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For the sake of TB, I fired up the A.S.S. (Advanced Simulation System) to see what would come out of it. I haven't put it to much use since the Qintar era of TB, but it was powerful enough for it to deduce that bc=tQ. For those who aren't old school TB OT, you can do a search. A supporting membership and access to the lobby is helpful.
So after firing up the A.S.S. lots of Bluewhine came out. And based on data processed through the A.S.S., I have discovered the true identity of Bluewhine.
He's not a 58 year old. No 58 year old spells as poorly as he does. Especially someone who claims to have a degree. The writing style of not knowing the differences between there, their, they're and to, too, and your, you're and many others are indicative of the texting style of a teenager or junior high kid.
Also as a 58 year old, he really doesn't know much about the music from his era. Much of it is very generic, and details tend to be incorrect, which the A.S.S. has verified through it's vast databases.
Also his old man complaints are too typical. Most old guys complain about their wives, mortgages, kids, jobs, golf game, kids on their lawn, inability to maintain an erection, etc. moreso than being tired all the time. If you've never been there, what you know of being old is getting tired and not hip to the scene. Typical teenage stereotype of getting old.
The A.S.S. has come up with a list of suspects as to what Bluewhine's true identity is.
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Stay tuned.
I seriously can't imagine Fassa butchering the English language as badly as BW does
OK folks.............
We have our conclusion. You may want to sit down, and grab a beer for this one. It's pretty intense. From the A.S.S. comes the identity of BW.
His image is below.
Sorry if you can't see it, but I can't see it either. Only super-duper computers like the A.S.S. can make out the image. But it may be better off that you can't see it. That's because BW is an e-penis. That is correct. Not an emo kid, mad scientist, ditzy blonde, black hole, Danny Bonaduce look-alike, Justin Beiber, Nerd avenger, or molester. Although it's easy to mistake him for one of the above, he's actually an e-penis.
After the A.S.S. sifted through the data and nonexisitence of logic structures, it decided to mine another of its databases, wikipedia and the urban dictionary for information. And based on this, BW has fit the criteria of an e-penis.
- Making unsubstaniated and unprovable claims on a message board. He speaks much of his experience, know how, playing ability, etc. but has virtually nothing to show for it. Even the high-schoolers that he rips on have a greater body of tangible work. But BW has not even a single recording, links to his band in signature, photos from gigs, etc.. You'd think you'd want to hype yourself up as an artist, but what an e-penis fears most is shrinkage, and this one can't afford any. In short, just basically being full of BS. As a 'pro', he clearly lacks experience in a glaring way. As an adult, he clearly lacks maturity in a ptitful way. But he likes pity, I guess.
- Doing things to try to increase post count or thread views. Starts with 'advice' or information as a 'pro' but quickly is invalidated as the rookie he actually is. So, he makes arrogant remarks and other irrational immature behavior to increase thread views for some twisted sense of validation and enlargement of the e-penis. He'll say he's wrong to get a couple of pats on the back and then goes back to being a douche so his thread still gets responses and feeds the e-penis.
The A.S.S. detected the pattern of a BW thread to confirm his identity. The A.S.S. generated a simple picture flowchart of events so as to not reiterate any irrationality, lunacy, and narcissism of BW. It's also simpler for us non super-duper computer people to understand.
Here's the diagram:
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But wait...................there's more!!!
Using triangulation, quardilation, and poor circulation, the A.S.S. has discovered the location and home of BW.
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So now we know who BW is and where he lives, so case is closed. We can see that BW is mainly harmless and should just be ignored. And even in this, the A.S.S. increased BW's view count in this lame thread, while stilll keeping him as the focus. As long as the A.S.S. is still running, TB is still safe for our families and generations to come.
well said good sir.. And thank you for the uproarious laughter... We shall point any high schoolers BlueWhine rips to this thread and the circle will be complete..
