Enjoy the benefits of a premium membership!
Upgrade Account
-
TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
Join free Log in
Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.
Please point out the red flag in my response
- Thread starter comatosedragon
- Start date
And he hadn't yet explained that he isn't a professor of music, which implies a good deal of knowledge. I'd be intimidated by that, or at the very least I'd have certain expectations about how those with less academic knowledge of music will be treated.
Maybe he went on a 3 hour tour.
D
Ok, I'll be honest here:
If I was looking for a musician for a jazz band, even a "low pressure" one, and got a reply from a person who had no experience with jazz whatsoever, never even played in a band, no experience with reading musical notation and also had a potentially problematic work schedule I think I would at least try the other bass player first (provided that the other bass player had more experience of course). I mean, two bass players in the same band is rarely a good idea and for all you know the other person might have a lot more experience with jazz.
I wouldn't ghost anyone though. I would at least give an honest reply.
Of course he might just be busy and will get back to you soon.
If I was looking for a musician for a jazz band, even a "low pressure" one, and got a reply from a person who had no experience with jazz whatsoever, never even played in a band, no experience with reading musical notation and also had a potentially problematic work schedule I think I would at least try the other bass player first (provided that the other bass player had more experience of course). I mean, two bass players in the same band is rarely a good idea and for all you know the other person might have a lot more experience with jazz.
I wouldn't ghost anyone though. I would at least give an honest reply.
Of course he might just be busy and will get back to you soon.
Agree with others could be the schedule or could be nothing to do with you. Too soon to tell, probably.
Whatever the reason I wouldn't take it personally. I answered a startup original band ad in the local rag (way before we had CL and the interwebz) where a single person got a bunch of people together. We met once and I thought it went well. Drummer was great, very funky and tasteful and got us all jamming. I felt like I was def the weak link but we all seemed to have a great time and it sounded good.
The keyboard player/BL said she'd be back in touch with everyone and I never heard back. I called and left a message never got a response and figured ok, I get the hint, no biggie. They were all great players, I'm sure they found someone better on bass.
A few months later I ran into the drummer and she said she never heard back either. She was easily the most talented of the group so if she didn't hear back I knew it wasn't me.
Years later I ran into the keyboard player (small town back then) and she apologized and said something came up in her life and she basically ghosted everyone and felt bad about it. But hey, things happen in people's lives.
Whatever the reason I wouldn't take it personally. I answered a startup original band ad in the local rag (way before we had CL and the interwebz) where a single person got a bunch of people together. We met once and I thought it went well. Drummer was great, very funky and tasteful and got us all jamming. I felt like I was def the weak link but we all seemed to have a great time and it sounded good.
The keyboard player/BL said she'd be back in touch with everyone and I never heard back. I called and left a message never got a response and figured ok, I get the hint, no biggie. They were all great players, I'm sure they found someone better on bass.
A few months later I ran into the drummer and she said she never heard back either. She was easily the most talented of the group so if she didn't hear back I knew it wasn't me.
Years later I ran into the keyboard player (small town back then) and she apologized and said something came up in her life and she basically ghosted everyone and felt bad about it. But hey, things happen in people's lives.
I didn't read the whole thread so forgive me if this has already been suggested.
The Magic Email: A follow-up that works
The Magic Email: A follow-up that works
"The college is in final exams right now and we have graduation next weekend. Give me a couple of weeks to get through this end of the semester “crunch", and then we can schedule something."
If you don't hear back in a couple of weeks, then you've been ghosted. Right now, as I see it, things are just going as described.
If you don't hear back in a couple of weeks, then you've been ghosted. Right now, as I see it, things are just going as described.
Bang zoom. Never admit weakness. I’m not saying that it was the dealbreaker, as the lack of schedule time is also one, but while your honesty is great, sometimes you can be too honest. But don’t worry about it. Sounds like you have your hands full as it is.
Probably the Third Shift schedule is a red flag: How are you going to do the " low pressure gigs" if you have to be to work by midnight ? Also, you can't read music and you mentioned " its someplace to start "; perhaps he thinks you are more of a " project " than the other cats, who can read? Finally, I may have missed this, but, have you tried to get in touch with him again?
I agree with others that it could be a simple reason for the ghosting (business at end of the semester, etc). However I recommend when replying to any listing to sell yourself, don’t over-explain your inexperience with playing music with others or any other short-coming. Similarly don’t overstate your abilities, but be sure to have at least two or three concise points as to why you would be a good match. Helpful to have some playing samples.
If it is true that the guy is ghosting you, I’d say he had some red flags himself and don’t sweat it. More stuff will come along even in a low volume area.
Either way hope you find some good like-minded folks and get to enjoy the music journey!
If it is true that the guy is ghosting you, I’d say he had some red flags himself and don’t sweat it. More stuff will come along even in a low volume area.
Either way hope you find some good like-minded folks and get to enjoy the music journey!
Rather than stew over this, take the time to get started on your lead-sheet or notation reading ability... Time is your friend, either way and it'll be good for you.
Haha, could be, it was sooo long ago I can't remember. The guitar player had been in Joe Rockhead and was a real nice guy, that's about all I remember.Was it Pam?
You may have been back pocketed in lieu of him finding a bass player that hits more bullet points, particularly the time issue.....for now, you are Shrodingers Bassist.....unfortunately, that happens sometimes
Last edited:
Firstly, i don't think you wrote anything to deserve being ghosted so try not to worry about that. I also don't think him being a professor is something to focus on either, professors can be idiots just like you and me. Reading his email it sounds like he is in a crunch for a couple weeks so i wouldn't expect a response until at least 2 weeks have passed or more. On the Rocksmith thing, most jazz musicians will not really have any clue what that even is.
If you don't mind, i'd like to give you some advice on preparing for a future jazz jam session. When it comes to charts for reference, most jazz players either don't use one or rely on Real Book lead sheets. There is also an app called iReal that contains chord sheets for most common jazz standards. Real Book lead sheets tend to have the chords above each measure for the bassist to play off of, plus a written melody for whomever is taking lead on the tune. iReal is chords only to avoid copyright issues. iReal also doubles as a backing track app to help you practice. Learning to read these types of charts is an essential skill. Having tunes memorized is even better of course.
Also, you want to have a handful of tunes that you know really well in your back pocket for a jam. That helps when you you get asked if you want to play anything as you can suggest something you know you can play. Even better if those tunes are fairly common. Here is a list that Aimee Nolte put together that i keep handy of her top 25 tunes to learn for a jam. I added a few myself. Good luck and have fun!
** What is this thing called love
25. Take the A Train
24. Autumn Leaves
23. All of Me
22. Blue Bossa
** Song for my Father
21. Satin Doll
20. Fly me to The Moon
19. So What
18. Straight no Chaser
** Blue Monk
17. Summertime
16. Oleo
15. Alone Together
14. How High the Moon
13. Softly, as in a Morning Sunrise
12. Bye Bye Blackbird
11. Mr PC
10. St Thomas
** Doxy
9. Someday my Prince will Come
8. Black Orpheus
7. Cherokee
6. Footprints
5. The Girl from Ipanema
4. All the Things You Are
3. On Green Dolphin St.
2. Stella by Starlight
1. Confirmation
If you want to play/jam in a jazz band, get to work learning to play these 25 songs. Try to learn and understand them by intervals, not just the notes, so you can quickly transpose to other keys.
I don’t know Rocksmith but IReal pro is a great app to get you on your way.
buldog5151bass
Kibble, milkbones, and P Basses. And redheads.
Get a Real Book. Listen to the songs as you follow the chord changes, and any written bass lines. It's a great way to familiarize yourself with the changes
"The guy reminds me of those PhDs who insists on being called “doctor” by EVERYONE."
I can't stand people who do that.
You gave too many reasons why you wouldn’t be a good fit.
As a PhD college professor playing in two bands, I can say with authority that I get exactly the same level of (dis)respect as any other bass player.
