I know the feeling. I work out of my home office so I'm usually around but there is nothing more irritating than going to the kitchen to grab a sandwich only to find out that they've come and gone. The last bass that I had shipped here I intercepted mid-way, and had them hold it at the local Fedex storefront. At least then I knew when and where I would connect with my new precious.
Edit: You can also have your seller use this option:
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Not good for a lot of transactions like ebay where paypal has to match a shipping address but amongst us hens here in the Club (where we know each other), it could be a good way to reduce the inevitable Fedex irritation.