No one is better, because she would have to come to the shameful realization that the only way to balance face out is to shave to other one off.
a friend of mine shaved one of her brother's legs while he was asleep...
TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
Join free Log in
Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.
No one is better, because she would have to come to the shameful realization that the only way to balance face out is to shave to other one off.
Wow, almost like a "The Saw" sorta thing...you're frighteningly devious my friend!

I have a good idea:
One day, when she is making breakfast, doesn't matter who it's for, give her a nice haymaker right in the eye. Nothing say "Step off, bitch!" like a nice shiner.
Dude! You can't hit a pregnant chick. Or actually a chick either for that matter. There are strict man laws against this thing.I have a good idea:
One day, when she is making breakfast, doesn't matter who it's for, give her a nice haymaker right in the eye. Nothing say "Step off, bitch!" like a nice shiner.
Use a fresh sharp Xacto blade, and slice the entire length of her tube of toothpaste open, and carefully put it back in its place. Do the edge where she won't obviously see a long cut in it.
Vaseline her car's entire steering wheel. Then the gearshifter.
Use a tube of Liquid Nails to glue her mouse to her computer desk.
Liquid cement her toothbrush's bristles all together.
Chisel all the makeup material out from her favorite compact.
When she's sleeping, leave the bedroom before her alarm clock goes off. Using a package of wooden shims, shim the door shut, TIGHT. INFINITELY TIGHT.
From the hallway, Saran Wrap the bedroom door's ENTIRE doorway. Before you finish sealing off the doorway, pour packaging peanuts from the top to fill the entire gap.
Get some really good porn spam email and send it to her. Then hover over her shoulder next time she goes to her computer, and when that pops up, give her a terrible time for being a pervert and cheating on you. Until you can't keep the straight face anymore!
Liquid Nails a ton of dishes and glasses to the kitchen counter.
Remove the toilet seat. Completely.
Rig up a fishing line to a spider, and when she's doing dishes, let the spider come dangling down right in front of her face.
And of course...
COTTAGE CHEESE + WARM SUN + CAR WITH WINDOWS SHUT = STENCH PERFECTION
Remind me to never p*ss you off? You are far too full of ideas!
Dude! You can't hit a pregnant chick. Or actually a chick either for that matter. There are strict man laws against this thing.
Well, if she's making breakfast, she probably hasn't put on any makeup yet. And it's totally ok to hit an ugly chick.
hahaha brilliant!I have a good idea:
One day, when she is making breakfast, doesn't matter who it's for, give her a nice haymaker right in the eye. Nothing say "Step off, bitch!" like a nice shiner.