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Im so lonely

#81
Hey Sam, I hopped over here from the Chick vs Chick w/ bass thread. Are things going any better for you yet?

I understand what it's like to feel that bad, and I've been in an awful funk since about June when I graduated from high school. I never was popular there and now I've only got a single friend, and no band because the two of us can't find a drummer. My one and only friend is pushing me away a little bit and I worry he'll find better people and better musicians and I'll be thrown out to the curb.

I'm on TB quite frequently because there's nothing else to do and It's the closest I can get to talking to people. When I am around people, I feel like they don't see the world how I do, and I feel like I'm separated from almost everyone by a thick Plexiglas barrier. Loneliness pervades every moment of my life, and the more people who are around, the lonelier I often feel. When I have classes, I can go through the entire day without once opening my mouth to speak. Yet, I want the company and need someone to talk to also.

But, things will get better, for you and me both.

Take it as a sign that your band broke up, and start looking for the next opportunity. There's always room for bassists, and especially good ones. ;) Things never stay bad, and they're almost never as bad as they could be. Try and think of the things that are going well and put your faith into them.

Everything is going to be okay.

Good luck with everything. :)
Oh BTW you can PM me if you want someone to talk to. We're both named Sam, we're roughly the same age, and we both play bass! What better company is there than that? ;)
 
#82
You guys are amazing. I'm feeling way better...more confident. I'm gonna make some videos..hit up craigslist.

This is a sign. I'm supposed to so something else, find new people, better musicians, make more money so me and Erica can move out, become an even better bassist, and work on myself
 
#83
Sorry to hear about the band bust-up, Sam. It sucks, but it'll suck less every day. If this stuff was easy, everyone would be doing it, so feel it for a day or two. Buy (or make) a cake and have a pity party for a few hours. When the party's over, move on. Put up your own ads and find people to play with who appreciate you for your talents and who push you to be better. It won't be long before you're seeing the fruits of your labor.
 
#84
Samthebassist said:
You guys are amazing. I'm feeling way better...more confident. I'm gonna make some videos..hit up craigslist.

This is a sign. I'm supposed to so something else, find new people, better musicians, make more money so me and Erica can move out, become an even better bassist, and work on myself
Click to expand...

Good plan :-)
 
#85
Samthebassist said:
You guys are amazing. I'm feeling way better...more confident. I'm gonna make some videos..hit up craigslist.

This is a sign. I'm supposed to so something else, find new people, better musicians, make more money so me and Erica can move out, become an even better bassist, and work on myself
Click to expand...

borat_thumbs_up.jpg
 
#89
I'll take it. :D

(even though "lovable" is not an adjective usually used to describe me)

And I love you too, in a "daughter I never had, so therefore didn't eat me out of house and home" platonic way. ;)
 
#90
An old cowboy sat down at the bar and ordered a drink. As he sat sipping his drink, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"
He replied, "Well, I've spent my whole life, breaking colts, working cows, going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my barn, fixing flats, working on tractors, and feeding my dogs, so I guess I am a cowboy."

She said, "I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women. When I shower, I think about women. When I watch TV, I think about women. I even think about women when I eat. It seems that everything makes me think of women."

The two sat sipping in silence.

A little while later, a man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"

He replied, "I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian
 
#92
THand said:
An old cowboy sat down at the bar and ordered a drink. As he sat sipping his drink, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"
He replied, "Well, I've spent my whole life, breaking colts, working cows, going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my barn, fixing flats, working on tractors, and feeding my dogs, so I guess I am a cowboy."

She said, "I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women. When I shower, I think about women. When I watch TV, I think about women. I even think about women when I eat. It seems that everything makes me think of women."

The two sat sipping in silence.

A little while later, a man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"

He replied, "I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian
Click to expand...



Consider this joke stolen.


:D
 
#93
Don't take this to heart. It's a joke
"God.. "I'm just not happy. I'm just not happy. I'm just not happy because my life didn't turn out the way I thought it would." Hey! Join the ******* club, ok!? I thought I was going to be the starting center fielder for the Boston Red Socks. Life sucks, get a ****** helmet, allright?! "I'm not happy. I'm not happy." Nobody's happy, ok!? Happiness comes in small doses folks. It's a cigarette, or a chocolate cookie, or a five second orgasm. That's it, ok! You ***, you eat the cookie, you smoke the butt, you go to sleep, you get up in the morning and go to ****** work, ok!? That is it! End of ****** list! "I'm just not happy." Shut the **** up, allright? That's the name of my new book, "Shut the **** Up, by Doctor Denis Leary. A revolutionary new form of therapy." I'm gonna have my patients come in. "Doctor, I.." "Shut the **** up, next!" "I don't feel so.." "Shut the **** up, next!" "He made me feel so much better about myself, you know? He just told me to shut the **** up and nobody had ever told me that before. I feel so much better now." ;)
 
#94
Chef FourString said:
Sounds like you need to get a good dog, man. Companionship doesn't come in a better package than a dog.
Click to expand...

Here here. Just getting started on this thread, but I completely concur. I'll take my main pooch over most people any day of the week. People like to throw the term "unconditional love" around a lot, but dogs really give it.

Of course, I'm not saying you should necessarily get a dog. I don't know your living situation and you need the means to take care of them properly, etc.

Just saying I love dogs, I guess!
 
#95
Alright, had to get the dog thing in there, but now I'm up to speed.

Lots of good advice here (as usual on TB). Many people agreed with you on exercising as a way to make you feel better. Not only does it raise your metabolism (helping with weight loss), keep you healthy, and give you time to think, but it's also a natural mood enhancer. The chemicals released during exercise (endorphins, I believe) naturally boost your mood.

Speaking of chemicals, if you have a history of feeling down frequently, mood swings, etc, or you notice that your moods are more severe now than in the past, perhaps a visit to the doctor is in order. We all know far to little about you to say anything with any certainty, but hopefully we can agree that people can have medical conditions, chemical imbalances, etc. that affect their emotions. Not sure on your insurance situation, but keep it in mind.

And everyone is right on the band. Bands break up all the time and it usually sucks. Paul Stanley from Kiss once said something to the effect of "Marriages with two people don't work half the time, so what chance does a marriage of four or five have?" I've lost count of how many bands I've been in now and I've still got decades of playing left to do (hopefully). I think it feels worse for you now because you're dealing with it for the first time. The first band always feels special and sort of "meant to be." But after you've been in a few more, you'll gain perspective. You may find out that guitarist was even more egotistical than you thought. You might decide the drummer wasn't as great as you thought. As you play with more people, your view of this last band will change.

And please don't think for a second that you won't find another band. We've all heard you play and you're very, very good and very passionate about music. You will find a new opportunity. Just let it happen.

Sam, you seem like a great girl and I will echo what everyone else says--you have unlimited potential. Keep your chin up and don't let it get you down. All the things we go through in this life make us who we are and make us special and unique. Even crappy experiences are still valuable experiences. Which leads me to my favorite quote:

Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want. --Randy Pausch
 
#96
Schizoid75 said:
Here here. Just getting started on this thread, but I completely concur. I'll take my main pooch over most people any day of the week. People like to throw the term "unconditional love" around a lot, but dogs really give it.

Of course, I'm not saying you should necessarily get a dog. I don't know your living situation and you need the means to take care of them properly, etc.

Just saying I love dogs, I guess!
Click to expand...

If you ever wonder if your wife or your dog loves you more, lock them both in the trunk of your car.

In an hour, open the trunk and see which one is glad to see you.:D
 

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