Get off my LAWN! "Grumpy Old Farts"

[SoulReflection]

Our son, who is an excellent chef, is visiting us for the holidays. One of the things he wanted to see was a white Christmas. He got his wish along with some bone chilling temps.

Today he said he would take care of all of the snacks so the family could watch the Bengals game. Beforehand, he needed to go to the local grocery store since he wanted to make homemade buffalo dip, spicy and non-spicy wings, and his own version of stuffed poppers. His father (i.e., me) drove him to the store and we went in together. One of the things he needed was a type of spice. While we were looking for the right spice, his idiot father did this and took a picture of it:

View attachment 4104997

I feel sorry for the kid. To have a father like that.......


Lastly, the snacks were unbelievably great!

So, how was Scarborough Fair?

 

[Jeff Scott]

Helter Skelter. I’ve got blisters on me fingers!

Do you have a Whole Lotta dem?

 

[beans-on-toast]

Do you have a Whole Lotta dem?

 

[Deleted member 268085]

If we're going to be melting cheese, better make it fondue.

An SNL favorite from years past:

Saturday Night Live Transcripts
Season 1: Episode 19
75s: Madeline Kahn / Carly Simon

Namibia Fondue Sets

Mark Mbutu…Garrett Morris

[Open on black man dressed in African clothing. He speaks in a slow, hesitant manner]
Mark Mbutu: Hello. I’m Mark Mbutu from the newly emerging African nation of Namibia, a former German colony located in southwest Africa. Namibia is an undeveloped nation, and we are appealing to you as world citizens. We need your fondue sets. Many people in the United States received these fondue sets as gifts for anniversaries, birthdays and housewarmings, and often put them up on a shelf and forget about them. There are thousands of Namibian housewives who could cheer up an otherwise dull dinner party with one of these sets. Oh, please think, please give, please send. We already have enough of the little sterna cans for underneath the sets from when the Germans were here, so only send the fondue pots themselves, and the long fark–forks if you have them. [Dissolve to address on green background] Our address is: Fondue Sets For Namibia, Box 180, Namibia, West Africa. [Dissolve back to Mbutu] Oh, and we would like to thank Mr. and Mrs. Norman Prager for sending us the Water-Pik and the deluxe toaster oven. [Raises fist] Thank you!

[ dissolve to audience shot, zoom in on woman with SUPER: “WEARING UNDERWEAR MARKED THURSDAY” ]

 

[GwenOnBass]

Young and healthy enough to pour a Christmas ale to close the holiday weekend. Monday morning's evidence points to old enough and sleepy enough not to have finished the Christmas ale.

 

[bobyoung53]

Here's my cat Gata showing her two paw tapping technique before her big gig tonight:

 

[bobyoung53]

Here is Gata demonstrating her newly acquired tail slide technique.

 

[SoulReflection]

Here is Gata demonstrating her newly acquired tail slide technique.


View attachment 4105579

I would like to show you my wife's cat swimming in the Koi pond but my wife won't let me throw her in .

 

[bobyoung53]

I would like to show you my wife's cat swimming in the Koi pond but my wife won't let me throw her in .

Gata prefers to show off her bass chops over swimming.

 

[Deleted member 268085]

I would like to show you my wife's cat swimming in the Koi pond but my wife won't let me throw her in .

Feels like splitting a pair of aces in Vegas, one bet on the beating you're gonna take from your wife, and the other on the beating you're gonna take from your cat. And maybe a third on the stink-eye you're gonna get from your koi.

 

[GwenOnBass]

Here is Gata demonstrating her newly acquired tail slide technique.


View attachment 4105579

That's one fancy fret wrap! She does paw muting too?

 

[bobyoung53]

That's one fancy fret wrap! She does paw muting too?

She does it all. You should see her 4 paw tapping technique!

 

[mikeoso]

Dogs have owners.......
Cats have staff.

Parrots have peones.

 

[beans-on-toast]

Here's my cat Gata showing her two paw tapping technique before her big gig tonight:



View attachment 4105566

You called your cat, cat. My uncle called his cat puss. Not far off.

 

[GwenOnBass]

Unable to recall my (dearly departed) Jewish Princess cat ever responded to the name I called her by. But she came immediately when I showed her the brush.

 

[beans-on-toast]

Unable to recall my (dearly departed) Jewish Princess cat ever responded to the name I called her by. But she came immediately when I showed her the brush.

So cats respond to the threat of corporal punishment.

 

[shadowtippy]

Unable to recall my (dearly departed) Jewish Princess cat ever responded to the name I called her by. But she came immediately when I showed her the brush.

Your cat had her priorities in order.

 

[GwenOnBass]

So cats respond to the threat of corporal punishment.

Goodness, she wasn't English

 

[Jeff Scott]

Unable to recall my (dearly departed) Jewish Princess cat ever responded to the name I called her by. But she came immediately when I showed her the brush.

Sorry no hairbrushes available, will this do?

 

[GwenOnBass]

Run for me, not from me hahahaha