Just found out singer has other band

[jmattbassplaya]

Rough day in TB:BM lol.

 

[bluewine]

i have one question. and then depending on the answer i will have advice.

how old are you and the other members of the band?

I love that question. I wish every would publish that detail prior to asking for advice.

The comment or advice I would give to a high schooler is going to be different than what I would give a 30 or 40 year old.

 

[Icey101]

listen to me....

women do this to you, the fact she is readng lyrics means she aint that crash hot, guys can lose their heads over a female vox and get jealous, if it was a guy would you think the same?

ok heres the trick, start taking some vids on your practice and and gigs with her....start your band youtube sight or make your own, then use these vids to advertise for your own band with a female vox, become a leader not a follower...

then go and kick some butt

 

[bassguppy]

I was in a band about 25 years ago that was insanely jealous if anyone strayed and jammed with friends or did a gig with another band. This band was one of my firsts so I put up with it but I eventually left. It was like you had an affair, nevermind that we gigged maybe 4-5 times a year.

Nowadays, I need a reason to stick around. As horrible as it sounds if a band ain't getting the gigs I will only put up with that for so long. I'm actually in only 1 band at the moment but I have been in multiple bands and have done sub work. Having no strings attached is nice sometimes.

As for blowing off rehearsal for the other band I would have been up front about it "I'm in this other band and we got a gig". It depends on how her outlook, is it a hobby or a business.

Me? $$ trumps hangin with the guys most of the time.

she reads lyrics on stage?
and you are not upset about THAT?

There is nothing easy about learning the words to 100+ cover tunes. I'm sure there are a number of bassists on this board who routinely use charts or sightread.

 

[artdrtr]

I'm 40 and she's late 20's. Other guys in band are 38 and 43

I know, she's young or we're old...

Her theatre/promoter friend said he could get her a set for a multiple bill night and was looking for an all-girl band. She didn't even offer the current band, rather puts the girl band together using 3/4 of our songs we brought to her and spent time/money practicing

If it were me, I'd have push for the current band, not some "Runaways"-thing that turned out to be 2 guitar guys, female singer/bass/drums -- using half our current band and most of our songs.

I have no problem with sub'ing, I do it. My problem is we are trying to get going again after losing our singer, and I've been hesitant to book gigs until I thought she was up to speed... apparently I was wrong. And the only one looking to promote our band.

 

[jive1]

As for blowing off rehearsal for the other band I would have been up front about it "I'm in this other band and we got a gig". It depends on how her outlook, is it a hobby or a business.

Me? $$ trumps hangin with the guys most of the time.

Personally, I like playing with guys who are in other bands. Less pressure on me to fill their gig schedule, more opportunities for networking and gigs.

I've had guys cancel rehearsal on me because they had a paid gig come up. My response? "Go earn some cash, and we'll catch you next time".

There is nothing easy about learning the words to 100+ cover tunes. I'm sure there are a number of bassists on this board who routinely use charts or sightread.

Back when I only knew 40 songs, I never needed a chart or lyrics. Since then, I've probably have played over 800 different tunes, and there's no way I can remember them all or not confuse some changes of one tune with another. I'm sure I could probably figure play 80% of 100s of songs off the top of my head, but I like to make sure I have all the changes, and a chart comes in handy.

 

[Warfender]

Don't fret it. I'm in two full time and sometimes a third. You can learn things workung in different bands. Just find out if it is another band is permanent or they were just goofing around so you can coordinate gigs, rehersal, etc.

 

[jive1]

The fact that she plays in another band isn't the issue. It's how she's handling it.

I'd have a talk with her. Just start fresh, and ask her bluntly where your band fits with her priorities related to the other band. If she says that the other band is a priority, then it's your prerogative to replace her. If she says your band is the priority, but not acting like it, it's your prerogative to replace her.

 

[4001]

Gotta understand one thing...LOTS of musician types are FLAKES, gig whores and only care about themselves. It's the truth and it's why musicians should never quit their day jobs.

 

[jmattbassplaya]

The fact that she plays in another band isn't the issue. It's how she's handling it.

I'd have a talk with her. Just start fresh, and ask her bluntly where your band fits with her priorities related to the other band. If she says that the other band is a priority, then it's your prerogative to replace her. If she says your band is the priority, but not acting like it, it's your prerogative to replace her.

Yep.

 

[A-Step-Towards]

Well I mean your other band members are prracticing with her correct? so practicing when she is skipping? that means you need to talk with them to not just her, I mean to me it sounds like they just formed a new band without you , they dont practice with you , they play gigs with other people and your the only one thats not in the other band plus there using songs you guys play,sorry man.

 

[hrodbert696]

If she can juggle two projects, more power to her.

If she can't juggle both and has to cancel practice for one to do the other, then either she needs to pick which one she's really in, or the one that's getting stiffed needs to fire her. Give her the chance to decide what she's doing.

 

[klejst]

One of the singers in my band joined another band, however stayed in our band as well. But shortly after he quit the other one. Still we did not know about it right away, but yeah it's true they can do what they want.

 

[artdrtr]

Thanks for the advice and letting me vent. It helps to have outside points of view -- gotta love TB! I've stepped back from the ledge and decided to see how practice goes this week (for the first time on a month) and not say anything more. Will be interesting if she brings up the gig since I've only talked to the guitarist who filled in with her about it. If so, I hope it doesn't turn into a bragfest on how great the gig was. I've decided not to tell the drummer -- knowing him, that would totally divide the band into two camps. Just gonna shut my mouth and be the bass player.

 

[hudpucker]

I think she has learned to prioritize between both bands, and has also helped the guitarist prioritize between both bands.

Yep. Past tense.

 

[ksandvik]

I would not work with musicians and singers that hide their other projects and have secret agendas. Nothing good comes out from that, quite the opposite.

 

[Gubna]

my drummer is in several other projects. I know how it goes. What ends up looking the most promising is what one person is going to make their priority. That's what I would do.

 

[themacinator]

Being in another band - totally ok.

Not telling you about the other band - not ok.

Canceling practice because of this other band - not ok.

Canceling practice 4 weeks in a row because of this other band - disrespectful, inconsiderate, and totally unacceptable.

Sounds like a band sit down is in order. Expectations need to be communicated, on all sides. Maybe you'll come to a consensus, maybe you won't.

Worst thing that happens is that you end up without a lead singer.

Which has already been the case for the last month anyway.

Agree on all points above.

 

[bassman_al]

Your band needs to hire Jong (Jive1) to sing lead. He will pack the house! See this video to find out why. Not a bad video, don't worry. Just good old "don't take yourself too seriously" fun!

 

[ErikW]

That's hilarious. Nice work Jive