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Seeing through eBay descriptions

#61
Dkerwood said:
Have no way to test it = it doesn't work
Selling these as a lot = cleaning out my trash can
Buyer to pay shipping costs = $20 shipping, $50 "handling"
Powers on = light turns on, but nothing else happens
No photos, sorry = it's easier to rob you blind when you can't see to begin with...
Vintage sound = crackly
Rich tone = muddy
Wife says it has to go = because she's tired of it sitting in the hall closet.
Bought this for my son's band = it's trashed
I'm selling because I upgraded = this can't even be a backup
I don't know anything about this = prepare to be screwed by an expert
It'll make someone a very lucky person = yeah, the guy selling it...
Click to expand...
These are great ones! :D

How about...

Wife says it has to go = so will yours
 
#64
Vintage = Older than me
Never abused = Wasn't damaged on purpose
Amazing = Please buy it
Work of art = eye of the beholder
Plays unbelievably = I don't understand how it makes such a noise
Congratulations = Don't let the door hit you on your way out
Hand made = I made it in shop class
A steal = Not of enough value to be considered grand larceny
 
#67
Here’s some more…

Robust and musical bass amp = heavy bass amp
Treated like a baby = maintenance problems every hour... and it leaks
Nasty growl = very bad feedback
Huge dynamics = either silent or full on, nothing in between
Endless tuning capability = will take forever to tune
 
#70
Dkerwood said:
Good call. I should have thought of that. Post deleted. :-)
Click to expand...
Thanks.

Here’s some more…

Extremely versatile = better used for something else besides music
Never played a better bass = never played bass
Remarkably clean = just steam-cleaned it

How about…

Current bid: US $0.99 = ?
Put in a lot of TLC = ?
 
#71
The sad thing is that I'll probably start using some of these when I put some of my axes up on the ebay in the next couple of weeks...

Things like, "remarkable shape for something of its age" and "includes original hardware" (because I'm taking the upgraded stuff off)... :-)
 
#75
will have it professionally set up before shipping=now where did i put that pesky toolbox, cant seem to find it.....
had it professionally setup=me and my screwdriver get an A for effort!!
I only played it in church=I only dropped it in churched
 
#79
Funky-Wunky said:
Check this guy out:

http://cgi.ebay.com/Vintage-1964-Fe...ryZ64400QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem
Click to expand...
Normally, I'd remind people not to link specific auctions, but :eek:

I like the questions section:

Q: You claim this is '100% original.' Could you please let me know how this part was tested and proven to be 100% original? How does one distinguish it from a 20c piece of plastic and some 2c screws?
Jul-20-06

A: I'll tell you how it was tested. Last night, while you were sleeping I shoved it up your *** hole. Then we removed it from your *** (with mounting screws in their current position) and carbon dated the crap that was on it... It's likely that you'll ask about a 20 cent piece of plastic because that's all you'll ever be able to afford you low life loser. Go back to baggin groceries you moron.

DEFINITELY what I'd expect out of a "power seller"... btw, does that "power seller" certificate look fake to anyone else?
 
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