Farting during a show

[SBassman]

You guys rock.

While my sons and I nuke each other on a regular basis, I have never had the courage to nuke my bandmates. I'm not sure how they'd take it.

You guys are my heroes.

 

[blankstare77]

Apparently I fart frequently in my sleep.


Hell, sometimes they smell so bad I wake myself up.

 

[haloonpc]

..... I only fart when I eat stuff full of sugar (Isn't that the 'cause lol) Like when I eat Burger King. But I don't think I've farted during a gig.

 

[Goannaman]

I have two good fart stories.

Once, quite a while ago, myself and five friends decided to go to Wet and Wild (a water park, not a strip club). So we all piled in my friends Altima for the 30 mile trip. There were four of us jammed in the back seat. I was against the door, my friend Nate jammed right against me. I couldn't help it and had to rip a pretty stinky one. I'll never forget my friend saying: "Ewww I could feel the heat of your fart on my leg!"

The more recent one was at work a few months back. A co-worker asked me what I would do in a certain situation. So, I looked at him, and with a straight face I said: "Well Don, what I like to do is stand by a co-workers desk, pretend to listen to their problem, then fart and walk away. So I'm going to go ahead and leave now." His cube smelled for a good five minutes.

 

[MakiSupaStar]

The more recent one was at work a few months back. A co-worker asked me what I would do in a certain situation. So, I looked at him, and with a straight face I said: "Well Don, what I like to do is stand by a co-workers desk, pretend to listen to their problem, then fart and walk away. So I'm going to go ahead and leave now." His cube smelled for a good five minutes.

That's a great story.... LMAO.

 

[Gard]

I have two good fart stories.

Once, quite a while ago, myself and five friends decided to go to Wet and Wild (a water park, not a strip club). So we all piled in my friends Altima for the 30 mile trip. There were four of us jammed in the back seat. I was against the door, my friend Nate jammed right against me. I couldn't help it and had to rip a pretty stinky one. I'll never forget my friend saying: "Ewww I could feel the heat of your fart on my leg!"

The more recent one was at work a few months back. A co-worker asked me what I would do in a certain situation. So, I looked at him, and with a straight face I said: "Well Don, what I like to do is stand by a co-workers desk, pretend to listen to their problem, then fart and walk away. So I'm going to go ahead and leave now." His cube smelled for a good five minutes.

Truly genius.

I lived there in Clermont for many years, on East Av. My father & grandmother live just east of there off SR 50 on John's Lake, and I get down there from time to time to visit.

I will make sure not to let you visit my cubicle while I'm there.

 

[Goannaman]

Truly genius.

I lived there in Clermont for many years, on East Av. My father & grandmother live just east of there off SR 50 on John's Lake, and I get down there from time to time to visit.

I will make sure not to let you visit my cubicle while I'm there.

Cool. I actually live in Minneola just off 27. When I was little my Mom lived in an apartment in downtown Clermont right on 8th st.

 

[Gard]

Cool. I actually live in Minneola just off 27. When I was little my Mom lived in an apartment in downtown Clermont right on 8th st.

I bet we know a lot of the same people!

Were you around when Donny Ray's Guitars was open on Montrose St.? I actually managed the place for a good while, until he decided to close up.

 

[Jeff Martinez]

The more recent one was at work a few months back. A co-worker asked me what I would do in a certain situation. So, I looked at him, and with a straight face I said: "Well Don, what I like to do is stand by a co-workers desk, pretend to listen to their problem, then fart and walk away. So I'm going to go ahead and leave now." His cube smelled for a good five minutes.

That's awesome!!!

 

[Goannaman]

I bet we know a lot of the same people!

Were you around when Donny Ray's Guitars was open on Montrose St.? I actually managed the place for a good while, until he decided to close up.

Probably not. Growing up I mainly lived w/ my dad up in Sanford. I have only been living out here since 2002.

 

[Gard]

Probably not. Growing up I mainly lived w/ my dad up in Sanford. I have only been living out here since 2002.

Ah, OK, well, in '02 I was living in Orlando already. I was at John's Lake in late '00/early '01, didn't leave CenFla until May '05.

Donny Ray's "morphed" into that shop that's on the corner of Montrose & 5th (?). He reopened a couple years after I left, then sold out to the guy that was the teacher there.

I'll probably be down that way around March for a little while, need to visit the fam-buh-lee soon.

...we now return you to your reg-you-lur-lee sked-juhl-edd pro-gram-ming...

 

[MakiSupaStar]

I just farted and it smelled. BAD... So bad I checked myself, and realized I put my underwear on backwards (no kidding ). I think the smell was unhindered and escaped out of the pee slot.

 

[srxplayer]

The more recent one was at work a few months back. A co-worker asked me what I would do in a certain situation. So, I looked at him, and with a straight face I said: "Well Don, what I like to do is stand by a co-workers desk, pretend to listen to their problem, then fart and walk away. So I'm going to go ahead and leave now." His cube smelled for a good five minutes.

LMAO

 

[Mickey Shane]

I have a tendancy to cut loose some cheese right after a show, when we are packing up our gear. One evening after a show we were about finished moving our gear and the guitarist was saying something about how much money we raked in. I was feeling quite relaxed and blasted an Ab note for about 10 seconds straight. The guitarist was 15 feet away from me. He stopped talking mid sentence and exclaimed: "man, that was a big one"! Soon the air circulated to his area and he said "And it stinks too"!

I was quite proud of that one.

 

[SBassman]

I have a tendancy to cut loose some cheese right after a show, when we are packing up our gear. One evening after a show we were about finished moving our gear and the guitarist was saying something about how much money we raked in. I was feeling quite relaxed and blasted an Ab note for about 10 seconds straight. The guitarist was 15 feet away from me. He stopped talking mid sentence and exclaimed: "man, that was a big one"! Soon the air circulated to his area and he said "And it stinks too"!

I was quite proud of that one.

As you should have been.

 

[The_D]

The more recent one was at work a few months back. A co-worker asked me what I would do in a certain situation. So, I looked at him, and with a straight face I said: "Well Don, what I like to do is stand by a co-workers desk, pretend to listen to their problem, then fart and walk away. So I'm going to go ahead and leave now." His cube smelled for a good five minutes.

I dont know why but whenever I read that I think of the Boss from Office Space!

 

[jive1]

OK, I snuck one out at church on Saturday. I thought it wasn't gonna stink, but it did. I can usually tell if I'm gonna let out a stinker because my arse gets warm before firing. This one was a stealth stinker. Didn't have the usual rotten egg or vegetable smell, it was more like the cross between burnt rubber and frozen dog poop.

I was in between the keyboard player and drummer. I was careful not to look at either one, because if I did, I would have busted out laughing and would have been caught. Luckily I was behind the vocalists, or my wife would have probably seen the smirk on my face and busted me.

Sometimes it's funny to cut one when you are with others who are not likely to call you on it. The other musicians were so polite and kind that they wouldn't be the type to make a fuss about something like that, let alone call out the offender on it. It just makes the whole situation funnier. I was dying of laughter on the inside, but I used every last inch of my ability not used for playing bass to keep a straight face and not lose it during the service.

And yes, I was thinking of this thread when it happened.

 

[bassman314]

haha Jive..

I love that feeling... The 'Spirit' really moves me sometimes

 

[MakiSupaStar]

I dont know why but whenever I read that I think of the Boss from Office Space!

Ummmmm.... I'm going to need you to come in and file those TPS reports on Sunday.... ummmmm-kay? LOL.

I don't know... I was thinking the guy from TV show The Office (US Version) might work better. He's a bit less prozac-influenced. But definitely likely to drop a bomb and walk away.

Either way, the story keeps "giving".

 

[SBassman]

OK, I snuck one out at church on Saturday. I thought it wasn't gonna stink, but it did. I can usually tell if I'm gonna let out a stinker because my arse gets warm before firing. This one was a stealth stinker. Didn't have the usual rotten egg or vegetable smell, it was more like the cross between burnt rubber and frozen dog poop.

I was in between the keyboard player and drummer. I was careful not to look at either one, because if I did, I would have busted out laughing and would have been caught. Luckily I was behind the vocalists, or my wife would have probably seen the smirk on my face and busted me.

Sometimes it's funny to cut one when you are with others who are not likely to call you on it. The other musicians were so polite and kind that they wouldn't be the type to make a fuss about something like that, let alone call out the offender on it. It just makes the whole situation funnier. I was dying of laughter on the inside, but I used every last inch of my ability not used for playing bass to keep a straight face and not lose it during the service.

And yes, I was thinking of this thread when it happened.

Another classic post emerges - from the Godfather of the thread.