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Why did you quit a band?
- Thread starter Cut the middle
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JeezyMcNuggles
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- Feb 23, 2018
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Ha, both. Hahaha. Well, the drummer was in it too. It wasn't just me being all about the band. But, 2 guys out of 6...moving on.
Or my case delusions of adequacy!
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Unclear handling of management, especially unclear about the real sum of money earned.
All members of the band were equal, but some were more equal than the others...
Right before a summer tour, the "more equal" two caused some fuss: 1) the pianist, who had a baby child and a husband with health problems couldn't swear on her complete presence: suddenly, no substitutes were accepted anymore; 2) violinist got fired due to a communication problem: wrong show name on posters - by the way, it was not her fault; 3) an email by the manager asking if there were any more problem: I simply replied that I couldn't stand conditions like that anymore.
One month after, the pianist, the violinist and me had our trio debut. It was 2008. We are still active as a trio/quartet. And happy.
All members of the band were equal, but some were more equal than the others...
Right before a summer tour, the "more equal" two caused some fuss: 1) the pianist, who had a baby child and a husband with health problems couldn't swear on her complete presence: suddenly, no substitutes were accepted anymore; 2) violinist got fired due to a communication problem: wrong show name on posters - by the way, it was not her fault; 3) an email by the manager asking if there were any more problem: I simply replied that I couldn't stand conditions like that anymore.
One month after, the pianist, the violinist and me had our trio debut. It was 2008. We are still active as a trio/quartet. And happy.
My drummer was a psycho who had to have everything his way and eventually tried to take over the band. The lead guitarist was his buddy who stood aside and refused to go against him, even after saying in texts that he knew the guy was wrong.
The last straw was when the rhythm guitarist and I found out that they were auditioning people to replace us behind our backs - and on our equipment, no less. Imagine their surprise when they came to the rehearsal studio one day and found that we’d cleaned all our stuff out (which included the PA and microphones), then went on social media, our web site and Dropbox and blocked them, then called the venue where our next gig was supposed to be and told them that these two guys were no longer associated with the band.
They were impressively ticked off, called us up and said “You can’t do this!” They were shocked to find out that we could, and had.
Unfortunately, because of the lockdown we haven’t been able to do anything about bringing in new players and starting up again - but we will.
The last straw was when the rhythm guitarist and I found out that they were auditioning people to replace us behind our backs - and on our equipment, no less. Imagine their surprise when they came to the rehearsal studio one day and found that we’d cleaned all our stuff out (which included the PA and microphones), then went on social media, our web site and Dropbox and blocked them, then called the venue where our next gig was supposed to be and told them that these two guys were no longer associated with the band.
They were impressively ticked off, called us up and said “You can’t do this!” They were shocked to find out that we could, and had.
Unfortunately, because of the lockdown we haven’t been able to do anything about bringing in new players and starting up again - but we will.
I've never played for a living, so I have had the luxury of quitting bands because I wanted to. That would usually take the form of me and another member of the band quitting because we thought we could do better elsewhere. As for why we would feel that way, standard stuff: the people were either bad players or bad people or the music was either too simple or not what we liked. Having a day job allows you to pretend that you have sterling artistic integrity, when really you have just been in a lot of failed amateur bands! 
Oof, that hit me right in the aspirations!I've never played for a living, so I have had the luxury of quitting bands because I wanted to. That would usually take the form of me and another member of the band quitting because we thought we could do better elsewhere. As for why we would feel that way, standard stuff: the people were either bad players or bad people or the music was either too simple or not what we liked. Having a day job allows you to pretend that you have sterling artistic integrity, when really you have just been in a lot of failed amateur bands!
I've only quit one band - this was back in 1992 give or take a year. I was in a cover band and had recently joined up with a band writing songs. I had time for only one band at the time so I chose the orginals band. The cover band I left officially retired last year after 25 years... the keyboardist and the bassist who replaced me were still there.
Maybe a Massive audience for the Dead, but might not be the best fit for a Stones band.
I also suspect that the audience for a Dead cover band is more enthusiastic than massive.
- Sep 14, 2012
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I’ll play....
Had a drummer/band leader that was a great musician, but just awful to be around. He would right these songs that were basically 4 songs molded into 1. The parts didn’t flow into each other well, so they ended up sounding like medleys. I thought it would kind of smooth out with time. It didn’t. I stuck around because I did like him, and he was a good drummer.
One night we played this house party wherein this wealthy guy invites all the local musicians and it’s basically a big jam session. He “hires” one band to basically play when no one else is playing. He jumps up and plays too.
So, he’s trying to play along with one of these original tunes that is near impossible to follow and it isn’t going well. The drummer yells to me that I need to tell him to stop playing.... at his own party... in his own house. I didn’t. He got mad at that.
Then in another one of these War and Peace book of long, nonsensical songs, the guitarist didn’t go to the next part when he should have, so I didn’t either. If we all screw up together, none of us screwed up. The drummer begins SCREAMING “GO YO THE CHORUS THE CHORUS THE CHORUS!!!” In this dude’s living room. I’ve only been more embarrassed playing one other time in my life (whole other story). I quit that night... or maybe I was fired... I don’t know. When I quit, he steered the conversation to sound like he was firing me. I hold no animosity and I actually owe the guy a lot. He introduced me to a lot of people that I still play with to this day.
Had a drummer/band leader that was a great musician, but just awful to be around. He would right these songs that were basically 4 songs molded into 1. The parts didn’t flow into each other well, so they ended up sounding like medleys. I thought it would kind of smooth out with time. It didn’t. I stuck around because I did like him, and he was a good drummer.
One night we played this house party wherein this wealthy guy invites all the local musicians and it’s basically a big jam session. He “hires” one band to basically play when no one else is playing. He jumps up and plays too.
So, he’s trying to play along with one of these original tunes that is near impossible to follow and it isn’t going well. The drummer yells to me that I need to tell him to stop playing.... at his own party... in his own house. I didn’t. He got mad at that.
Then in another one of these War and Peace book of long, nonsensical songs, the guitarist didn’t go to the next part when he should have, so I didn’t either. If we all screw up together, none of us screwed up. The drummer begins SCREAMING “GO YO THE CHORUS THE CHORUS THE CHORUS!!!” In this dude’s living room. I’ve only been more embarrassed playing one other time in my life (whole other story). I quit that night... or maybe I was fired... I don’t know. When I quit, he steered the conversation to sound like he was firing me. I hold no animosity and I actually owe the guy a lot. He introduced me to a lot of people that I still play with to this day.
There allota that being described here, I've experienced the Histrionic personality disorder in a band setting, and under Narcissistic we have a Whole Range of moderately functional and covert Narcissist types. They aren't necessarily clinical, that's just life, learn to identify one quickly, it's the same as self destructive substance abuse for failure to thrive. Pipe dreams, promises, and outright lies, forms of manipulation including seduction are common events with these types and if show business doesn't attract them, it isn't show business. minor Deities and little Potentates lurk there.
Jim Carr
Dr. Jim
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Was she having sex during shows or rehearsals? Or did the BL disapprove because she wasn't having sex with him?
No. In effect, she was fired from the band due to homophobia on the part of the BL and his wife!
I didn't find that out until years later. She and I had plans for a new reggae band, but the story has a very tragic end.
The young woman in question was my dear friend, and a deeply talented musician. Her full-time job was to help some of the most desperate people in the world at a government agency, but her life was cut short at age 24. She was murdered by an ex-boyfriend in a murder suicide.
She left behind a little boy, a Mom, siblings, friends, and about 80 co-workers who all loved her. I still miss her.
Not sure we've heard from this perspective yet.
I've been run out of a couple church groups but nothing so dramatic as some of you.
Although one time I nearly got in a fist fight with another guitarist (what I was playing then) over something stupid during Praise Band practice.
I figured it was the wrong place to be dukeing it out so I quit.
There was a lot of family stress at that time dealing with my father who was in the last years of Alzheimers and it was time for a clean break.
Also the self appointed leader of that group was a woman who didn't like me. Let's face it, that band sucked.
Ironically the drummer from that group is a Pastor friend (great drummer) who I still hang with occasionally.
I've been run out of a couple church groups but nothing so dramatic as some of you.
Although one time I nearly got in a fist fight with another guitarist (what I was playing then) over something stupid during Praise Band practice.
I figured it was the wrong place to be dukeing it out so I quit.
There was a lot of family stress at that time dealing with my father who was in the last years of Alzheimers and it was time for a clean break.
Also the self appointed leader of that group was a woman who didn't like me. Let's face it, that band sucked.
Ironically the drummer from that group is a Pastor friend (great drummer) who I still hang with occasionally.
Just to clarify my earlier post, we were making NO money so I was not dropping anyone in it by leaving. If it was going to jeopardise anyone else’s living I’d have given it a lot more thought before walking.
That is quite a twist. I'm sorry to hear that. My condolences.
I had that vocalist who kept wanting to Have his girlfriends be part of the band (as lead/backup vocalists, unfortunately they were tone deaf). Or he would meet this “really cool guy” at a show who is his new best friend and also plays an instrument. He’d invite that person to come to rehearsal (really to join the band) and would be all like, “we can have 2 drummers!” Or “We can have 2 bass players!”
He couldn’t separate his private life from the band and always wanted everyone important to him to be in the band. It was ridiculous. He was an excellent vocalist so we’d humor him occasionally (We weren’t really professionals, we all had other jobs it was more for fun) but it would get ridiculous and rehearsals would just become jam sessions with too many people who didn’t know the songs and weren’t any good anyway.
That was the last band I quit.
He couldn’t separate his private life from the band and always wanted everyone important to him to be in the band. It was ridiculous. He was an excellent vocalist so we’d humor him occasionally (We weren’t really professionals, we all had other jobs it was more for fun) but it would get ridiculous and rehearsals would just become jam sessions with too many people who didn’t know the songs and weren’t any good anyway.
That was the last band I quit.
