There is a theory in linguistics that says that language determines thought. So if you think in English you will think differently than if you think in German or Chinese. So lets apply that to music. When you think music do you think about dots on paper with staff lines, or do you think of numbers on paper that represent fret numbers, or do you think of how the music sounds and you have a developed ear to percieve music.
So what "language" do you use to percieve music and learn songs.
Different people's brains are wired differently, and some people take to standard notation and some don't. I found out years ago that I play better, that is to say smoother, cleaner, and with more feeling, when I play by ear instead of by notation. I play better when I play with emotion, and I play less better when I play over-thinking theory and reading notes.
OK ... that being said my daughter wanted to learn bass, guitar, and piano. So I started showing her playing by ear, playing by tabs, and playing from sheet music. She totally did not get the ear thing, and the same for tabs, but she took to sheet music and standard notation.
So that being said what is right for me is not right for her. We are all different. So to say you must learn to read music or you will not be a real musician is not valid. Also we cannot say nobody should learn to read music it is a waste of time. The list of extreemly successful musicians and songwriters who do not read is very impressive, but also you can make an equally impressive list from those who do read.
So the bottom line is ....
Know yourself ...
Then decide what is the best approach for you.