Cavalry

[David Jayne]

Cleaning up English



The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.


As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".


In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.


The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.


There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.


In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.


Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.


Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.


By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".


During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.


Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.


Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.




If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.

 

[FilterFunk]

Langwij is constuntly eevolving. In a cupple hunnert yeers evrything we sey now wil seem lyke sum aynshunt tung.

TextSpeek is tha langwij uf the fewchur.

Interesting...but it still doesn't excuse improper written and/or spoken language TODAY.

 

[ZenG]

Interesting...but it still doesn't excuse improper written and/or spoken language TODAY.

It's obsolete. Same as going out and learning BASIC for computer.

In the future we will communicate by ThoughtSpeak amongst other things.

In the same way you communicate a message to an animal like a dog or cat. Neither of those understand English..so anything you say is, pardon the pun, Greek to them basically.
But they can pick up on your intent and emotional level by the sound of your voice.

Telepathically all they really need is your "mode of thought"...that is, you are conveying a message without actually using words.
You are transmitting a descriptive mental state.

Once we humans hone this concept and technology we will send messages to each other based on the image and meaning of our conscious imagination, using thought pictures, "states of mind", emotional levels,and the relative importance of factual information.......bundled in a "thought package' that is immediately translatable without the clunky process of "word transcription".

The King's English was really created for those scholars and professors at old-time English universities who had nothing better to do than sandbag around the school all day parsing sentences and conjugating verbs.
Writing as they knew it worked.......but the written word is tediously slow really.
All we've ever done is try and speed up the writing process technologically...and you can only go so far with that.

We haven't tried to change the process itself to any great degree..

Being grammatically correct only counts because we have come to believe it does.
But ultra-speed ultra-level communication isn't about being grammatically correct...it's about communication.

 

[96tbird]

• Plusbad. Nay, doubleplusbad. Doubleplusunsusinct. Pluswide open to plusmisinterpretation causing doublepluschaos.

 

[ZenG]

Which do you "get" faster:-

This:. "There appears to be coming your way some form of deadly dangerous event or product"

or this:.

 

[96tbird]

I get this from that.

You should see my Rorschach associations.

 

[96tbird]

Which is better?

 

[ZenG]

The bigger pic on the left. The one on the right obscures the purity of violence by convoluting it with banality.

 

[One Drop]

Which do you "get" faster:-

This:. "There appears to be coming your way some form of deadly dangerous event or product"

or this:.

View attachment 753919

'Dangerous' works pretty well, but those symbols are meant to be understood by the illiterate or speakers of different languages.

In fact the limits of using symbols for expressing anything but the simplest thoughts are shown by your very example- the new set of warning symbols based on the different dangers that products pose is so complex that many people probably don't know what many mean.

Language and how and why we use it, and how it relate to thought, is extremely complex, and fascinating. I think we think complex thoughts and reason certain ways because language dictates this and not the other way around.

 

[-Asdfgh-]

Why is it ok to just say stuff wrong these days? Lazy.

Such reversals of consonants are common in the development of language, so it seems to be something hard-wired in our brains, so it probably isn't laziness, just an in-built predisposition for it to happen that some succumb to. Once set, hard to break.

 

[ChrisB2]

uf

TYPO!!! HAHAHAHA!!!

You meant to say "uv" DUH!!

-brought to you courtesy of the TBOT grammar/spelling/manners police...

 

[96tbird]

The bigger pic on the left. The one on the right obscures the purity of violence by convoluting it with banality.

Edit:,. !!!

 

[Darth Handsome]

My back is grabbing. I hurt it shoveling snow this morning. I like the prairies and all but sometimes we take it on the chin. The universe balances itself out.

 

[96tbird]

Snow Removal and Clearing Services in Winnipeg | White Out Snow Removal

Call these guys and ask them to blow you snow.

Hey you guys are right! Dropping consonants is excellent! It doesn't change meaning at all!

 

[FilterFunk]

Symbols work well in certain circumstances, but as One Drop so aptly put it, "In fact the limits of using symbols for expressing anything but the simplest thoughts are shown by your very example- the new set of warning symbols based on the different dangers that products pose is so complex that many people probably don't know what many mean."

I keep reading about how language was in the past, and how it may be in the future. That's fine, but because of easily accessible information today, we don't need to guess how words are spelled or pronounced today, or speculate about punctuation and grammar as it stands now. Language will continue to change in due course, and we'll continue to adapt to it, but general communication requires a general set of standards.

 

[ZenG]

TYPO!!! HAHAHAHA!!!

You meant to say "uv" DUH!!

-brought to you courtesy of the TBOT grammar/spelling/manners police...

Where did I mean to say that...?

 

[ZenG]

My back is grabbing. I hurt it shoveling snow this morning. I like the prairies and all but sometimes we take it on the chin. The universe balances itself out.

A mans got to know his limitations..

 

[ZenG]

'Dangerous' works pretty well, but those symbols are meant to be understood by the illiterate or speakers of different languages.

In fact the limits of using symbols for expressing anything but the simplest thoughts are shown by your very example- the new set of warning symbols based on the different dangers that products pose is so complex that many people probably don't know what many mean.

Language and how and why we use it, and how it relate to thought, is extremely complex, and fascinating. I think we think complex thoughts and reason certain ways because language dictates this and not the other way around.

I have no idea what you're talking about...

 

[Hoff Kinkmeister]

It's like when people call magazines clips, just throws my whole day off.

 

[Hoff Kinkmeister]

People say "It's on tape!" referring to Video. Nothing is anymore. I have been correcting people for many years about the Cavalry thing. I'm glad it's not just me. Another one people say "At the same token" instead of "By the same token", or "irregardless"- I don't think it's a word.

Fight the good fight brother!