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Dumb Craig's List Ads pt.4: Dumber and Dumbest

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From the Urban Dictionary...

Bawse;

1) African-American corruption of "Boss". Can be a noun or adjective.
- The Man; literally the illest sh*t your whacked out mind can comprehend.
- Bawse ~ Chuck Norris > Boss > Beast > Hero > Chief > El Capitan > You
- Ronnie Coleman is bawse because he is huge and takes steroids, giving him gigantic muscles and an incongruously high-pitched voice.

2)Similar to the word 'Awesome' in meaning, this modified variation is used amongst the coolest people on earth.
- Dave is bawse.
- Arrested Development is a bawse TV show

3)Bawse is a word used by real g's.
- BAWSE da most awwwsoome word on eatrh.
- Look at that BAwse the Hawse with his spawse eatin sawse. Hes too g! BAWSE!!!

4)A word to describe an awesome gangster, or something that has been done that shows 'gangsterness'
- Simon Shaw is a Bawse.
 
Watching older TB members landing with a hard splat in the world of youth/urban culture is pretty amusing.

Believe it or not, using that slang, especially in the fledgling hip-hop industry, is actually a form of professionalism. Ain't nobody hood enough gone take you seriously spitting all proper like.
 
Watching older TB members landing with a hard splat in the world of youth/urban culture is pretty amusing.

Believe it or not, using that slang, especially in the fledgling hip-hop industry, is actually a form of professionalism. Ain't nobody hood enough gone take you seriously spitting all proper like.

Yeah, I'm sure Jay Z's financial planners, legal team, and head's of his corporations use that jibberish.

"In the news today, Jay Z's legal team of Carroll, Guido & Groffman, LLP responded to allegations of misconduct by their client with, "Yo, bawse, that sh&t is whack. These haters be trippin'. Jay Z is straight up, dope.""

Maybe I'm wrong...:hiding:
 
Yeah, I'm sure Jay Z's financial planners, legal team, and head's of his corporations use that jibberish.

"In the news today, Jay Z's legal team of Carroll, Guido & Groffman, LLP responded to allegations of misconduct by their client with, "Yo, bawse, that sh&t is whack. These haters be trippin'. Jay Z is straight up, dope.""

Maybe I'm wrong...:hiding:

Oh no, you're right, but note the word "fledgling" in my response. This dude is "tryna" connect with the low-level, local/startup type guys, who don't have legal teams, just themselves and their friends. IME, these guys (as with most original musicians imo) consider themselves to be "real" and are much more likely to take someone seriously who speaks their language. This is even more the case with hip-hop, IME, because slang/ebonics are so heavily ingrained in the culture and image.

Then again, I'm crazily extrapolating from a small craigslist post hundreds of miles away by someone I don't know, so FWIW. ;)
 
You'll notice, he doesn't say what he studied under Paul McCartney, nor which Paul McCartney. Perhaps he lived in a flat a floor below that of Paul McCartney when they were children, and thus did his studying under Paul McCartney. This doesn't make the ad writer a lier, per se, only willfully deceptive. Oh, wait, that's lying...

Maybe he just had a poster of Sir Paul taped to his ceiling and stood under that while he studied.
 
To quote exactly

"-Ibanez Attack ATK3EX Bass Guitar! *very lightly used*

-Acoustic brand B20 1x12 bass combo amp! *works like new*

-Roadster bass gig bag! *fits bass perfect*

All of this for a value of over $700.00

**OFFERING ALL OF THIS FOR JUST $350.00** (O.B.O.) SERIOUS OFFERS ONLY PLEASE!!

Also looking for trade: Xbox 360 Elite, w/ controller, harddrive & skyrim"

:rollno:
 
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I am looking to buy several guitars. I am mainly interested in buying USA gibbons, fenders, jacksons, charvels, taylors, martins, guild, prs, tom anderson, parker, musician, suhr, esp, james tyler, gretsch, warriors, etc. I am also interested in others guitars and amps as well. Im really looking for a music man jpx-7 bfr with a quilted maple top, and piezo. Please if you can send pictures of your guitar and what you would sell it for. No phone number in your email = no response. I am a serious buyer and i pay fair prices and i am very reliable. I will probably be able to pick up depending on my schedule and your location.

Location: Jacksonville, FL

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Your listing says you are looking to buy USA Gibbons. There are some Gibbons at the zoo but they are not from the USA. I believe most of them are from Borneo and I don't think they are for sale. I would also check whether you require a special permit to buy and sell Gibbons.

Location: ?????

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I've got a Gorilla amp I'll sell you as long as you promise to take good care of him. His name is Stanley and he doesn't need a license.

Location: The Zoo
 
Friend just texted me. I laughed my ass off. Sorry if it's been posted. Didn't search to see if it's here.

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PRO Bassist Available (Jackson)
Date: 2012-02-04, 7:43PM EST
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]
Bass player available for PAYING GIGS ONLY. I play G, C, D. If your songs are not in G, please transpose them into G. If your song has an Em or Bm or anything off the wall I will probably sit out that chord. Or I could learn those notes for $30 each. If you want me to do fancy stuff like go back and forth between G and D while you hold a G chord, forget it because I'm a "pocket" player. Minimum $100 per gig within a 5 mile radius of 39202. $5 per mile travel charge for other areas out of town. Please make sure your gigs are on a JATRAN bus route, or you can pick me up at my place. Must be home by 11pm due to previous legal hassles. No gigs within 500 yards of schools, parks, or playgrounds.

Location: Jackson
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



PostingID: 2835203944
 
Friend just texted me. I laughed my ass off. Sorry if it's been posted. Didn't search to see if it's here.

[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]

PRO Bassist Available (Jackson)
Date: 2012-02-04, 7:43PM EST
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]
Bass player available for PAYING GIGS ONLY. I play G, C, D. If your songs are not in G, please transpose them into G. If your song has an Em or Bm or anything off the wall I will probably sit out that chord. Or I could learn those notes for $30 each. If you want me to do fancy stuff like go back and forth between G and D while you hold a G chord, forget it because I'm a "pocket" player. Minimum $100 per gig within a 5 mile radius of 39202. $5 per mile travel charge for other areas out of town. Please make sure your gigs are on a JATRAN bus route, or you can pick me up at my place. Must be home by 11pm due to previous legal hassles. No gigs within 500 yards of schools, parks, or playgrounds.

Location: Jackson
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



PostingID: 2835203944

That's got to be a joke... right?
 
Not music related, but since I am looking for my next hot rod project. I found this CL ad interesting:

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Chevy C10 with 350 tbi motor and TH350 trans
Np205 Transfer case
10 bolt 3/4 ton front axle
14 bolt rear axle
4:10 gears
10" Super springs lift
2 1/2 ton Driveshaft
3" Hooker headers with flowmaster 40's
44 inch ground hawgs tires
Fresh oil. radiator, and diff fluid change on 10/15

I LOVE MEN!!!!!!
I LOVE P*&!5

New Starter and alternator as of 12/3
Trades other trucks, bikes, cars. Offer up.
 
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