Amen. Goes to show some in this thread value their egos more than their time.
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Quitting / Firing via Text Message Acceptable Now?
- Thread starter fu22ba55
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Amen. Goes to show some in this thread value their egos more than their time.
Last time I got "fired" was via e-mail in 2008.
That part didn't bother me nearly as much as losing a bunch of bookings in that super lean winter.
Honor the arrangements which were made and the medium by which you deliver the news becomes secondary. (Or at least give the other entity ample notice - and by ample I mean more than 2 weeks unless you know a new player can be found & brought up to speed that quickly.)
The guy who committed to play piano for our Salsa band for a summer season, then backed out after we'd committed to all the dates & venues? I honestly don't remember how he broke it to us - I just remember that I can't rely on him.
That part didn't bother me nearly as much as losing a bunch of bookings in that super lean winter.
Honor the arrangements which were made and the medium by which you deliver the news becomes secondary. (Or at least give the other entity ample notice - and by ample I mean more than 2 weeks unless you know a new player can be found & brought up to speed that quickly.)
The guy who committed to play piano for our Salsa band for a summer season, then backed out after we'd committed to all the dates & venues? I honestly don't remember how he broke it to us - I just remember that I can't rely on him.
Come to think of it, I think like others, I would prefer getting notice via text [over having to devote a whole evening to attending some awkward, heavy band meeting].
A good old fashioned voice conversation would be sufficiently ceremonious.
A good old fashioned voice conversation would be sufficiently ceremonious.
I've never been let go from a band but I think if it did happen I would prefer not to have to deal with the embarrassment of having it happen in front of others. Like I said above, our guitarist cried. He cried in front of one person, but that's one person too many, maybe.
It's undoubtedly going to be an emotional moment and I'd rather be done the courtesy of allowing those moments to be processed without an audience. But that is just me.
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Whats the difference how its done? When it’s over, its over
If it must be via text, at least compose a full sentence.
"U R fired" - that would be lame.
"U R fired" - that would be lame.
Like so many questions, what’s appropriate really depends on the situation:
- Does the person being fired have a close friendship with one or more bandmates?
- How long has the person been in the band?
- How far do bandmates have to travel for a face-to-face?
- How amicable is the firing?
- Is there a relationship here worth preserving?
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It depends on the situation. I quit one band through text, but I’m very close to the band leader, we communicate almost exclusively through text, and he pretty much knew that I’d end up leaving soon. It was very amicable and I still fill in for him occasionally.
When we're upset with someone we look for ways to pick at and discredit them as a means to make ourselves feel better. Two common ways this occurs is (1) focusing on how a message is delivered rather than on the message itself (2) hating on intergenerational differences.
These days people generally aren't as well-equipped to deal with social conflict. The younger, tech-dependent generations are generally worse at it. And the technology to avoid the immediate physical manifestations of social conflict is widely available and in everyday use. So, the technology is going to get used to avoid social conflict. Does it matter? Not really. Would I do it this way? No. But it is what it is.
And, as always, musicians gonna musician.
These days people generally aren't as well-equipped to deal with social conflict. The younger, tech-dependent generations are generally worse at it. And the technology to avoid the immediate physical manifestations of social conflict is widely available and in everyday use. So, the technology is going to get used to avoid social conflict. Does it matter? Not really. Would I do it this way? No. But it is what it is.
And, as always, musicians gonna musician.
The other thing too is are these paid gigs and rehearsals? I feel like if you're dealing with friends for passion projects than I would want the face to face but if this is just a gig the text is just more efficient. Time is the most valuable resource to me as a gigging musician and especially if there's no pay involved with this let's just keep it moving.
I'm almost 63 years old so you know the era I was brought up in. Texting and emailing are the chicken's way out, IMO. People do the same when calling in sick at work. Our company has a protocol that you reach your manager by cellphone first. It there is not an immediate answer or reply them you can text your call in sick.
This applies to quitting the band and other scenarios. Be an adult and talk face to face or person to person over the phone first. That's why I never used Twitter and quit FB years ago. Too easy to hide. Emotion and inflection cannot be easily discerned via text. Technology removes the humanity in our lives and not for the better. My rant is over lol
This applies to quitting the band and other scenarios. Be an adult and talk face to face or person to person over the phone first. That's why I never used Twitter and quit FB years ago. Too easy to hide. Emotion and inflection cannot be easily discerned via text. Technology removes the humanity in our lives and not for the better. My rant is over lol
I don't think text is appropriate. At least do it over the phone if you don't want to waste the person's time having them drive to a location, etc. Texting just seems too impersonal and easy, IMO.
I will concede that there is less wounded pride generated if the termination conversation is not done face-to-face.
But I turned seventy-two just last week and know I can handle an in-person "you're no good, you're no good baby, you're just no good" moment. I would take it as a challenge to get better. But at twenty-two? I don't know.
I would NEVER fire someone by text, even for a lousy side group. There is no class in that. Same thing goes for quitting. I don't ever want to be that type of guy. I prefer real conversations, even it they are difficult.
I think in certain situations it’s acceptable. Text is generally the easiest way for every member of a band to communicate outside of rehearsals.
I quit one band over text, but it was a waste of my time and I wasn’t going to drive out to rehearsal to do it. You just have to be cool about it, say what you have to say and give them some contacts for people to call to replace you.
I quit one band over text, but it was a waste of my time and I wasn’t going to drive out to rehearsal to do it. You just have to be cool about it, say what you have to say and give them some contacts for people to call to replace you.
Texting still beats not communicating at all.
It would really suck if your recently fired saxophonist shows up for the next rehearsal and the new saxophonist is already in place as the new hire. Talk about awkward!
It would really suck if your recently fired saxophonist shows up for the next rehearsal and the new saxophonist is already in place as the new hire. Talk about awkward!
I get the long travel, wasted time going to a rehearsal only to be fired arguments, but those I'd call extenuating circumstances, that might justify such an impersonal method of telling someone they're fired.
In most circumstances, especially if the person being fired is going to be blindsided by the news, just face up to the unpleasant job and do it face to face, don't wimp out and send the chicken s**t text.
I'm definitely in the "older" age group, but I don't see it as an age related thing, while there were no such things as text messages, or emails when I was in my twenties, there was still respect for other people and I'd never have fired someone even in my twenties, other than face to face, or a worst by phone if face to face wasn't feasible.
In most circumstances, especially if the person being fired is going to be blindsided by the news, just face up to the unpleasant job and do it face to face, don't wimp out and send the chicken s**t text.
I'm definitely in the "older" age group, but I don't see it as an age related thing, while there were no such things as text messages, or emails when I was in my twenties, there was still respect for other people and I'd never have fired someone even in my twenties, other than face to face, or a worst by phone if face to face wasn't feasible.
