Kitchy music venues to avoid

[N. Kentucky Bass]

I'm taking a road trip and decided to stop by Branson, Missouri. I've heard it's a big "music town." Turned out to be a total tourist trap. I picked one show to watch -- a musical review of "Top Country Music." The venue, Americana Theatre, was a tired, worn looking place inside and for a Wednesday night 8:00pm only about 50-75 people were in the audience that could have held 600. My ticket was about $45 for a two-hour show. While the music was to be famous country songs, the billing did not advertise the musicians' names but implied they were accomplished on their own rights.

The show began with a 15 minute warm up by a married couple who also were musicians in the show. Most of it was pitching us on the wonderful shows in Branson. Then the music started. There were four singers: two male, two female, and all had great voices. One male singer played lead electric guitar, keyboard, and harmonica. The other male singer played acoustic rhythm guitar. A third male didn't sing, but played excellent steel pedal, electric fiddle, and some electric guitar. There was a guy playing drums hidden behind some kind of barrier. Neither of the two female singers played an instrument. The music was pretty good, too loud, and during the first song I wondered: WHERE IS THE BASS?? I could hear it but not see the person playing it. Songs changed, and the tone of the bass changed from electric to double bass, etc. Huge fail. It was a BASS BACKING TRACK. What a disappointment!

The show continued for 45 minutes, then there was another 10 minutes or so of pitching us to buy their mugs, tee shirts, DVDs, etc. and finally got to a break.

I walked out and didn't look back.

I'm in Memphis today and will visit Sun Studio and the Stax Museum of American Soul Music. I checked out Nashville venues online and EVERY ONE of them did not reveal the price until after you hit the "Buy Ticket" button. Ticket prices were 2-3X the rates in Memphis. Bad sign -- I'll probably skip most of Nashville because it sounds worse than Branson.

Anyone have similar seedy music venue stories to tell that might save time and money?

 

[lordradish]

Ugh. Branson's on my list of places to avoid at all costs. It sounds like Homer Simpson described it... "Las Vegas as though Ned Flanders designed it." It sounds like a place where any sense of coolness or modernity is to be shunned at all costs.

 

[timmus]

I moved to MO a few years back and live about two hours to the east of Branson...I went once only because I was scheduled to play at an event near there. I grew up in northern NH, also a total tourist trap. I grew to detest touristy areas.

Branson is a place where washed up "artists" go to die...kinda reminded me of "A Mighty Wind" stage set.

 

[Pdaddy1978]

Branson sorta is what it is. The first time I was there, as a kid in the late 60s, it was still a teeny tiny backwater town in the Ozarks. The only attraction was Silver Dollar City, ann amusement park sorta like Knotts Berry Farm.
Some of the shows now are better than others. And the place does provide alot of musicians with a workaday paychecks. Mostly though, its cheesy, family friendly, pablum designed for old folks.
If your in Memphis today, Beale Street should be popping! Go to BB Kings and have some BBQ and hear some blues! Sun Studios is a fun tour as well.
Skip Graceland, and the neighborhood its in, if you value your life.
But don't forget to pay your respects to the king.....

 

[backin82]

It's funny. Around here, tons of people go to Branson for their yearly family vacations, and talk about it like it's the best place on earth. Based on my knowledge and perception of those people and their descriptions of what makes it great, I will avoid it at all costs. They are the same people who love going on cruises and consider the outlet malls and new cars every 3 years as peak expressions of wealth.

 

[Al T.]

I grew up in a tourist area and ,like Timmus, I despise them. I learned to not go anywhere I don't belong.

 

[Michedelic]

But don't forget to pay your respects to the king.....

Like this?

 

[JFlo]

I went to Branson on a family reunion 15 years ago and had the same reaction as you. Pretty much Chuck E. Cheese for senior citizens. Nothing against the musicians, more power to 'em if they can make a living doing that. Like you I'm from northern California and surrounded by great music and venues. For contrast: I was at my favorite local independent club last night and the touring band was talking about how special it is to have a place like that, that not everywhere has that in America. The club owners told them to mind the strict noise curfew because "the city hates us but the community loves us." That really stuck with me.

 

[JazznFunk]

Unfortunately, Nashville has become pretty much the same thing.

 

[Gopherbassist]

It sounds like a place where any sense of coolness or modernity is to be shunned at all costs.

Legend has it Yakov Smirnov chose to live in Branson precisely because it is so backwards.

 

[matty1039]

Have fun at Stax! I had to go to Memphis a few years ago for work. The day I left I had a few hours to kill before heading home and could only do one thing, so I went to Stax. It was a great museum. The studio room is awesome.

 

[Michedelic]

I moved to MO a few years back and live about two hours to the east of Branson...I went once only because I was scheduled to play at an event near there. I grew up in northern NH, also a total tourist trap. I grew to detest touristy areas.

Branson is a place where washed up "artists" go to die...kinda reminded me of "A Mighty Wind" stage set.

I’m originally from Kansas City, way up to the north and west, but moved away 34 years ago. Had enough. But even as a kid, Silver Dollar City was a big deal, a sort of hillbilly Disneyland. I never got taken there, I and my family didn’t care. Then the music thing in Branson got established.

I purposely avoided it as descriptions didn’t sound appealing, but during an early 90’s trip back to visit mom and my would-have-been stepdad, they inexplicably got this desire to go down there(it just wasn’t like them). I thought OK, what the hell, it’s on their dime, why not? Plus, Dwight Yoakam had a gig, I was down for that.

Well, he cancelled, but then Glen Campbell had a show at Andy Williams’ Moon River Theater(he was the first non-country performer to establish himself there). That worked for me, since I was calling the shots on the entertainment. It was very impressive. Then later I found a store run by one of Johnny Cash’s other non-musical daughters which featured classic old stage wear from Nashville/Grand Ole Opry, the Nudie stuff and so on. It was fun talking to her.

After all these decades, I can see where all of this could have gotten shopworn and gone downhill, or otherwise just jumped the shark.

 

[REV]

It's been a few years since I've been to Nashville but when I was there the joints on Broadway all had great music. The musicians there are all playing for tips so there is no cover charge. The musicians busking on the street were some of the best I've ever seen.

 

[OldSoulDownLow]

The music was pretty good, too loud, and during the first song I wondered: WHERE IS THE BASS?? I could hear it but not see the person playing it. Songs changed, and the tone of the bass changed from electric to double bass, etc. Huge fail. It was a BASS BACKING TRACK. What a disappointment!

Same thing happened here locally, outdoors, just about month ago. I hear the band, not too bad, I could definitely hear the bass, so I walk up to listen, immediately looking for the bass player, low and behold no bass to be seen. Bass backing track...all the other instruments were there, I immediately turned and left. Is this a trend? Is there a shortage of bass players that I'm unaware of?

 

[Michedelic]

Same thing happened here locally, outdoors, just about month ago. I hear the band, not too bad, I could definitely hear the bass, so I walk up to listen, immediately looking for the bass player, low and behold no bass to be seen. Bass backing track...all the other instruments were there, I immediately turned and left. Is this a trend? Is there a shortage of bass players that I'm unaware of?

Don’t you know we are the Rodney Dangerfields of the instrumentation world?

 

[JazznFunk]

The musicians there are all playing for tips so there is no cover charge.

I was in Nashville about 18 years ago for a run of gigs, and it was a little less far-gone than it is now. But - does anyone else see the problem with this, in a town which prides itself on being called 'Music City USA'? Bueller... Bueller? Those bars on Broadway are making money hand over fist from alcohol sales. And musicians are playing for tips. Robert's and a few other spots still have some sense of legitimacy, but the majority of Broadway's vibe today is like Myrtle Beach in a landlocked State.

 

[iiipopes]

I live north of Branson and grew up in another small town about an hour's drive away. Unfortunately, I agree with all the above. I have grown up and seen it from all sides, including when I lived and worked there for a bank, in neighboring communities where the high schools sports played each other, to playing in shows, to, well, never mind:
1) when it was a small town just after Table Rock Dam was built and Silver Dollar City was a cute theme park with Marvel cave - a real cave walking tour
2) the start of the two "family" music/comedy shows, Presleys and Baldknobbers
3) as it grew in the '80's to try to be the alternate family destination and big names moved in and built theaters, necessitating more infrastructure
4) rough times after that, to the point new items such as "Ozark Mountain Christmas" and an almost unhealthy pandering to veterans to get their tourist dollars became a thing to fill in time between the historic shutdown from October to March
5) to full-year-round tourist trap.
Yes, there are still a few good shows, but everything will have marketing attached, both before, during intermissions, and afterwards on your way out.

 

[Michedelic]

Anyone else see the problem with this, in a town which prides itself on being called 'Music City USA'? Bueller... Bueller? Those bars on Broadway are making money hand over fist from alcohol sales. And musicians are playing for tips.

When that slogan/sales pitch was coined, the world was a different place, let alone the fact that it really applies to the those who have already ‘made it’, and the business behind it.

 

[pholli00]

I'm taking a road trip and decided to stop by Branson, Missouri. I've heard it's a big "music town." Turned out to be a total tourist trap. I picked one show to watch -- a musical review of "Top Country Music." The venue, Americana Theatre, was a tired, worn looking place inside and for a Wednesday night 8:00pm only about 50-75 people were in the audience that could have held 600. My ticket was about $45 for a two-hour show. While the music was to be famous country songs, the billing did not advertise the musicians' names but implied they were accomplished on their own rights.

The show began with a 15 minute warm up by a married couple who also were musicians in the show. Most of it was pitching us on the wonderful shows in Branson. Then the music started. There were four singers: two male, two female, and all had great voices. One male singer played lead electric guitar, keyboard, and harmonica. The other male singer played acoustic rhythm guitar. A third male didn't sing, but played excellent steel pedal, electric fiddle, and some electric guitar. There was a guy playing drums hidden behind some kind of barrier. Neither of the two female singers played an instrument. The music was pretty good, too loud, and during the first song I wondered: WHERE IS THE BASS?? I could hear it but not see the person playing it. Songs changed, and the tone of the bass changed from electric to double bass, etc. Huge fail. It was a BASS BACKING TRACK. What a disappointment!

The show continued for 45 minutes, then there was another 10 minutes or so of pitching us to buy their mugs, tee shirts, DVDs, etc. and finally got to a break.

I walked out and didn't look back.

I'm in Memphis today and will visit Sun Studio and the Stax Museum of American Soul Music. I checked out Nashville venues online and EVERY ONE of them did not reveal the price until after you hit the "Buy Ticket" button. Ticket prices were 2-3X the rates in Memphis. Bad sign -- I'll probably skip most of Nashville because it sounds worse than Branson.

Anyone have similar seedy music venue stories to tell that might save time and money?

I saw Stryper in Branson back in the mid-80s.

 

[iiipopes]

It's funny. Around here, tons of people go to Branson for their yearly family vacations, and talk about it like it's the best place on earth. Based on my knowledge and perception of those people and their descriptions of what makes it great, I will avoid it at all costs. They are the same people who love going on cruises and consider the outlet malls and new cars every 3 years as peak expressions of wealth.

Let's clarify: cruises on Disney lines or similar, whether overgrown amusement parts or essentially floating casinos, not cruises that actually go somewhere on Cunard ships named after dead English queens.