• TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
    Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
    Join free Log in
    Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.

How to pick up the ladies...

#42
Best advice I have ever seen given, it is written for males to pick up females, but I suppose that it could work for women trying to obtain other women. Not everything in the article is exactly politically correct or women friendly (although it is still good in my opinion). You can pick or choose what seems right to you. Good luck.

Link Removed
 
#43
MakiSupaStar said:
You need a wingman. A dude to take the sexy Asian chicks off your hands, so you can focus on the lady-liking ladies. You also need a wingman to film such escapades.
Click to expand...

Ah! you are so right! I used to have a damn fine wing-woman, and it worked wonders. I'll work on this. Good advice, indeed.

Funky Ghost said:
Just be you. If they are into you, you'll know it. Unless you're blind to normal social advances ( ahem, like me ) then it might take awhile :) Don't try too hard, it's the surest way to spending nights alone.
Click to expand...

This too, is good advice.. however, I'm socially awkward and blunt. I've found that most ladies like the "smooth, cutsie" types, and I don't think that's really me... or is it? Wait.. I dunno.. but yeah, I'm always me. I wouldn't change for the world. ^_^


Everyone else, thanks for all of the advice. I shall be implementing these ideas, today. I'll let you guys now how things go. ;)
 
#45
Joe Nerve said:
Had to check your profile because I was confused by your name and your post. My first suggestion would be to get into different music. :)

2nd would be to move to park slope brooklyn.

That's all.
Click to expand...

Haha! Well, Edward Wong-Hau Pepelu Tivrusky VI, is a character from an anime called "Cowboy Bebop", and she is a lady as well.
And as far as music goes, I listen to the best there is. :spit:
:D
 
#46
Being in sales, I've never lacked the ability to begin a conversation with complete strangers. In a mentoring program I "highly suggested" that a few of the students I deemed shy take a local community college Public Speaking class which was only a few hundred dollars.

I heard this comment from a handful of them that were self proclaimed socially awkward: "I don't know if it's helping my career, but it's so much easier to approach women now." (All guys in the class)

Personal growth and a boost of self confidence can't hurt.
 
#47
6jase5 said:
Being in sales, I've never lacked the ability to begin a conversation with complete strangers. In a mentoring program I "highly suggested" that a few of the students I deemed shy take a local community college Public Speaking class which was only a few hundred dollars.

I heard this comment from a handful of them that were self proclaimed socially awkward: "I don't know if it's helping my career, but it's so much easier to approach women now." (All guys in the class)

Personal growth and a boost of self confidence can't hurt.
Click to expand...

Now, just because I'm socially awkward doesn't mean I'm shy. I'm pretty much the most straight-forward, talkative, not-shy person around. Also, back in the day.. say when I was 16-18, I used to go out and come back with a hot girl on each arm. I DID work in sales then, so I think you may be on to something there. Hmm. I've been working in factories for about 5 years now, so perhaps that's not helping. I don't think playing the bass is helping, either. Haha. Well, I'll be off to the bar tonight, but I have yet to see many ladies in the bars I go to because none of the nice bars have dartboards... or Guinness.

I'm thinking I'm gonna hang out at GC a lot and try to find the pretty lady who works there. :D
 
#48
"I'm pretty much the most straight-forward, talkative, not-shy person around."

It's not about what you say, it's about how you listen and respond. Not being shy isn't the same as being in tune with your audience.

Sales, performing on stage and dating are the same and in some respects even poker. If you know how to read people, they always tell you what they need and what they are thinking. I've never prescribed to the universally accepted truth that women are hard to read and men are easy (to read). Not really.
 
#50
6jase5 said:
"I'm pretty much the most straight-forward, talkative, not-shy person around."

It's not about what you say, it's about how you listen and respond. Not being shy isn't the same as being in tune with your audience.

Sales, performing on stage and dating are the same and in some respects even poker. If you know how to read people, they always tell you what they need and what they are thinking. I've never prescribed to the universally accepted truth that women are hard to read and men are easy (to read). Not really.
Click to expand...

I couldn't agree more! I think that most people attempt to hide their true feelings about things. I can usually read people like a book, but I dunno.. I've suppose I'll have to meditate more and work on my focus some more. I love reading people though, and just listening and figuring out who they are. It's pretty much my favorite thing to do. I think it's more just a matter of the initial conversation starter. In my younger days I had a girlfriend-type person sorta.. eh..who would go out with me, and we would just hold hands and walk around places we liked to go like downtown or at the mall and girls would just come up to us. From then on, it was easy... so easy. Man I wish I hadn't taken them years for granted. :D
That's her on the left, and me in the middle. And see! My hair looks good short. :spit:
l.jpg
^_^
 
#51
There's no magic bullet when it comes to "what to say." And don't just go up and introduce yourself, it makes it obvious what you're doing. First thing is you have to get over yourself, and your fear of rejection. You're not going to be rejected of anything, if you're not asking the girl for anything, right? So go talk to girls without the mindset you're "picking them up!" Picking up is lame..you need to talk to girls to find out who is worth YOUR time, not the other way around.

Ask a question or talk about something situational. Even if it's stupid. I met a girl once by going up and saying, "hey need your opinion. Turkey or Brazil?" Then said I was going on vacation in a couple months, where should I go? The conversation quickly changed from there. It can be anything, really.

It's not really what you say, but how you say it. You've gotta be confident and sure of yourself. And when you approach a girl, always say "hey, I only have a second, but...." that way you're automatically not going to be the clingy guy. That being said, know when to walk away.

There's been some other links posted up, but one thing I read over 10 years ago that seriously was a game changer was "Attraction Isn't a Choice" by David Deangelo. It opened my eyes to why some of my friends were so good at getting girls and I wasn't(at the time).
 
#53
My girlfriend was with a girl for a while (before we got together. Funny story, too.). Her circle of gay friends' secret was to just find the lesbian hotspots. Her then girlfriend was also butcher than most men, that may have helped. But it was the fact that they 'prowled' the hotspots for some lovin'.

Of course, I'm useless when it comes to picking up women. Hell, I don't even know how I got my girlfriend to like me. Four years later and I'm still trying to figure that out.
 
#56
In my humble opinion, you look quite hot in the picture. Alas, I am a man, and an old one at that.

Aside from the "Does this rag smell like choral hydrate to you?", the best line I know is "Hi." Say hi.

Another clever trick is to just be honest and real. Talk about whatever, and if the conversation touches on relationships, you might mention that you don't have a girlfriend right now and if they smile, even a little bit, add that you haven't had one in quite a while.

Then again, as someone said, the population you are trying to draw from is very very small. My lesbian friends seem to just be able to tell whether a stranger is lesbian or not. And many of their friends are lesbian. So....there is a community out there. Go hang out where they hang out. And use the "hi" line. Tell them their necklace looks nice. Look them in the eye.
 
#58
Good points, guys. I will attempt to not have the "picking up" mindset, and I will definitely hang out at dog parks.. but the only issue with that is that because I used to do dog training, I run the risk of running into people who I have a professional relationship with. Regardless, I will go though. Hopefully, things turn out good. I'm certainly not 'hurting' for some lady lovin', but it would just be nice.
I suppose I could still hit up my old contacts, too...
Hmm... yes.... ;)
 
#59
Radical Edward said:
Good points, guys. I will attempt to not have the "picking up" mindset, and I will definitely hang out at dog parks.. but the only issue with that is that because I used to do dog training, I run the risk of running into people who I have a professional relationship with. Regardless, I will go though. Hopefully, things turn out good. I'm certainly not 'hurting' for some lady lovin', but it would just be nice.
I suppose I could still hit up my old contacts, too...
Hmm... yes.... ;)
Click to expand...

Nothing wrong with a Game Changer ;)

Peace,
Greg
 

Latest posts

Top Bottom
Back