• TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
    Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
    Join free Log in
    Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.

When is it time to hang it up?

#61
LBS-bass said:
What I realized over the past year is that, at my age, the thing driving me was a desire to reach a level of accomplishment and I was never going to be happy because I could never surround myself with the people I needed to make that happen and not also have friction.
Click to expand...

I hear you! The reason I continue to be stoked about playing in a stinky little bar band is that for the first time in a very, very long time, the people I've been playing with for the last 6 years have become my friends. Pre-COVID when we weren't playing together, we were hanging out together. This is one of my favorite band pictures, because we were not on a gig, we were out supporting our ex-guitarist's band. Left to right: Bill, our sound guy, now retired; guitarist Dr. B, me, BL Jane, guitarist Jimmy A, fan Hank Z, Drummy, and Mrs. Z: A bunch of louche* geezers who just don't know any better.

111819 at Broad Brook.jpeg

* Louche:
  • adj.
    Of questionable morality or repute.
  • adj.
    of questionable taste, decency, or morality; not reputable.:D
 
  • Like
Reactions: EddiePlaysBass, CallMeAl, LBS-bass and 2 others
#62
I had all of 2020 booked full....then Covid hit in March and EVERYTHING was cancelled for the rest of the year. My long time guitarist, and friend, decided to retire from playing (we're both 62 and have been friends and band mates for the past 25 years). We went from a 5 piece classic rock band (with 3 part harmonies to a 4 piece with 2 part harmonies). We have played 4 gigs so far... it's not the same but everyone seems to still enjoy our performances. My wife, the lead singer, is leaning towards not singing but still being supportive. That will make us a power trio with me as the only singer.

Sorry, that was such a long-winded explanation to say....things change, we either adapt or stop. Whatever your passion...go for it. As for me, I'll stop when either I find no joy in playing, can't physically play or when people no longer come to see us!
 
#63
My interest has come and gone over the years, (I'm 67) but I have had a bass in my possession since 1976 now and played seriously in bands at times and not at all other times and now until Covid hit, was playing with two fun-time jam bands on oldies and jazz tunes. No pressure, no endless rehearsals with no gigs, no struggling for gigs while youngsters were eagerly undercutting even semi-pro bands by offering to play for free in places that should have been paying bands, etc. etc. So over the past year I've been boning up on my reading and walking bass skills. Hopefully some of it will be evident when I get back to playing outside in the park this spring.
 
#64
dalkowski said:
With no gigs in sight and feeling kinda burned out on one of my bandmates, my fire was dying pre-COVID and I've let it fade over the last year. But I'm on a mission to find my old Simandl etudes book and digging into that, just to feel like I'm putting in some work. I shouldn't ever fully quit music because it's one of my few pleasures in this life.
Click to expand...
I also needed a “diversion-of-sorts” and am working my way through the Simandl etudes. Great minds think alike!!!
 
  • Like
Reactions: dalkowski
#68
I'll hang it up when I die. I don't care if I have 3 limbs removed and am blind and deaf. I'll find a way to play, damnit. Nobody will like it when I play without ears or useful limbs, but do I care?

Edit: I'm currently recording covers of my, and my band's guitarist's, favorite rock songs from our younger days, all covers, having a great time. I'm playing everything except guitars, although if I can grab an isolated drum track by the original artist I prefer that to playing drums myself unless it's pretty straight forward.

So we're having so much fun. So far fairly finished sounding are Knucklebones by the David Lee Roth band, and Limelight by Rush. Since I'm lead singer, they sound nothing like the originals, but that's kinda the point. It's just us having a blast. And we haven't seen each other face to face in months!
 
  • Like
Reactions: DaveDeVille
#69
Life is full of changes, and as far as I can see, the trick is to be able to accept that fact and be willing and able to adjust as those changes happen. I spent 45 years as a weekend warrior, holding down a full time job during the week and playing local bar gigs on the weekend.

It was a blast and gave me great satisfaction, but at some point I realized I was ready for a change, so now, I just get together with friends occasionally for an afternoon and evening of playing music and eating BBQ. It's still a blast, and I still get great satisfaction from it, it's just different, and in some ways better. I mean, if we get going on a song and the groove is happening and we want to keep going, trading leads for half an hour, then we can feel free to do that with no thought about whether it's good or not, it's just for us.

Music has been a part of my life as long as I can remember, so I hope I never have to hang it up.
 
  • Like
Reactions: CallMeAl
#70
This post resonates with me for sure. Years and years of playing (in my case drumming) being a primary focus of my life, eliminated overnight due to covid. And honestly for the first months it was surprisingly a relief. But recently I started learning bass and it's rekindled something for me. Not that I'm suggesting learning a new instrument, necessarily...

IMO almost everything surrounding playing music is a pain in the ass. But when the music and the playing is good, it's worth it and then some. When you're away from it for a while it's really easy to remember only the hassle of it all. I guess I'm saying you may be surprised how much you missed it if/when you get to just play with people again.
 
#71
From your avatar you live in Des Moines? Someone earlier mentioned getting into jazz if you haven't already. It's a challenging and fun genre to play.

Check the colleges in the area for music/jazz programs. You can enroll as a student to pursue a music degree or maybe as a continuing ed or non-credit student to play in one or more of the groups. Contact the music departments and tell them what you are looking for. Or for something completely different, many schools will have vocal/choral ensembles, guitar ensembles, piano ensembles, and wind ensembles which also have percussion. In addition, if they have a bass instructor, there could be an opportunity to sharpen your skills.

I played my share of rock and blues then went to a jazz camp for a week at a local community college in 1997. I got hooked immediately. I've gone to the camp about 20 times, never gets old! I enrolled at a the school as a non-credit student to be able to play in a combo or big band. I've done this for 18 yrs. There has been only one semester where I sat out to make room for a real student. I've also mentored new-to-jazz bass players in the group as well as doing writing and arranging for the group. Tons of fun!

Check it out. It could be a whole new experience for you.
 
#72
I think if someone doesn't feel like playing, don't play. When you do feel like playing, go play some more. Does it have to be a big life decision? You can just say, "I don't feeling like doing the band thing these days," and bow out. If you feel like doing the band thing again a year or five years later, go find some people and start something then. If you go a while (six months or a year, maybe) without touching gear, sell off the gear you're not touching, but keep a basic setup in case something comes up you want to do.

For myself, I'm pretty eager to get back into things. Not a huge rush - I can wait a few more weeks or months for more people to get vaccinated (including me, first dose April 8!) and feel more secure being out and for things to open up. But my bands are starting to rehearse again and make plans. I'm a hobbyist, 50, only playing for 11 or 12 years, have gotten in with a pretty good loose network of low-drama musicians, and not feeling burned out in the slightest yet. Gimme a gig!
 
  • Like
Reactions: CallMeAl
#73
MichaelPatrick said:
A serious question that I'm pondering...when is it time to hang it up.

I've been playing bass for 25 years, and for 20 of those years, I've been playing in bands on stages and in clubs. In the last band I was in, we came screeching to a halt as COVID shutdowns cancelled our last show mid-March of last year.

Since then, I've simply found other activities that I enjoy as much as playing bass. But, the past year has also basically laid the band I was in to rest, with some members being too freaked out to play out (especially in our state where mandates got relaxed, even before vaccines were taking off and across the board, many folks don't follow any sort of protocol once alcohol is involved).

I've gone through droughts before, but this somehow feels different. The pool of folks who I know to team up with keeps getting smaller and smaller and at this point, I'm not sure who I'd start a new project with. I'm also not sure what the end goal would be. I've really enjoyed entertaining crowds and music has been front and center of many of my friendships. It was never about making any money at it, and Lord knows we didn't. But, I'm hitting an age where I reflect a lot more and I think about what a show or set might look like and I'm just not feeling the balance in enthusiasm versus what you generally put up with in taking on live gigs.

I've witnessed a number of my friends that still perform, share surveys among their audiences about comfort levels of going out to see live music soon, and none of the findings seem re-assuring.

I suppose I'm answering my own question, but I really am asking for some additional perspective. Am I the only one feeling this? I have really enjoyed playing and it's sort of defined me throughout my late teens and most of my adult life. I'll still sit and strum a little acoustic guitar for my wife and dog every now and then, but throughout the past year, we've been more likely to find enjoyment in other stuff.
Click to expand...

I've been in this position before, 2 decades ago. I had a rough 4 years in a band that was looking to "make it" and it really fried me, not to mention I had other things in my life that were becoming more important. So, I quit the band, sold all my music gear except for a bass and 50 watt combo, and lit off to Central America and Europe for a month each. I really thought about what I wanted during my time away from the music scene, and I became much more selective with bands after that. I missed playing, but I didn't miss the BS associated with bands and the music scene, or at least the parts involved with "making it". I just wanted to play, and leave the stressful stuff behind. I think I've done a good job in that regard, and when a band becomes too stressful I won't hesitate to move on.

Anyway, There's nothing wrong with taking a break from it, for a few months or a few years, or even permanently. And, I totally get what you mean about the balance of enthusiasm vs what one puts up with at a gig. During the lockdown, my band managed to play a few shows, but we decided to back away after November of last year until the lockdowns started to ease and vaccinations were on the rise. During that time, I actually didn't play much, preferring to take a break from it and just play every now and then to keep the fingers moving. Now the band is rehearsing, we have a new drummer who is awesome and keeps me on my toes, and everyone in the band feels revitalized.

But, if I was asked to play a gig back in January, I would have turned it down and probably quit the band if pressured to play. I had no enthusiasm for it at all at the time, a general sense that I need to back away, and here was my opportunity. I feel way better about the band now, new blood certainly helps, so hopefully I won't feel the need for a break for a while.
 
#74
I get it. In the past I've gotten weary - sometimes almost burned out - on gig life.
But at least for me, absence has made the heart grow fonder. That and for the first time since '09 relying on regular work almost exclusively to pay rent.
As before, my takeaway has been that there are worse ways to make $75 than playing a couple sets.
Maybe I just haven't found the right straight job, yet.
 
  • Like
Reactions: CallMeAl
#75
This is a big NEVER for me. I play because it gives me reprieve from my mental illness. It also gives me great joy. I play nightly for my wife, and look forward to it every time. I was never much for playing in front of audiences in public, due to pretty severe social anxiety. So for me, since Covid hit, nothing has really changed all that much. I would suggest taking a break for a bit and then seeing how you feel before selling off all of your gear right away.
 
  • Like
Reactions: bassliner50, CallMeAl and hrodbert696
#78
And then being serious; I think it’s going to get hung up for a lot of us. We were playing out twice a week until March 2020. I just don’t see that many gigs coming back. Our drummer is working the hell out of it (he knows damn near everyone in town) but if we get one a month for the next year I’ll be stunned. The gigs are not there. Quite a few of the venues are no longer there. There’s no money there for the venues that will make it through to the other side...and we’re not to the other side of this thing yet, not by a long shot. Gonna take years to get people willing to accept that going out to eat and getting some drinks is safe again.
 
  • Like
Reactions: EddiePlaysBass and CallMeAl

Latest posts

Top Bottom
Back