him lol!).
By the end of the gig I expressed my thoughts a little. Clocks were changing and I sing Mass in choir and I had an 80 minute drive home (cause I needed to fuel up at BK on the way home).
This isn't the first time he's pushed the boundaries way beyond the pale.
I'm almost 58 and I really don't want to start over with another band.
Thing is, in the trio version of our band the drummer and I keep BL in check.
I gotta set a boundary but I don't want to quit...
 
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#2
Lance Bunyon said:
"Do you need an actual break?
Click to expand...

20 year old me would’ve immediately swatted him across the face, packed up and walked out with the $20 without engaging in anything even slightly resembling a conversation. Current me would have the self respect & restraint to keep my hands to myself, pack up, grab the $20, and walk out without engaging in anything even slightly resembling a conversation.

music absolutely should not resemble being on a 1910’s manufacturing floor.
 
Last edited:
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#3
MattZilla said:
20 year old me would’ve immediately swatted him across the face, packed up and walked out with the $20 without engaging in anything even slightly resembling a conversation. Current me would have the self respect & restraint to keep my hands to myself, pack up, grab the $20, and walk out without engaging in anything even slightly resembling a conversation.

music absolutely should not resemble being on a 1910’s manufacturing floor.
Click to expand...
Mostly agreed. We ended up with $95 in tips (great crowd!). I'll probably enlist the drummer in this RockNRoll Intervention ™.
Drummer is six foot four and 300 lbs of bone and muscle. BL will listen.
 
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#4
Lance Bunyon said:
Greetings!
BL and me get along pretty well. In the past year, about half our gigs have shifted from trio to duo based on cheap venues with no room and a drummer who hits like John Bonham.
Last night was one of those duo shows. We were contracted to play 7 to 10 for $200 ($100 apiece).
During soundcheck, a patron dropped a $20 bill in BLs guitar case and asked us to extend the soundcheck by 2 or 3 songs.
BL turned it into a 4th set!

When I jestured for soundcheck to end he wanted to negotiate on mic through the PA.
I backed off, I've been gigging 30 years and we don't air dirty laundry on mic over the PA.
Throughout the evening BL treated me like a crippled octogenarian. "Do you need an actual break? I can just stay here and play solo if you need an actual break..."

Dude needs major lessons in managing other people. I've been playing with him for over 7 years and I'm aware of his disconnect - he's deeply afraid that if we sit down all the patrons will leave the pub.
I need to have a talk with him without yelling (or choking him lol!).
By the end of the gig I expressed my thoughts a little. Clocks were changing and I sing Mass in choir and I had an 80 minute drive home (cause I needed to fuel up at BK on the way home).
This isn't the first time he's pushed the boundaries way beyond the pale.
I'm almost 58 and I really don't want to start over with another band.
Thing is, in the trio version of our band the drummer and I keep BL in check.
I gotta set a boundary but I don't want to quit...
Click to expand...

Not breaking is a pet peeve of mine, so totally get you. Sound checking for too long as another pet peeve. Even the audience needs a break.
 
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#8
Lance Bunyon said:
I gotta set a boundary but I don't want to quit...
Click to expand...
0000.jpg

Lance Bunyon said:
set a boundary
Click to expand...
 
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#10
As has been said many times in many ways in many different contexts: "Life is short"

It is sometimes embellished to add: "Life is too short to waste any of it"

If you don't need the money, leave. If you do need the money, find another gig and then leave. The so-called "leader" is not going to have an epiphany.
 
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#13
Played a birthday party last night. At the agreed upon ending time I started to pack up. The BL said something to the effect of "Should we play more?", which was more a request than a question. I replied "Believe it or not, I have other plans tonight beyond this gig." It's absolutely ludicrous for BL's (or club owners) to view gigs as open-ended arrangements, yet they do so on a regular. Same with breaks. I told a singer recently "Try standing for an hour and a half with a 10 pound weight across your shoulder and then you might understand." I know I'm irascible, and I could, perhaps, use some "well learned politesse", but I REALLY don't suffer fools, especially inconsiderate ones, lightly.

BBB
 
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#17
Lance Bunyon said:
I've been playing with him for over 7 years and I'm aware of his disconnect - he's deeply afraid that if we sit down all the patrons will leave the pub.
Click to expand...

Sounds like you might have seen situations like this before, maybe in the first couple years or so? If you want to keep playing with this individual, you’re probably just going to have to learn to like is, because if you haven’t addressed this kind of behavior in “over 7 years”, you’re probably not going to fix it now.
 
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#18
So, let’s say your sound check was at 7 and actual start time was 8. Someone drops a $20 and you play from 7 to 8 rather than hang out and enjoy the pre-show time to yourself? Your half of the $20 is $10 for an extra hour of playing? Is the band leader smoking crack or does he just love the sound of his own voice that much? I’d have walked off the stage and said I’d be back at 8.
 
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#19
I'd sit out the "almost free sample" and let him earn the $20. After the gig and away from prying ears and hot mics, I'd suggest a meeting to establish guidelines regarding any such occurrences in the future. It's always best to take the high road, but packing the brass knuckles isn't always a bad idea, either.
 

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