Enjoy the benefits of a premium membership!
Upgrade Account
-
TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
Join free Log in
Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.
Deep philosophical question
- Thread starter neo 7
- Start date
But they do state their opinions about the potential of the future of humanity. Homosapiens do anyway. Probably not our fellow apes like gorillas and chimpanzees.
Here's an interesting read on the rationality of a fear of death:
Should You Fear Death?
Basically it boils down to one's view on the finality of life.
Should You Fear Death?
Basically it boils down to one's view on the finality of life.
You're no fun at all.
No sir, we at the FBI have no sense of humor of which we are aware.
There's no such thing as "unconditional love" unless one or more parties involved are insane. If I beat you daily, and we still love each other, we're both insane.
That shouldn't have you questioning voids, love, mortality, or death. That should have you focused on determining what kind of love you really want and getting after it.
Not all relationships are fragile. Mine with my wife is not. But we WORK at it. I don't let anyone inside the wall I have around my relationship with my wife. I once made a friend of hers sit with me on the front porch in until my wife got there. This was a dear friend who stood with us at our weddimg. I trust her. She trusts me. We would never cheat on my wife. Why? I wasn't going to be inside my house with another woman alone.....period. I'm sure plenty of you think that is just silly, and "if you trust each other what's the problem". Not so. I have seen countless people get into trouble because they let their guard down in the wrong place at the wrong time.
The point is, you don't need to strive or search for unconditional love because it doesn't exist....and SHOULDN'T exist. There should be conditions....like mutual respect, fidelity, passion, kindness, etc. But what you need to look for is someone willing to WORK at those aspects WITH you and PROTECT the BOUNDARIES around your relationship. By the way, the same has true for relationships with family, friends, and (to a certain extent) even coworkers. The boundaries and aspects that need work are different, but the things that work are the same.
I didn't read the whole thread. Seems like you went through a breakup though. Hope you heal soon and get back out there.
That shouldn't have you questioning voids, love, mortality, or death. That should have you focused on determining what kind of love you really want and getting after it.
Not all relationships are fragile. Mine with my wife is not. But we WORK at it. I don't let anyone inside the wall I have around my relationship with my wife. I once made a friend of hers sit with me on the front porch in until my wife got there. This was a dear friend who stood with us at our weddimg. I trust her. She trusts me. We would never cheat on my wife. Why? I wasn't going to be inside my house with another woman alone.....period. I'm sure plenty of you think that is just silly, and "if you trust each other what's the problem". Not so. I have seen countless people get into trouble because they let their guard down in the wrong place at the wrong time.
The point is, you don't need to strive or search for unconditional love because it doesn't exist....and SHOULDN'T exist. There should be conditions....like mutual respect, fidelity, passion, kindness, etc. But what you need to look for is someone willing to WORK at those aspects WITH you and PROTECT the BOUNDARIES around your relationship. By the way, the same has true for relationships with family, friends, and (to a certain extent) even coworkers. The boundaries and aspects that need work are different, but the things that work are the same.
I didn't read the whole thread. Seems like you went through a breakup though. Hope you heal soon and get back out there.
Your behavior seems rather extreme to me, but I agree completely with you otherwise.
Has it occurred to you that your actions in this instance could look MORE suspicious than if you'd just treated the lady in question in a more.....errrm....normal manner and just invited her into the house?.....
Just saying.....
That's always the trap - be over-cautious like that, and you're likely to be accused of "having something to hide".
There was no break-up, or death (although my friend's mom is still slowly dying from brain cancer).
I have a very mindless job and a may think a bit too much at times.
It just seems like we are all looking for something to make us whole, and perhaps what we're looking for can only be found in death. If I elaborate much more I'll be wandering into religious territory.
I have a very mindless job and a may think a bit too much at times.
It just seems like we are all looking for something to make us whole, and perhaps what we're looking for can only be found in death. If I elaborate much more I'll be wandering into religious territory.
First question from my wife would have been "Why on earth are you two sitting out on the porch?".....
The answer "Because we might have been shagging like rabbits otherwise" Would NOT have gone down well
Sort of interesting. Not extremely interesting. A superficial wave-of-the-arm dismissal of the possibility of an afterlife.
Of course if there is no afterlife then the fear of being dead is irrational. Fear of pain, suffering, and a protracted decline would still be rational, but not a fear of being dead.
I go back to my earlier post; for the most part, fear of being dead is fear of the unknown. This article claims to "know" there is no afterlife, but obviously that cannot be known until you experience death. The unknown is still unknown. Thus the logic of the article to dismiss the fear of death is incomplete.
No. It never did. She knows me so she wasn't surprised. She found it romantic and laughed it off and lamented that more men don't put barriers around their families. We sat on a beautiful porch and enjoyed the breeze. It wasn't torture but it made my point.
I don't flirt with women at shows either.
What's funny is that these days I am seen as the oddball.
Edit to add: Just when you think I'm odd enough.. .
One of the artists a frequently fill in with is a female singer married to one of my best friends. I never ever call her to ask questions about a show. I text or call my buddy (her guitar player and husband) and have him ask her whatever I need to know. She's my buddy's wife. I am not going to call her. He told me once before that is was unnecessary but also pretty awesome.
But, hey, you guys can live however you want. I want to keep my marriage and my friends. So I set up boundaries on the right side of them.
Last edited:
Does he claim to know there's no afterlife? I'll have to re read that. I don't claim that at all, personally. I just withhold belief without evidence. The difference is subtle but important.
To me the beauty of life lies in the very fact that it is finite. If you knew you would live forever you would not be concerned with what the years had in store for you, you would be happy to just allow time to roll on until you became so bored with your existence you'd end it on your own.
We become aware of our mortality the first time someone we know personally passes from this life and we realize they are never coming back. While some accept it for what it is and continue to march into the future with a new awareness of their limited time as a living creature, others begin a quest for ever lasting life. Oddly enough it is those who spend their lives looking for a first class ticket in whatever mystery lies beyond who claim the least fear of death because they feel abiding by certain rules in this life will insure them a better deal when their mortal clock runs down. Most of the rest of mankind just shoulders the wheel of life knowing their time is too precious to be wasted.
In my limited experience, the desire to leave a lasting legacy is something common to many of both those who seek immotality and those who don't. It's why when we become cognizant of the fact we have a cutoff date looming ahead, we begin to plan and work toward something that will allow us to live on after desth, if only in the memories of our fellow tribe members. Those who don't share that desire are content to simply pack as much happiness and love into the time they are allotted before moving on and allowing those who follow them their own opportunity to pack as much happiness and love into whatever time they are given.
Silly i know, but hey, life is far too fleeting to waste too much of it concerned with looking for an infalable answer to a question we've heretofore been unable to answer with anything more than an opinion. While some of those opinions are very complex and some (like mine) are very simple, at the end of the day, or the end of our time as a living creature, they are all nothing more than an opnion we use as the basis for our lives as we approach the certanty of our mortality.
We become aware of our mortality the first time someone we know personally passes from this life and we realize they are never coming back. While some accept it for what it is and continue to march into the future with a new awareness of their limited time as a living creature, others begin a quest for ever lasting life. Oddly enough it is those who spend their lives looking for a first class ticket in whatever mystery lies beyond who claim the least fear of death because they feel abiding by certain rules in this life will insure them a better deal when their mortal clock runs down. Most of the rest of mankind just shoulders the wheel of life knowing their time is too precious to be wasted.
In my limited experience, the desire to leave a lasting legacy is something common to many of both those who seek immotality and those who don't. It's why when we become cognizant of the fact we have a cutoff date looming ahead, we begin to plan and work toward something that will allow us to live on after desth, if only in the memories of our fellow tribe members. Those who don't share that desire are content to simply pack as much happiness and love into the time they are allotted before moving on and allowing those who follow them their own opportunity to pack as much happiness and love into whatever time they are given.
Silly i know, but hey, life is far too fleeting to waste too much of it concerned with looking for an infalable answer to a question we've heretofore been unable to answer with anything more than an opinion. While some of those opinions are very complex and some (like mine) are very simple, at the end of the day, or the end of our time as a living creature, they are all nothing more than an opnion we use as the basis for our lives as we approach the certanty of our mortality.
