Bass (fretless, fretted and upright) - My primary instrument since I was a teen. I learned to play bass before I learned to play guitar.
Guitar (acoustic and electric) - I'm a pretty good rhythm guitarist, not much of a lead player. Guitar is my primary songwriting instrument.
I sing lead and harmony vocals.
Ukulele - I got pretty good, but haven't played much in a few years.
Tiple - Same tuning/chords as a uke but with 10 steel strings. Fun fact: A tiple was the inspiration for Tom Petersson of Cheap Trick asking Hamer to build a 12-string bass.
Mandolin - Very basic abilities, enough to add some simple mando lines or chords to recordings.
Drums - I can do basic beats on a drum kit. Also djembe and cajon. I often put drum parts on my demo recordings by playing an old Boss DR-880 with my fingers.
Bass pedals - I bought a StudioLogic MP-113 pedalboard and use it to trigger the Syntronik app on an iPad, which has a passable Moog Taurus patch (called "The Bully"). But I have a long way to go before I'll be comfortable playing bass parts with my feet, while playing guitar or bass with my hands, and singing. Geddy has nothing to worry about.
Melodian - I came up with, and played, a melodian part on a demo of one of my songs, so I guess I can add that to the list.
Here's a little tune I wrote on the tiple. Should've tuned it beforehand.