Why Text every freakin' time to ask "Is practice still on for tonight?"

[fishdude101101]

It seems that most of these answers are a combination of issues.
Bad communication, lack of readiness, others cancelling last minute.
So worst case is you ask them in person politely why they keep asking. You'll know your answer on how they reply.
Could be nothing or could be something more. Then apply as needed.

This is a good take I think. I've dealt with too many cancellations, especially on weeknight rehearsals. When we rehearse during the week, I have to drastically alter my routine, so it's irritating when cancellations happen that same day. It usually comes from band members who work from home now and don't get why its a big deal.

 

[Baa]

In my old band everybody had 9-5 jobs and knew that we had rehearsal wednesdays 6 pm.
No confirmation text needed.

In my new band i'm the only one with a 9-5 job and we rehearse different times/different days.
Drummer works in public transportation and guitarist works in a hospital, so there is always a chance/risk for delays and stuff.
Now i appreciate the confirmation texts.

 

[Saetia]

Nothing wrong with reaasurance by any means, especially when it takes next to no time to read and reply to a text message. We all have lives, work... families ect to tend to and it can be hard to juggle those priorities with being in a band. We all choose to have this hobby and set aside time in our day to day grind to participate. That being said, the text message is reassurance to their investment of time that given day. Rather expend the effort of two people sending texts than one person getting ready or in transit to be told practice is canceled.

 

[Saetia]

I mean no slight, but I felt perhaps this may need mention... what about the text gets under your skin and where does this annoyance truly stem from?

 

[G On Bass]

I would love it if we had confirmation day-of. Things change, stuff comes up, people's lives happen. Nothing wrong with a verification. IMHO that text is a good thing.

 

[Dega60]

Well, maybe it SHOULD be. If someone signs up to be in a band then it should be as important and anything else in their live that they have committed to. IMO.

My priority list

1 - Family
2 - Job (yea, the one that pays my bills and lets me buy strings and gas to get to practice)
3 - Bandmates / Band

Guess that disqualifies me from ever being in a band with you

That said - I have never missed a gig and if I need to miss a rehearsal (99 out of a 100 times it's work related) I give plenty of notice and try to reschedule as opposed to cancel. Most of us have jobs and family and we all understand that crap happens. Someone (not the same person each time) in my current band almost always sends a text day of to confirm. Takes 2 seconds to send a thumbs up emoji or text "yea". Never saw thaat as an issue

 

[herndonbassist]

I mean no slight, but I felt perhaps this may need mention... what about the text gets under your skin and where does this annoyance truly stem from?

This ^

* edit: disobeyed my own rules

 

[Tony In Philly]

If you've ever played in a band where most members have ADHD along with other assorted personality disorders, it's actually a good practice to do so.

 

[Knavery]

My priority list

1 - Family
2 - Job (yea, the one that pays my bills and lets me buy strings and gas to get to practice)
3 - Bandmates / Band

Guess that disqualifies me from ever being in a band with you

That said - I have never missed a gig and if I need to miss a rehearsal (99 out of a 100 times it's work related) I give plenty of notice and try to reschedule as opposed to cancel. Most of us have jobs and family and we all understand that crap happens. Someone (not the same person each time) in my current band almost always sends a text day of to confirm. Takes 2 seconds to send a thumbs up emoji or text "yea". Never saw thaat as an issue

This... Out of those three, a band would be third on my list as well. In this day and age, I couldn't possibly imagine it being higher.

 

[getrhythm]

They'd rather be somewhere else.

 

[Bass Viking]

That said - I have never missed a gig and if I need to miss a rehearsal (99 out of a 100 times it's work related) I give plenty of notice and try to reschedule as opposed to cancel.

You've missed 100 rehearsals?!!

 

[Bob E]

Just to screw with another band member.

 

[51PRI]

I mean no slight, but I felt perhaps this may need mention... what about the text gets under your skin and where does this annoyance truly stem from?

Because I think we all adults (And I mean REALLY adults, like as in old) and we should all be responsible enough to know that "Wednesday night is Band Night" or whatever it is and a weekly confirmation should not be necessary. I doubt that anyone calls their job every day to see if they still have to work, or call the church on Sundays to see if worship service is "still on." Adults should be able to commit to something and see it through without a weekly reminder, IMO.

I got a text to tell me a rehearsal was cancelled from the electric guitarist because apparently there was an email thread that occurred as I was loading up where one of the singers wanted to cancel, and then everyone who doesn't have to actually load anything took the opportunity to dogpile on the "let's cancel" train.

Without that text, I would have showed up and been waiting around for someone to arrive and let me in the building.

Good for them to text you but why weren't you a part of the initial text?

Is it your responsibility to answer him? Does this somehow cause you extra work? If so, then say something to the offending party.

If not then forget about it. With everything happening in the world right now, getting your panties in a wad over a recurring text message seems rather pointless. Sorry!

Just venting...

I'm sure that there's a thread somewhere about the things that you enjoy about this band, but for some reason I've yet to be able to find it.

There ARE a lot of things I enjoy about the band. I can't see how that would make an interesting thread, though.

Gasoline $3.50 / gallon.

Gas is still going down. Under $3 a gallon here.

OK, at first I just thought you were unreasonably grumpy. Maybe taking a walk would help. I don't know. Getting one text a week is not rant worthy. Period. So you were already being .... unreasonable.

But with this last statement you're makes you come across as a jerk.

I love my band mates. We are like family. If they personally needed something I would be there for them.

That said, my band is on like page three of my list of priorities. I have a a wife, two kids, their activities, church, and lots of other things that come before band rehearsal. So do my band mates. We created this band with that in mind. Family/business first.

So, no, I am not as committed to my band as I am a long list of other things. But, guess what, you presumptuous (enter expletive here), I show up dead ready for anything we're doing. I learn my bass and vocal parts cold. I provide the place for us to rehearse (a bonus room I could use for a dozen other things). My wife usually whips up some food for the band. I keep my jam room fridge stocked. I'm the first one to the show (after usually loading the PA into MY truck by myself). I usually have it unloaded and am halfway through setting up the lights when the rest of them start to arrive.

My point? Just because the band isn't even NEAR the top of my priority list, I'm committed ENOUGH. That's all that matters.

I hope you can play your instrument ridiculously well. It seems you're after a career in music. Many if the rest of us have other lives. And that's OK.

A former bandmate (RIP) had a "come to Jesus" moment with the band we were in together a decade ago. His opinion was that a band should be just as important to a band member as the other things in his life and a commitment to a band and to band rehearsals should be important. He had, in my opinion, a valid point.

Well???



Is it??




Still on??

It was and it went well.

Just tell them:"S.O.P.Unless otherwise noted practice is as scheduled"

Exactly.

For a while I had to travel 3 hours each way for a band. Happened a few times that 1 of the other members didnt show up. And I would have dragged myself, a bass and a small/medium amp around the whole day for basically nothing.. So I always double check, unless we have some really good system in place, like the online calendar thing.....

Well, yes, a three hour drive each way would be worth a text regarding rehearsals. SIDEBAR: I really can't imagine being in a band that required rehearsals three hours away. Must be a really good band?

I always confirm a practice on the day of the practice. People have lives, sometimes things change. Id rather find out practice was cancelled before loading my car. This seems like a weird thing to take an issue with (so much so that you created a thread to address it)

Emergencies can happen. However, a mid-afternoon text wouldn't anticipate an emergency 30 minutes before practice.

It doesn't bother me at, when I get such a text. It would bother, if I were called 'anal' by a backbiting bandmate.

What WOULD you call it when one person texts EVERY WEEK "is practice still on?"

OP- didn't you start 3 separate threads on reasons for cancelling practice? And you wonder why someone would check?

Different band, and different situations, and that band is technically on "hiatus" but likely over.

In my experience, people who are going to bail on practice often wait until the last minute. A text of this nature can sometimes promt them to do it sooner?

As I stated above, a mid-afternoon text "are we still practicing?" wouldn't prevent a last minute cancellation or no-show from happening.

Tell the band to assume there will be a practice every what ever frequency you have set together and only text if unable to everyone by the person who cannot this time around... Voilà

Well, exactly, and I have, almost word for word. And yet it still happens.

Maybe I'll pull a fast one text time and text the day BEFORE practice "are we still on for tomorrow night?" and see what happens.

I'm wondering if the people who have an issue with people confirming practice on the day of the practice are the ones who flake out and cancel last minute and see no issue with doing it repeatedly?

In this case, no.

My priority list

1 - Family
2 - Job (yea, the one that pays my bills and lets me buy strings and gas to get to practice)
3 - Bandmates / Band

Guess that disqualifies me from ever being in a band with you

That said - I have never missed a gig and if I need to miss a rehearsal (99 out of a 100 times it's work related) I give plenty of notice and try to reschedule as opposed to cancel. Most of us have jobs and family and we all understand that crap happens. Someone (not the same person each time) in my current band almost always sends a text day of to confirm. Takes 2 seconds to send a thumbs up emoji or text "yea". Never saw thaat as an issue

Not the same. This is a side issue to the thread subject, but, what I would refer to is someone for whom absolutely ANYTHING takes precedence over rehearsal. Last minute his girlfriend wants to go out to dinner...decides to go fishing...a lot of things to do around the house, etc.

 

[BadSanta1281]

Texting to confirm seems like a good plan.

I don't understand why it would be upsetting.

 

[Nev375]

Because I don't want to drive another 70 miles to practice and get there to:

Larry: "Didn't Tony call you? We cancelled for tonight."
*I call Tony on Larry's phone.*

Tony: "Yeah I sent out a text. Didn't you get it?"
Me: "No Tony, I didn't get the text because like I told you for the umpteenth time, I have a land line."

*Note: this is the 90's and cell phones aren't ubiquitous yet.*
Tony: "Well, that's not my fault. You should get a cell. Sorry dude."

*I drive 70 miles home and unload my stack... again.
... And yes. Tony was the drummer.

 

[mwbassace]

My question is, are y'all that have an issue with this the same ones who don't play gigs over 30 min away? I drive 30 to 45 minutes to rehearse with my 2 bands, plus that far & farther for gigs. And being responsible adults with family obligations (aging parents, custody of grandkids, etc.) that can creep up outta nowhere means i'm confirming things on the regular.

 

[jdh3000]

I text something the day of because I have shown up to practice only to find out the BL, who owns the rehearsal space, had forgotten it was that day and was out of town.

After having to drive 30 miles both ways for nothing, it's not a question as much as a reminder.

Maybe one person out of the group doesn't need to be reminded, but obviously one in mine did.

I've been in several bands where someone forgot about it now and then. Before text, I used to call everyone to remind them... Imagine how annoying that would be for you.

 

[gln1955]

 

[Gustopher]

What's the problem here again? People want everyone to be committed to the band, but when someone checks in to make sure everything is going as planned that is an issue? Dear lord, we have soft lives if this annoys us.

 

[51PRI]

What's the problem here again? People want everyone to be committed to the band, but when someone checks in to make sure everything is going as planned that is an issue? Dear lord, we have soft lives if this annoys us.

Well, we DO have soft lives, most of us, compared to previous times on Earth, and compared to other parts of the world.

OTOH why can't it just be known that we practice every Thursday, or whatever, and everyone be adult enough to show up, OR, if they have a last minute conflict or emergency, let the other band members know ASAP?